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My ggrandparents had plenty of stories they have told me, as well. The stories go both ways, and interestingly, their stories have to do w/ Northerners who killed livestock, destroyed homes and raped both the white women AND the black women during the Civil War. Their stories are of women, both black and white, who took care of ALL the children in the community, scratching out a life from farming TOGETHER, and surviving difficulties most of us cannot fathom, while the men folk were off fighting a war that did not even need to take place, as most of our slaveholders in NC had freed their slave prior to the Civil War. It was a war NC did not even want to get into b/c we were already freeing slaves here - there are plenty of tracts showing that NC residents no longer supported the institution of slavery and saw it for the immoral practice it was.
We have been healing here in NC for more than 150 years and to suggest otherwise is WRONG WRONG WRONG. I witnessed civil rights violations. YES. But I also witnessed people of both races doing all they could to engender goodwill towards all our residents - be they poor whites or struggling blacks.
It is really infuriating to find that there are still people out there (white or black) who are determined to continue the misconceptions about the South, and lump NC into some bucket w/ every other infraction that has taken place "somewhere in the South." Take a look at our history here in NC b/f you start slinging around the rhetoric.
The thing I find so frustrating about The whole healing thing, is that there are no benchmarks. Slavery was wrong. Perhaps the most egregious transgression in the history of man. But 150 years after it has ended, and people are still (and expected to) apologizing for it. Year after year the topic of reparations comes up. Reparations to whom? I dont know a sinlge person of any race/ethnicity that has been enslaved. As long as people are made to pay for the mistakes of their ancestors, there will be no real breakthrough in race relations. When we can all collectively say "this is in the past, let's look to the future", we will all be further ahead.
Please dont think I'm trying to minimalize slavery. It was a terrible thing. But we cant continue to make it an issue in perpetuity, and hope to advance as a people.
Slavery has been around since the dawn of man, and is still present in the world today especially in many areas of Africa. It was not a unique Southern attribute. America is the land of opportunity. Nowhere else can a person land on its shores with nothing but the clothes on their back, and with ingenuity, hard work, and determination, create their own destiny. I have had the pleasure to know several such people, landing here without even being able to speak English, who have become extremely successful - America works.
If the Jacksons and Sharptons of the world wish to make a real difference, let them embark on a campaign of ridding the globe on slavery.
IMHO, other than stirring up discord, which maintaining their own power requires, their jobs are pretty much done here.
My father's old business partner was a Jewish gentlemen (this was 60s-70s).
He and his wife fled Nazi Germany in 1938 and were only allowed to leave with their clothes, one bag, and the equivalent of a few dollars in their pocket. Once he showed me pictures of the estate he had to leave behind, lost wealth. stolen from them. His parents died in the camps as did most of his siblings.
He was never bitter, always the optimist with the twinkle in his eye.
As a child I once asked how he could drive a Mercedes since they were so involved in the war effort.
His reply was that they made the best car in the world, and what happened in the past was just that: the past.
I only bring this up as it is quite relevant to the idea of punishing companies, or repatriations.
This man was a mentor to me and died more successful in terms of material wealth in this town, than I will ever hope to achieve.
He always chose to press onward and not relish in the unfairness of life.
Any of you who have read my posts should know I see Charlotte as the New South, and am interested in seeing people come here - and collectively - we grow together. Add your customs, traditions and activities to ours. Let's become something new together.
However, the discussion about Southerners being small-minded and not open to change. Well, that ticks me off. And I will tell you why. I am all for adding more variety here . . . for people celebrating their own culture, should they be from somewhere else . . . I even participate in those celebrations. However, the bottom line is . . . why do people from other parts of this country find they need to make it their mission to come here to NC and disparage who we are here? That is what makes me angry and that is why newcomers get labeled Damn Yankees. If you love where you are from and you think we are all small-minded yokels "down here," DO NOT COME.
If you decide to come here, YES, bring your new traditions. I am interested in learning about them. But too often, part of those TRADITIONS is a stereotypical, smug, condescending view of Southerners.
I am not in the business of insulting other people and I know that what we have all posted here are ideas . . .and so I do not mean to offend anyone w/ my statements. But I won't apologize for feeling immensely aggravated b/c people move here and then decide they are gonna "straighten out" all the "small-minded Southerners."
I am a native; my family has been here pre-Revolutionary War on both sides. We travel, we have friends from all over this country and indeed, from several spots elsewhere in the world . . . and we are neither unsophisticated nor small-minded. I take offense when these statements are bandied about.
I do not assume that all people from New York/Manhattan are loud-mouth, shrill, brash, in-your-face rude (with horrific grammar) so please don't assume all Southerners (or even the majority of them) are ignorant, unsophisticated haters. Geeeeeezzzz.
ani - carolina_guy's question about culture has indeed been an interesting foray into many people's conception of both the culture of Charlotte as a city and the general morays and folkways of the South.
Much of the perception of the South in general has been a media creation going back years. I think in a lot of ways the South has been divided up into a convienent package of two "monocultures" of black and white ( to use a farming analogy). I saw "Gone With The Wind" about six years before I spend a summer outside of Raleigh in 1973. I, as a 20 year old at the time, was expecting to see those "grand old mansions" and those kind of shacks that I had see in Robert Kennedy's tour of the South in the early 60's. Imagine my surprise when I saw that suburban Raleigh pretty much looked exactly like suburban NJ. The accents were different, the stores had different names, but for the most part, it justed seemed like "homogenized" generic America. I could go into the Spenser's gift shop in the Crabtree Mall, walk 5 feet forward and 5 feet left and put my hands on the same "lava lamp" that I could find in the exact same location in the Willowbrook Mall in Wayne NJ. A lot of my "preconceived notions" of the South "went with the wind"!
The first time I encountered "hushpuppies" (my references to them was the "shoe brand" with the sad dog logo) was in a little lunchonette where the waitress placed them down before we ordered. I was with a group of Raleigh natives. They got a good laugh out of my mistaking them for chicken macnuggets! (I myself, had though a "free entree of chicken" was awfully generous! There is a bit of a learning curve with Southern cusine! The vinegar-style barbeque was different the first time, but after a few beers, it just seems right!
Some of the worst critics of Charlotte are home grown! Those Raleigh guys always told me that Charlotte - well picture Bette Davis with cigarette in hand in her best southern drawl saying "What a dump". The first time I drove down here to visit friends, I kept thinking of Charlotte as a "Baltimore or a Detroit" that one should avoid at all costs. Get past it and get to Union County ASAP. You'll be safe there!
It's a shame more of "old Charlotte" itself doesn't really exist anymore, except as mini-museum pieces. Charlotte tears itself down more often than NY, Chcago and Boston could ever fathom. It's a "californicated version" of a new city, something from 1950 has acquired "historical significance". I think that creates the idea that it isn't the same to natives and that it possesses a certain "lack of history" to newcomers. See it now, before it is bulldozed for the next new thing! It's hard to get a good feel of any "southern culture" when so many traces of it are disappearing at an alarming rate.
I think a great part of the lack of knowledge about the South and its ways are also due in large part because it has become this "suburban last frontier" in just the last few decades. If the rate of growth had been much less, it might have absorbed new people into "its culture" instead of getting stampeded with so many people, bringing so much change, so quickly. I wonder if many in California felt the same way during the 50's when so many of their small towns ended up as giant suburbs in a couple of decades. Is old California culture an "oxymoron"? The South had a much smaller population and media market for much of the last century which was not a big help in spreading knowledge about it. Andy Griffith and Mayberry RFD weren't presenting a "sociological" view of southern culture and may have perpetuated the stereotypes! The South has always had literary giants, but sadly, the average person doesn't read enough anymore to make a difference in attitudes. carolina_guy's anger about any "lack of respect" for what he perceives to be his culture may simply be more of a "lack of knowledge" about it than any real hostility towards it!
Finally, it simply fascinates me that people are so concerned with their culture. I suspect if you went back 400 years in time ani, that you, I and carolina_guy might have a few relatives in common. I tend to think of myself as a "culture of one". While I certainly respect the achievements of my forebearers, I really can't identify with them any more. My great-grandmother's recipes for whatever might have tasted great, but I'm never going to make any of them. My idea of "cooking" is microwaving or finding a menu in the drawer. My grandfather would have been flummoxed trying to diagnose a computer problem. To me, "culture" is kind of a nostalgic look at the past and I tend to be waiting for someone to invent the future at a pace more to my liking! I think I even have a "cultural gap" with my siblings! But in time, we all adjust to everything whether we want to or not.
I don't have time to write everything I wish, but just wanted to say thanks to all of my friends who have explained further my intentions for creating this thread. To roanoke and global, you clearly have not been privy to multitude of threads that have questioned Charlotte's diversity and culture.
The point I was making in reference to the "small white towns" was that in many threads before this one, certain individuals have posted there IS NO CULTURE in these towns, just because they may be in the ethnic or racial minority. My point was to illustrate how ignorant it was.
You two have obviously not been on this board long enough to understand I would never make a racial bigotry or make claims that transplants are not welcome here--from any place!
Just like my friends have clearly pointed out, my intention was to profess that we do indeed have a culture in this area, and just because it is not YOUR culture, doesn't give you the right to dismiss ours.
So leave the politics, racial references, and ignorant rants to yourself.
Thank you for the history lesson. Whether it happened exactly like that is debatable, blacks and whites living and working together in NC, while the men went off and fought? Maybe. If it was like that we wouldn't still see the disparity between the races, that still exists.
If what you say is true, then why were my people who were owned by a family out of Eastern N.C. not freed until after the Civil War? Much of my family lives in NC still, and I have on more than one occassion experienced rampant racism all over the state of N.C. So much so that I couldn't wait to get back to Va when I was a child. Even now the thought of moving there stirs up those old feelings. I am hoping that from what my cousin says Charlotte is different.
EDITED: off topic
Unless you know the history of this State, where slavery was, indeed, quite out of favor PRIOR to the Civil War . . . please do not make assumptions.
Charlotte is different b/c NC is different . . . and NC was different PRIOR to the Civil War.
Last edited by brokensky; 07-25-2008 at 11:03 AM..
Reason: EDITED . . . off topic
How about fixing welfare so it encourages families to be together, and gets women and men more education, instead of continuing the cycle of poverty we see in this country. How about that? I think that would begin to repare the damage done to our people over the last 400 plus years.
Common Ground!
Agree.
White or Black or Hispanic, it does not matter.
It boils down to things children should learn in kindergarten:
Respect yourself.
Take responsibility for your actions.
Respect others.
Respect authority.
If everyone did those four simple things, America could be Uptopia.
I get the feeling that b/c no one has specifically addressed black culture in NC/Charlotte that the impression is - no one recognizes anything but white culture here. There is also native American culture in this state.
As to black culture in NC - here are several places to find out more:
I don't have time to write everything I wish, but just wanted to say thanks to all of my friends who have explained further my intentions for creating this thread. To roanoke and global, you clearly have not been privy to multitude of threads that have questioned Charlotte's diversity and culture.
The point I was making in reference to the "small white towns" was that in many threads before this one, certain individuals have posted there IS NO CULTURE in these towns, just because they may be in the ethnic or racial minority. My point was to illustrate how ignorant it was.
You two have obviously not been on this board long enough to understand I would never make a racial bigotry or make claims that transplants are not welcome here--from any place!
Just like my friends have clearly pointed out, my intention was to profess that we do indeed have a culture in this area, and just because it is not YOUR culture, doesn't give you the right to dismiss ours.
So leave the politics, racial references, and ignorant rants to yourself.
Oh boy, please DON'T lump me with another poster simply b/c I agreed with one statement he/she made. I replied to Kayak and emphasized that it is ignorant for people to assume something, AND I agree WITH YOU that the south has culture, my posts weren't to say there isn't any culture in the south, but to give insight on why the question keeps popping up.
Last edited by SunnyKayak; 07-25-2008 at 11:38 AM..
Reason: off topic
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