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I have always been a polite person. And I try to be kind to others.
Since my husband died, it takes a LOT to set me off. You want to cut me off in traffic, go ahead. I already experienced the worst time of my life, you are not going to have an effect on my day. Although I have to confess to raging at a lady who entered a 4 way intersection, southbound, when she could see it was blocked up ahead and not moving, thus preventing me from going out when MY light was green. The whole area is famous for these intersections, most have "Do not block intersection" signs up by the traffic lights. I doubt I ruined her day though, she gave me the dumb shrug and grin.
We were all taught about politeness, I'm sure, but in my case the "brashness of youth" ( perhaps, perhaps rebelling against authority) meant i never used politeness very well.
Think, for an example: someone is in middle of grocery or department store aisle looking at shelves of goods. You see what you want or need, do you say "excuse me"? Or do you just step in their field of vision to grab what you want?
When some stranger or store employee reaches an item on the too shelf for you do you say " thank you"?
If you asked for their help in reaching that item, did you say " would you get me one of XX for me, PLEASE"? Or did you just essentially say "gimme that "?
Do you hold open the door for others? Or just let it slam behind you, even if its in the next person's face? If someone holds the door for you do you say thank you?
Im just wondering.
Like i Said perhaps the brashness of youth or the fact i worked retail where you are basically paid to bend over backward to accommodate them, i used to NOT be so polite to others.
As i have gotten older, i have been polite much much more. And 10 years ago when i first started using a cane, people who were able, would go out of their way to hold the door for me, or offer to carry items fir me, so i became even more polite.
Lol, i found its only words. And only a few of them. And it dies NOT hurt to say them (contrary to what some of all ages may think), and can often brighten someone's day.
So, have you become MORE polite or LESS polite as you aged???
No change. I was taught to be polite and have always said please and thank you.
But I have noticed that since I've retired, I'm more patient with other people. When I was working, I was always in a hurry and wanted to nudge people out of my way, never did, of course, just wished I could. Now, I wait patiently for people to move along. I may have unintentionally scowled at them a bit back then, and now I'm careful to make sure I smile instead.
I've been a terrible people-pleaser all my life- put up with crap, don't complain, retreat rather than confront. I'm still working on that. What I notice most is that when meetings go longer than planned in one of my volunteer functions, no timed agenda, getting off topic.. when I get fed up I say, "I've got to go" and I leave. It feels good. I'm also better about politely repeating a question when someone's answer is evasive and they don't answer my question. Baby steps even though I'm 65.
For sure, less polite. I have, I believe, appropriate manners, but I speak out on my own behalf, much more frequently than I did in years gone by. This is not one of my best traits and doesn't get me as far as I would like.
Another fault of mine is voicing my observations when I would be better served holding my tongue.
"So, have you become MORE polite or LESS polite as you aged???"
polite to a fault. my wife says i kill them with kindness.
latest example:
Walmart gas pump. i pull in, park, and grab the pump handle.
a driver pulls in behind me and sticks his hand out the window, motioning me over to him.
well, i go over. he asks: "Didn't you see me waiting for this GD pump?" (in a very distinctive US regional accent)
No sir, did you want to get some gas?
"What the F else would i want?"
i don't know. just let me move out of your way.
...which i do and circle around behind him to wait my turn.
"GD it? what now?"
Sir?
"Why the F did you do that?"
to get gas.
then he laughs out loud. HAHAHA.
"here, take this Twenty. never seen that before. you (regional) guys are the greatest."
Each generation seems gets more rude so I react accordingly to them. The older people are, the more respect they seem to have for others. The younger they are the less respect they have. I'm referring to around the start of teenage years.
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