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Also, many times certain folks will do something disrespectful or bone headed and get called out for it or gets the Stink-Eye, however, they can;t admit they did anything or refuse to accept that they acted wrong , so they blame it on the only thing that is outside their control and thats their skin color.
They are yapping loudly on their cell phone in a sacred place (similar to yaking on a cell phone in a church) and people express their dismay. It's nott heir yaking onthe cell phone cause thats what they can control, so they say its their skin color because they can;t control that.
They drive like they are on the mainland and nearly run Auntie over, people get upset and tell them so. Its it their driving which was under their control? No, it's nott hem so ti had to be their race!
When you hear people talk aboutt he race problem an stuff, ask them to give the details and after a while you will learn when race was a real issue or when race is the excuse for bad behavior.
It's funny because i just got back from the library and there was some lady yapping on her cell phone the entire time being very rude and my wife says, "i'm giving her the stink eye hard right now"
My wife already has a call into the supervisor in the Kona facility and she has a coworker who has been there several times on short term work basis that is going to help get her a 2-3 week assignment.
Things are looking positive we'll atleast get a few weeks vacation if nothing else.
Another question, are there any programs or groups for things like snorkling, fishing, hiking, etc. for newcomers to get acquainted to the Hawaiian lifestyle?
At that website, I found this link about a family who moved to Kona with 2 young kids (pre-k and 1st grade). The first link is their practical how-to website, the other their blog of experiences:
The posts about school should be particularly relevant (seems to be going well for their kids, though I didn't read everything).
Echoing what everybody else said: you definitely need to visit. Going for your wife's work would be ideal, because it's mostly paid for that way, and it gives you a much better idea of life in Hawaii as opposed to visiting as a tourist. PLUS, your wife can see if it's a place she'd want to work permanantly--a big issue if hers is the anchor job.
About racism: there are some scary things on this board, some true some exaggerated. So it's a good thing you didn't react based on just your worries from reading those old threads. In comment #16, hotzcatz describes exactly my experiences with "racism" and its many forms, and adds some great examples of how sitations are perceived differently from each side.
But then you wrote: "The things you are talking about and what some mainland people consider racism is what i like to call "rude". Those behaviors are what we are trying to get away from. I know it's everywhere and you can't escape it completely, but i thought it interesting you describe what some look at racism as what i look at as rude. Not trying to point someone out on here, but those are things we can live with. Hence my original post about living a slower lifestyle so to speak."
What do you consider rude in hotzcatz's example? Is it the people chatting while others wait or the person in line who thinks he's being discriminated against? It sounds like you mean the former, but in that case you still have the wrong attitude. Yes, the worker who is talking to his friend is holding up the whole line, but those two people are just doing what they've always done, taking time to chat with friends. They probably went to high school together (think about it, most of the locals of the same age in a given area probably went to the same high school). They've been stopping to chat for 10, 20, or more years, from before the neighbor islands got so built up and crowded and full of mainlanders moving over and causing lines. And the locals standing in line, they aren't upset, they're probably talking to their neighbor (in line and in their neighborhood--you always run in to neighbors all over town).
What is actually rude is the person who doesn't perceive local customs. Say you tolerate the wait, and then it's your turn at the window. Not wanting to make the people behind you wait, you speak quickly and get your business done as fast as possible. Even if you spoke in a friendly way, that was rude. You were so rushed, you probably forgot to say hi or thank you. Or if you didn't, you didn't really respond to the teller's friendly chit chat.
"Living a slower life" is not just tolerating people you think are being rude for wasting your time. How ironic that you think living a slower life is to put up with people who are genuinely living a slower life. To really live a slower life, you need to accept it to the point where it seems normal to you that those 2 people are talking and you don't even feel like it is holding you up.
Same thing about driving: it's not just about driving 5 or 10 miles slower (and trying not to grumble about it). It is truly about not being in such a hurry and not caring when you arrive (hey, island time). Of course, there are times you care about being on time, but then you anticipate and leave earlier--you don't count on getting on the freeway in the fast lane, because there is no freeway, and you'll be stuck behind a driver living the slow life.
Don't get me wrong, there are rude people here, and as mentioned, they are more likely to be the transplants, but some locals can be rude too--it's human nature. But the appropriate response is "whatevahs" (whatever, indifference, like water off a duck's back).
It's funny because i just got back from the library and there was some lady yapping on her cell phone the entire time being very rude and my wife says, "i'm giving her the stink eye hard right now"
My wife already has a call into the supervisor in the Kona facility and she has a coworker who has been there several times on short term work basis that is going to help get her a 2-3 week assignment.
Things are looking positive we'll atleast get a few weeks vacation if nothing else.
Another question, are there any programs or groups for things like snorkling, fishing, hiking, etc. for newcomers to get acquainted to the Hawaiian lifestyle?
That's great that you may get a chance to spend 2-3 weeks in Hawaii - mostly at your wife's employer's expense.
Take time to look around for possible housing and where you may find employment.
And don't forget to let us all know how you make out with your trip.
My wife already has a call into the supervisor in the Kona facility and she has a coworker who has been there several times on short term work basis that is going to help get her a 2-3 week assignment.
Since you are thinking about moving to Hawai'i, might I suggest that you set up a budget, like the one you will be living on if you move there, and stick to it. Anyplace you go will seem better than it is if you are eating out for every meal, and doing a bunch of tourist activities. Also, try to sleep in the area close to where you will be living. If you are waking up every morning to an ocean front view, yet you can't afford that when you move there, might change your feelings a bit.
Since you are thinking about moving to Hawai'i, might I suggest that you set up a budget, like the one you will be living on if you move there, and stick to it. Anyplace you go will seem better than it is if you are eating out for every meal, and doing a bunch of tourist activities. Also, try to sleep in the area close to where you will be living. If you are waking up every morning to an ocean front view, yet you can't afford that when you move there, might change your feelings a bit.
Now thats some sound advice. You got to try and live the way you will be living so you can get an honest feeling about what things are like. There is no way your going to get a feeling if staying at a ocean front hotel suite and if you relocate, you'll be in some small house way back up the volcano.
Here's something I was told to do, (and I didn;t) and that is to make a shopping list of the items yuo buy on the mainland as "normal" purchases over a month. if you normally buy certain groceries, list them. If you every month buy TP and laundry soap, list them. But also indicate if they are purcahses you make even if not on sale or a special. So if you buy apple juice and normally may pick one brand up if on sale but if none on sale you still will buy one list that item as a normal purchase. You can also list the luxuaries you buy somewhat regualarly because they are on sale but if above a certain price, you do without.
next start a list of normal purchaes you make including if every week you stop for a starbucks on fridays, or you pick up that soda and chip during your saturady home improvement store run. What are prucahses you make every week without really thinking of the cost because the cost is low enough it just gets absorbed into your spending.
When you come to hawaii for the visit, go to the stores and compare the prices. If its an item you buy regardless if on sale or not, jot down the regular price on hawaii. If it's a item you only buy on sale and won;t buy if over a certain amount, indicate what the best sale proce you found it for on Hawaii on Hawaii. Do the same for your casual purchase you really don;t think about.
What is the price of gasoline?
How much does a sheet set cost?
Is the toner the same for the printer as you normally pay?
How much gas will you need to get to sams club or Costco, or Home Depot, macy's, McDonalds or the drug store, or.....
This will at least give you an honest comparrision of cost and you will honestly know what adjustment you may want to make.
So we are coming in May for 2 weeks. My wife has accepted the job for 2 weeks and we'll be there. All the details are still being finalized, so i don't know where exactely they'll have us staying.
What i hope to do is live like we would if we actually lived there. We will shop and cook our meals most days. I want to check out the local markets and the real estate. We won't be buying, but looking for long term rentals, ie: 6 months or more. So i have more questions....
#1. Can someone give me a few respectable rental agencies i can speak with over the phone before our visit and meet with while we are there? The internet is loaded with them and i don't know who to trust. It will be my wife and I and our 9 year old son. As i mentioned earlier, we want something small and nothing fancy. Just safe and nice. Looking for a house and not an apartment or condo. Small 2 bedroom is perfectly ok with us. We plan to have an estate sell and get ride of most of our stuff here so something furnished would be a plus.
#2. Traveling. We are debating if we move on whether to bring our cars or sell them here. I've really been thinking about something like a moped or riding my bike. Obviously this would depend on where we would live compared to our jobs. My question is, do alot of people bike or ride mopeds for transportation? And is it safe? I live in Denver which is a huge biking city, but no way would i get out on most public streets on my bike. Bikers are hit and killed all the time around here. How is it around Kona?
#3. Are the farmers markets open daily or just weekends? Is there some links to the markets where we could see the locations and what the vendors offer?
Thanks again for the tips. Things are moving forward.
And that definitely is a consideration to be honest even if my wife and I haven't discussed it. But how is the water temps in that part of Cali? My wife wants to be in the ocean year round.
I live in San Diego half year and Hawaii the other half.
I love to swim, but don't EVER go in the ocean in San Diego. Too cold.
What i hope to do is live like we would if we actually lived there. We will shop and cook our meals most days. I want to check out the local markets and the real estate.
Don;t do that. You have too much to reserach to spend the time cooking and shopping. All you need is a list of items you normally buy and the price you pay, just write down what's the cost on Hawaii. Cooking is cooking so enjoy the ability to try many local dishes at various places instead of cooking over a stove. This will also give you a chance to see what local items can make other dishes, but don't waste the time cooking for yourself.
get sense of where you'll be working and travel distances to various places. Many times people want to do certain things that attract them to Hawaii, but they can;t afford to live where those things are so they move further awy. The further away, the longer the trip to enjoy which could mean you aren not doing what you thought as often as you like. That can be a downer on some.
Look over some of the smaller overlooked things like cost of certain furnitures and other household items. Walk through the big name stores and make sure you understand what is normal merchandise often carried and normally in stock, and what are the items you may be use to seeing, but are nowhere to be found.
When looking at stores an dsuch, if you go to a couple, see what items appear in low supply over the trip, There are times when certain items are not stiocked like ont he mainland but can be a high demand item one day. So yuo need to know what may be gone when you get to the store.
One thing you can do is while there, monitor how you are using the air conditioner. Why did you turn it one? Were you comfortable in places with no a/c or would you had turned it on if you controlled it?
Spend some time looking at where all places you want to go normally are located compared to where you might live. As I said above, you will be surprised how distance and location can chnage your dreams of activities to the relity of what you will be able to do ona regualr basis.
That should be enough stuff to keep you busy, and my main point is, you don;t need to spend time on household duites when your time in limited and best spent on research.
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