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Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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In my current position, I don't happen to have much in common with my co-workers, whose ages range from 23 to 60. As a manager it's not going to appear appropriate for me to hang out with one of my subordinates. None of them hang out together either. The only people I see outside of work are those in other departments that I work with on an occasional project, with whom I do share some common interests.
I've made some of my best friends at work. We only occasionally do things outside of work because of other committments, but we're definitely good buddies while we're at the office.
I used to when I was younger, but not as much any more. In fact, I've recently dialed back on my friendliness at work and keep things pretty professional. It's a job, keep it a job.
This pretty much sums it up for me, although I'm a white guy, not a white woman. There are a few people my age here but we've got other things going on outside of work. Work is work, and besides, if you do part ways with the company those kinds of ties tend to unravel.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigDGeek
I used to befriend coworkers but I no longer do. This is more due to the changing face of IT and my own place in it.
Used to be that everyone in IT was my age or older. Now most of my coworkers are younger than I am and a greater percentage of them than ever are male and south Asian. Culturally speaking, they're incompatible as friends simply because south Asian men don't really befriend white women and vice versa. Millennials are nice enough at work but they don't seem to like hanging around old farts. There are a few people here around my age or older that I pal around with at work, but other than that I come in, do my job, and leave.
We have one young group of nurses that all graduated within two years from the same university plus a couple that met only on the job.
Maybe about 10 and they plan camping trips and Vegas get aways... it's been like this for a couple of years and are in each other's weddings, godparents for kids etc.... so there are definitely some that do... age range 25-30... none married when hired.
They also network like mad... know who is hiring, who is promoted, what other Hospitals pay...
Friends at work? Having been through several layoffs at a big corporation, there comes a time where musical chairs will interfere.
Also, we are ranked (confidential ranking) every year so your colleagues are competition which when it comes to a paycheck is not compatible with friendship.
Are you only addressing this to males? As a female, sure I've been friends with female co-workers; also male ones, so I'm not sure what the issue is here.
OP, how is that you have control over what your employees choose to do outside of work that you can "allow" them to be friends?
In my experience friendships spring up no matter what someone is "allowed" to do. Whether or not the organization has a policy against this is a different story.
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