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LOL. Or when you are taking a survey, and it goes something like this:
What is your age?
18-29
30-45
46-64
65+
Same goes for mileage in a used car, although infinity usually takes place after 150,000 miles...
Further Adventures of 30something Milennial Boss and Newly Hired Retiree......
30something Milennial Boss: "Jane, take your company provided smartphone and text Roger, the head of the Fielding account that I will tweet some promotions on Twitter and friend his company's page of Facebook!!"
Newly Hired Retiree: "Yes sir, I will get right on it."..
30something Milennial Boss: (Two hours later) "Jane, what on earth did you send Roger!!?? He pulled the Fielding account away from us!! He says I called him a twit on tweeter, and he's no friend and doesn't have the guts to face me!!"...
Newly Hired Retiree: "Oh gosh!!!... I'm so sorry! It's the tiny keyboard on this phone and I didn't have my glasses, plus I'm new to all this social media. I must have typed Twitting on Tweeter and Facing on Friendbook!"...
Bunch of old guys who were buds starting in first grade are chewing the fat.
Bud 1: Remember when Miz Meanie rapped Ernie on the knuckle for throwing a spitball?
Bud 2: Oh, yes, indeedy, I do. The spitball was bright yellow and kind of plopped in Marylou’s dress collar because he made it too big and soggy to fly any farther away. She usually sat in the next seat over but Janie was out sick that day so Marylou took Janie’s seat to spite her. Those two were always doing catty things to each other. And that yellow!
Bud 3: Hehhehheh, it was torn from the writing paper we all had to use when the school switched from white to yellow paper cuz it was cheaper! And the lines were spaced closed together, too, and that saved money cuz we could fit more words on a page. I know that cuz I wrote “History stinks” 231 times on the new yellow paper and could only write it 196 times on the old paper.
Bud 4: Day-um, your memory for sure is great!
Bud 5: Was that the same week we had 4 false fire alarms?
Bud 1: No, that was the week AFTER. But the same week as Ernie’s big yellow spitball, the cafeteria served a new and awful lunch.
Bud 5: Oh, yeah. I remember that! They took all the hamburger bits leftover from Tuesday’s sloppy joes, mixed ‘em with scraps of the pizza crust they had to throw out because the cook left out something and it turned out hard as a rock. Well, we THOUGHT they threw it out, but the stuff softened into alien mush from being soaked in the old sloppy joe stuff, and then they tried to pass it off as some foofoo foreign dish...
Bud 4: They stuck canned green beans on it, covered it with cheese, and nobody would eat it.
Bud 3: Speaking of eat, I’m starved! We must’ve had breakfast really, really early today. When did we meet at the Pancake House?
Bud 5: We met at 9 am and now it’s 10:30 am. And we’re still at the Pancake House...I think. But I can’t remember what I ate, can you?
Reminds me of the comment my daughter made one time about evening "senior parties" and events, over by 8:30PM so the participants could make it home by their 9PM bedtimes.
Quote:
Originally Posted by galaxyhi
Depends on the season.
Many old folks have to get home before dark.
Why?
Because they can't see the road after dark.
Many of the retirees I hang with go home by 9pm -- but that's because they're up at 6:30am to catch the first chair on the mountains. They ski 10,000 vertical before lunch time. One friend of mine has over 80 days on the ski slopes and over 1,000,000 vertical feet so far this ski season.
Two senior ladies were out for a Sunday drive in a huge car. Neither of them could really see too much over the dashboard.
When they came to an intersection, the light was red yet they kept on cruising through.
The passenger thought to herself, "I feel like I'm losing it, but I swear we just drove through a red light."
A few minutes later, they drove through another red light. The passenger was almost certain that the light had been red but was still slightly concerned that she might be going mad, so she decided to give the driver one last chance.
As they were approaching the next intersection, the passenger paid a great deal of attention. This time the lights were certainly red, yet just as before they just sped past.
"Susan!" the passenger yelled. "Do you know we just ran 3 red lights in a row? We could have been killed!"
"Oh, am I driving?" came the reply.
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