Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Bergen County, specifically Rutherford, was mentioned in 2 different replies. While I think Rutherford is possibly your best bet, you might want to look at Kearny (in Hudson County) and North Arlington (Bergen).
There are some truly great homes in The Manor and Arlington section of Kearny that would suit your needs, although I don't know about the rental situation these days. Roosevelt Elementary School historically was the best of the K-6 schools although I don't know how it fares these days. Kearny has a main street - Kearny Ave which is almost all stores - all 3 miles of it. Then down on Passaic Ave (natives call it River Rd), there are several mini-malls and big stores. Kearny has waterfront park and many medium to small parks/playgrounds scattered around the town with a large park on the border with Harrison - West Hudson Park.
It was a great place to grow up and a good place to begin raising my children before an out-of-state move.
Commuting to midtown Manhattan from Kearny used to be a short trip - either a bus to Harrison (Path trains) or an express bus direct to 42nd st. It's an alternative to consider.
If I were you, I'd experiment with public transportation OTHER than NJ Transit. You won't know until you try.
Drive to the Harrison PATH station one day and see how that feels for you. The PATH train ride to 33rd Street and Sixth Ave. is under 35 minutes, including the "transfer" at Journal Square, and I put "transfer" in quotes, because it amounts to getting off the PATH train and walking 5 paces across the platform to another open PATH train that's already waiting there. The PATH trains also run every 5-10 minutes during rush hour, by the way. So if you miss one, it's never a big deal. It goes by really fast. Once you're at the 33rd Street PATH station, it's quicker to navigate to the subways and it's not as big of a schidt show as Penn Station. Or you can take the PATH train 20 minutes to the World Trade Center instead (no transfers...one straight shot) and take the E train to 50th & Eighth Ave. You have a lot of flexibility with the PATH.
If you find that you don't mind the PATH train, you can consider a town that's a closer/easier drive to Harrison, which is the best choice of PATH station if you are coming from Essex/Morris Counties. So basically any town that has easy access to Route 280.
Also consider towns that have express buses into Port Authority (Lincoln Tunnel has dedicated bus lanes so the ride isn't as bad as you might think). Also, Port Authority is much more convenient to 50th & Eighth. And, again, IMO, PA is easier to deal with than the schidt show that is Penn Station. And you don't have to worry about any transfers with commuter buses.
Some one mentioned working from home as a loose possibility for the future. See if you can't make that happen right now. At least a couple days a week. More and more companies are offering work-from-home as a perk. It's just a matter of your employer being willing to set up the logistics. (Which they CAN, it's 2014 for crissake...it's must a matter of whether or not they are willing.) Do you HAVE to physically be in the office all 5 days of the week? Like most white collar office jobs, isn't the majority of your business done on a computer, over a network/internet, and phone? I don't know what your day-to-day is like as a lawyer, but I know all kinds of people who work from home...finance people, IT people, HR people, Big Pharma people, sales people, administrative people. What I find hilarious is that a lot of companies will outsource huge chunks of operations where offshore employees are working remotely, but domestic employees are not given the privilege to work remotely. (Unless there is a blizzard or some other weather event where you can't make it into the office because all public transportation has rolled over and died, and then somehow, miraculously, your employer says it IS possible for you to work from home. ) Can you at least negotiate to work from home a couple of days a week?
Another idea to consider is changing your hours a bit. Sounds like you work a 9 to 5. If you did an 8 to 4, it might make the commute easier in terms of traffic and time. I personally found the roads/trains/buses for an 8-to-4 commute to be more peaceful than for a 9-to-5 commute.
Good luck to you. I had a 2 hour commute to the Grand Central area. I know how it is.
You will find another way that works better for you.
Wait...are you offering? I get why you'd want to be married to a wealthy, successful lawyer, but it is poor form to turn this forum into your personal hunting ground for a sugar momma. And aren't you getting a little long in the tooth for that game? Time to hang it up, man. You are too old to be anybody's sugar baby. Anyway, she's a lawyer. Prenup would be airtight.
Wait...are you offering? I get why you'd want to be married to a wealthy, successful lawyer, but it is poor form to turn this forum into your personal hunting ground for a sugar momma. And aren't you getting a little long in the tooth for that game? Time to hang it up, man. You are too old to be anybody's sugar baby. Anyway, she's a lawyer. Prenup would be airtight.
if im gonna have a sugar momma then she needs to be able to spend more than 600k on a house. im gonna want a nice big theater type room, indoor pool, Maserati and more!
I love this thread, a lot of folks in this forum trashes NJ towns that are far more convenient for you especially with transportation in favor of towns that are much further away. Just last week a guy argued that New Brunswick is a great place to live and is "close" to NYC for less than 1 hour.
So much misinformation from people trying to give props to their home town and not give actual factual accounts.
I hate to say this but anywhere south of Rahway or further West than Cranford you need to prepare for 1hour+ commute with NJTransit. And you have folks saying oh the commute is less than an hour, give me break.
I live in Union and my commute to NY ranges from 37-50min and I'm much much closer than Westfield.
Njtransit today has a 10-15min delay this morning around 8am and that's not too bad consider once every week or two there's a 30-60min delay. in the morning going to NYC or coming back.
Agreed! Someone finally said it. Funny thing is, I'm usually hesitant to recommend Cranford (where I'm from/live) to people looking to commute to the city and live in a nice suburban town because I know there are closer places to the city, like for example places on the NEC line not the RVL which makes for a quicker commute without train transfers, but you're right about the west of Cranford/south of Rahway thing. That kind of is the cutoff for a "good" commute.
Open to suggestions as to what I am doing wrong and how to improve it: I walk out of my door at 7:15a (nanny arrives at 7am, she works from 7a-7p). Pull out of the driveway a few min later (back out, shut garage door, wait for traffic to pull out). Takes about 10 min to get to the Westfield train station. Have to get there before 7:30 or I have no chance at all of getting a daily spot (and each day it seems I need to be there earlier). Catch the 7:39, which generally comes closer to 7:45. The scheduled arrival time is 8:32, but it hasn't been earlier than 8:40-45. Race off train, through crowds to get to uptown C/E platform, wait a few minutes to get on train, then arrive at 50th/8th at a couple minutes before 9 am, and arrive at my desk at the earliest 9 am (today was 9:15 due to delays on NJT). Return trip, I typically leave office at 5:15 to catch the 5:35, scheduled arrival time is 6:28 but generally arrives closer to 6:40, drive home, get there around 6:50-7 depending on how much of a delay there has been on the train (so yes, the return trip can be a bit shy of 1h45m on a good day).
My thread is not complaining about how bad the commute is - it's trying to seek advice from people who have lived here for longer than my 3.5 weeks, to see if/how I can improve my situation. If I can't, I will explore other areas as well, although I believe I am priced out of what I am looking for in Westchester, am not sure it really exists on LI, and believe nothing in CT will be close enough. But thanks for your helpful post (and you too, CaptainNJ, for the helpful comment about how I "need to find a husband").
Sorry I didn't mean to come off so critical, my question wasn't so much aimed at the OP as the forum in general. I asked about other areas because I honestly don't know as much about them.
I'm feeling quite discouraged and am hoping you all may have some ideas. I have been pouring over threads here for months and a little while back, I posted about where to move in NJ (Coming back to area - am I missing towns to consider? ). To recap, I'm a single parent, mid-40s professional, with 2 young kids with me full time (ages 6 and 3). I'm from LI originally but lived in Manhattan for about 20 years before a brief move to Philadelphia, then came back here for a job in the city (midtown west, 50th and 8th). I wound up renting a house in Westfield and moved in a few weeks ago.
In short, the commute is killing me, and leaves me with no time to see my kids (15 min in the morning, barely an hour at night). I leave at 7:15a and get home at 7p and have a 1 hr 45 min MINIMUM door to door, sometimes longer. Between racing to the Westfield lot to get a spot, dealing with the change at Newark (I am shocked at how awful that is), battling the crowds at both Penn Stations, and there always being delays, it's grueling. And as the sole parent, it is just too much time out of the house.
The tradeoff, in theory, is the great Westfield schools and community. So far, I like Westfield ok, but I'm kind of underwhelmed. Parking everywhere is ridiculous (battling for spots at the library?!?), wait lists for everything (train station parking, pool, etc). The downtown is great in theory, but the reality is that I won't really be driving to town to stroll about on a leisurely Sunday popping into cute stores with a 3 and 6 yo. I have done some errands on the weekends in the neighboring towns (mostly big box stores) and have found the surrounding areas to be gritty, run-down feeling and crowded.
When I try to break down the components of what is making me most unhappy, I was thinking having a direct train ride in would be a huge help, and with a ride as much under 45 min as possible. If I could get my door to door commute consistently down to 1 hr and 15 min that would make a huge difference.
Also thinking being in a less urban/densely populated area might help. Walkable downtown/town center probably not necessary. I more need convenience to stores/places to run errand. I would still like there to be lots of close by activities for my kids to get involved in.
For schools, while I would love "great" I think I have to take it down a notch from Westfield (or Summit or Millburn level) to "very good" schools.
Budget - originally wanted to stay between $500-600k for a house, can revise it up to $675k if I have to but want taxes below $12k.
I'm feeling pretty despondent, like there is just no good way to make NJ work for me and my family. I know what I am looking for is likely impossible, just figured I would try to make sure I have really explored all my options. I honestly don't know where else to go - I don't think I can afford the taxes in Westchester, and really don't want to live on Long Island again, and I don't think there's a miracle option in either of those communities either. And I don't want city living again (can't afford it either).
Anyway, thanks for reading, and for any thoughts you might have :-)
For starters, I wish you the best - I can only imagine all the work you have to do in and out of the home as a single mom of two.
The person who callously posted the "get a husband" line was offensive, but let's be blunt - suburban living + single parenting + commute into midtown from the suburbs = a tough life. There's this Westfield divorce attorney office and whenever I drive by, I never see anyone inside and I wonder how the lawyer stays in business. Now of course with any town of 30,000 people odds are there will be plenty of divorces, but I know very few single parents in WF. Most families in Westfield have three children, if not four. I don't mind commuting into the city from WF one bit. The other dads on the train have no problem doing it. Yet, if my wife wasn't around to do all the hard work in the home, I'd be in Hoboken if not Manhattan. I would want to live someplace where I could find other single parents, and Westfield is just not that place.
Other posters who like to push their towns (it's ok, I like to do the same) are recommending towns just as far if not further. Moving to Madison or Berkeley Heights won't do anything for your commute. Personality wise, Ridgewood is the Westfield of Bergen County. If you must insist on a suburb, maybe one of the Essex county suburbs on the midtown line would save you some time, but they won't save you any money. Your budget will be tough in Millburn and the property taxes in Maplewood (good, not great schools) are just too much.
First tip - if you stay in WF, get a rental near the train station.
Personally I don't mind switching at Newark because I'm not one to sit still and I don't mind a short trip up and down the stairs at Penn Station for the Path. As the other poster said, take the express bus to Port Authority.
Have you made any WF friends yet? Join the Newcomers club, if not your church. Is your six year old still in Kindergarten? We made more friends via the elementary school (Since WF doesn't offer full day K, everyone's got their kids in all different schools all around town.)
But I don't understand some things about your post - the pool wait list is only one summer. Westfielders love its library, as evidenced by the special library tax, but c'mon - if there's no parking, just park half a block away on the street.
You said the surrounding areas are gritty?? Huh?? Scotch Plains, Clark, Cranford, Mountainside??? There are no towns that border Westfield that are gritty. Plainfield is two towns away but you don't need to shop there. Whatever you need to buy can be found in town or within 5 miles. If you are picky and say need a costco or a sam's club over a BJs, you might need to go up to 10 miles. Route 22 has every big store you could ever need. And, no offense, but walking around with only two kids is a breeze!
We make sacrifices for our children. You won't find a better place to raise them than Westfield but I feel for you and truly wish you the best.
Open to suggestions as to what I am doing wrong and how to improve it: I walk out of my door at 7:15a (nanny arrives at 7am, she works from 7a-7p). Pull out of the driveway a few min later (back out, shut garage door, wait for traffic to pull out). Takes about 10 min to get to the Westfield train station. Have to get there before 7:30 or I have no chance at all of getting a daily spot (and each day it seems I need to be there earlier). Catch the 7:39, which generally comes closer to 7:45. The scheduled arrival time is 8:32, but it hasn't been earlier than 8:40-45. Race off train, through crowds to get to uptown C/E platform, wait a few minutes to get on train, then arrive at 50th/8th at a couple minutes before 9 am, and arrive at my desk at the earliest 9 am (today was 9:15 due to delays on NJT). Return trip, I typically leave office at 5:15 to catch the 5:35, scheduled arrival time is 6:28 but generally arrives closer to 6:40, drive home, get there around 6:50-7 depending on how much of a delay there has been on the train (so yes, the return trip can be a bit shy of 1h45m on a good day).
So why aren't you taking the bus in the morning (train pass works on the train)?
10 minutes to the train station. Since the buses some every 8 minutes at that time, average wait is 4 minutes. Even if the bus is slow and it is a hour trip, you would be at Port Authority (42nd and 8th) in 1 hr 12 minutes. Then a 13 minute walk to your office. Total time is 1 hour 25 minutes. Just save you 20 minutes in the morning.
King, i understand some of what the OP is saying, i find the traffic/congestion in Westfield center to be very annoying. I much prefer places further west with more space/less traffic. I did not recommend Brkley Heights because i live there (i do not). The OP will have to sacrifice something, and the downside to Brkley Heights is the 60-65 min train ride. However it is direct which involves less stress than changing stations, it is less crowded, it has terrific schools, she can get more house for her $ than in WF, and there's plenty of kid-oriented community stuff. It won't help on the commute but as i said something has to be sacrificed.
There have been a few posts talking about the wonders of the express bus to Port Authority. I work from home 2 days a week and I ride a bus that goes through the express bus lines at Lincoln tunnel every morning on the other three days. When everything goes well, it's not a bad commute. However, all it takes is one incident to disrupt everything. Over the past month, I have had 3 days where the bus ride took 2 hours. (I should mention I live 10 miles from the tunnel.) On one occasion, there was an accident in the express bus lane. In another incident, there was an accident in the tunnel. And other incident was nothing more than a disabled bus. Any one of these events can quickly add 30-45 min to your commute. There were several other occasions where there were massive delays this past month, but luckily I worked from home those days. Sometimes the delays are so bad, they have to route the buses to Secaucus to drop everyone off at the train station. But if your bus is already too far into the trip, Secaucus is no longer an option and you're forced to sit there. (As for the guy quoting 40 min from East Brunswick to Port Authority, I have to raise my eyebrows at that figure.)
If you have to be at your desk at a specific time, the bus can be maddening because you need to account for additional time in case there's a delay and frankly, there's always a delay getting into NYC. I won't even get into what happens when it snows. I am very luckily that I can for the most part work from home whenever I like, so I simply don't attempt to go in on days with inclement weather. I also can start may day whenever I like and don't have a hard start time, so the bus is the lesser of two evils for me. Commuting into NYC is very difficult and aggravating. Best of luck to you.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
) Can you at least negotiate to work from home a couple of days a week?
I get why you'd want to be married to a wealthy, successful lawyer, but it is poor form to turn this forum into your personal hunting ground for a sugar momma. And aren't you getting a little long in the tooth for that game? Time to hang it up, man. You are too old to be anybody's sugar baby. Anyway, she's a lawyer. Prenup would be airtight.
