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Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
34,690 posts, read 57,994,855 times
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Most retiree support I have seen is spent on numerous rehab ...(addictions / health / mental health) (at $20k to $100k per rehab treatment)
Several retired friends are raising their grandkids / sibling's kids... due to drugs / abandonment, incarceration... (paying for raising grandkids + providing dependent healthcare)
College?
It is really cheap (loans to students) and very effective to have kids pay-their-own-way'
If for some reason you desire... you can repay the deferred loans as a graduation gift. At least the student covered the need and SIGNED the note!(if borrowing).
By design... mine were on their own financially well before they attended college at age 16. I would have been a dismal failure as a parent had I not equipped them for that. (I was a caregiver for a parent by age 18), I wanted them to be capable, but hope they will never be required to disrupt their life (again) for me. Being a 'kid' was rough enough for them! (Homeschooling, volunteering, farming, living internationally...)
What many don't realize is that if parents support their adult children, more than likely the children will end up financially supporting their elderly parents later on.
I don't understand why the federal student loan application REQUIRES the parent's financial info. If the applicant is an adult, how is this legal?
They're not an adult on the FAFSA until they are 24. And colleges and grad schools may still want parent info, even when an adult goes back to school! They want to know what the family's financial situation is, so that they can focus aid on people who come from very poor families, even if the students are way past the usual age for school.
What many don't realize is that if parents support their adult children, more than likely the children will end up financially supporting their elderly parents later on.
To be honest, I haven't seen that happening. Among my circle of friends I've seen the kids show up to give physical support (help grandma move to her new place, for example), and to be present/talk to doctors when a parent is dying. Financial help or moving in with the kids, not really. Maybe that will change with time.
Most retiree support I have seen is spent on numerous rehab ...(addictions / health / mental health) (at $20k to $100k per rehab treatment)
Several retired friends are raising their grandkids / sibling's kids... due to drugs / abandonment, incarceration... (paying for raising grandkids + providing dependent healthcare)
College?
It is really cheap (loans to students) and very effective to have kids pay-their-own-way'
If for some reason you desire... you can repay the deferred loans as a graduation gift. At least the student covered the need and SIGNED the note!(if borrowing).
By design... mine were on their own financially well before they attended college at age 16. I would have been a dismal failure as a parent had I not equipped them for that. (I was a caregiver for a parent by age 18), I wanted them to be capable, but hope they will never be required to disrupt their life (again) for me. Being a 'kid' was rough enough for them! (Homeschooling, volunteering, farming, living internationally...)
As many have pointed out, financial aid to students is based on the parents’ financial profile. If your parents make a lot of money, the options available as a student are often more limited than if your parents make little money. While some states have plentiful scholarship/low cost options for all students, that is certainly not the case in all states.
I used to work with a woman who called her mom on the phone during the day, yelling at her about taking care of the kids, cleaning their rooms, even how to arrange the toys in their rooms. She would verbally abuse her poor mom who was selflessly watching the kids so her daughter could work and not have to pay for childcare.
I know quite a few people who do free daycare for the grandkids. One, on the Widows/Widowers Board I used to frequent, really needed a paying job but she knew if she quit doing the free daycare she'd never be allowed to see her grandkids again. Another drives 3 hours to take care of hers a couple of days a week. Daughter is a psychiatric nurse; I don't know what son-in-law does. I love mine dearly and I'm very active for my age, but those two little sweeties wear me out. They live 3 hours away and DDIL is a SAHM so that's not happening in my case.
Our youngest was not a student and it was a challenge to get him through school. We told him that he would need to find a full-time job when he graduated from HS. The school counselors advised us and him to apply to Tier 4 colleges. We knew he was not ready. He has been working full-time for nearly two years and living on his own. We gave him a car to get to work and he has been living in a studio condo we own and paying the bills to understand what it is like to live on his own. The cost to live in the condo is fairly low and near where he works allowing him to save a considerable amount of his earnings. He has invested a substantial portion in stocks as well as savings.
This has been a good experience for him and he is exploring opportunities where he works. They will pay for courses but also offer training opportunities some of which he has already taken advantage of.
At first he thought we were being unfair since he did not want to move out and most of his HS friends never worked a job while in HS or while they are in college. They spend most of their time playing video games and are given generous allowances for personal entertainment and expenses. However, our son just took his first vacation to Florida and is planning a trip out of the country in the near future. Although it has been a soft launch for him, he is not doing bad for young 20 year old and has gained a lot of social and personal experience and confidence as he plans his future path.
Most retiree support I have seen is spent on numerous rehab ...(addictions / health / mental health) (at $20k to $100k per rehab treatment)
Several retired friends are raising their grandkids / sibling's kids... due to drugs / abandonment, incarceration... (paying for raising grandkids + providing dependent healthcare)
College?
It is really cheap (loans to students) and very effective to have kids pay-their-own-way'
If for some reason you desire... you can repay the deferred loans as a graduation gift. At least the student covered the need and SIGNED the note!(if borrowing).
By design... mine were on their own financially well before they attended college at age 16. I would have been a dismal failure as a parent had I not equipped them for that. (I was a caregiver for a parent by age 18), I wanted them to be capable, but hope they will never be required to disrupt their life (again) for me. Being a 'kid' was rough enough for them! (Homeschooling, volunteering, farming, living internationally...)
I've seen a ton of this myself.
One of my high school best friends had a drug addiction and mental health issues. He shot himself with ratshot and nearly destroyed his eye. His parents paid for an extremely expensive eye procedure at a teaching hospital which saved his vision.
^^^^^^^ We don't know the pain others are feeling.
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