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Yes, I agree. You can't force your personal beliefs onto your children. I do not have children but could not image disowning them being a child disowned by a parent. Even being disowned, unconditional love remains. I wish for the same.
I do wonder, does transgender relate to "doing gender" or is it merely the way one dresses?
There are several things here that can be confused for one another, so here's some definitions.
Cross-dressing- Cross dressing is a fetish in which a person feels sexually aroused by wearing the clothes of the opposite gender. A cross-dresser typically doesn't want to *become* the opposite gender, though they may role-play fantasies of such in the bedroom. But there isn't the sense that they were born in the wrong body or don't 'fit'- it's more about sexual fantasies revolving around vulnerability and the thrill of doing some thing considered taboo.
Drag- A person who dresses in drag is dressing not just as a female (or male) but as a hyper masculine/feminized version of such. A person dressing in drag may or may not be transsexual. Drag is more about the performance aspect of gender and making a statement about societal responses to transgressing it.
Transsexual- Someone who feels their gender doesn't match their biological sex. So, yes, it is about *doing* gender in that it's about more than just wearing the clothes of the opposite gender. A person who just likes the clothes aspect is a cross-dresser, not a transsexual. That said, there is a wide spectrum that falls under transsexual. You have people who leave behind their old identity completely and live full-time as the opposite sex. You have people who are comfortable living as the opposite sex in their personal life but perhaps not in their professional life. You have people who are most comfortable somewhere in the middle of gender roles or who move back and forth (gender *****.) And you have people like me, who identify mainly as not gendered at all. All of us fall under the umbrella of being transsexual- even when we're wearing the clothes considered "appropriate" to our birth gender.
I would still be transsexual even if I wore a dress daily for the rest of my life- it isn't about my outer trappings but about how I feel in my body and mind
Homosexuality is observable all over nature? Are you talking about actual sexual behavior or dominance behavior? Many confuse those two. I have two spayed females dogs and one appears to try to "ride" the other one. The dog is not homosexual. Or, is homosexual more about dominance and that is where the parallel lies? I have often wondered this after reading the types of "interactions" that involve dominance and submission, physical harm, etc. Natural? Not in my world!
With pedophilia, they don't always act on their feelings so is that OK to desire children for sexual partners, that seem OK to you? Another kind of "normal"? They are not actually physically hurting the child although some of the sickos engage in watching porn that involves children and seem to think that doesn't harm anyone. They are in line to have their needs met also and are hoping the being PC and not wanting to make them feel bad about themselves will prevail.
Don't some become part man and part woman? That normal?
There are always "norms" established and "ranges".
Homosexual behavior is observed across the whole of nature in many, many different species. If you want to dismiss it as dominance behavior, then you have to dismiss all heterosexual behavior as well. If an animal becomes aroused during homosexual behavior or non-reproductive behavior (which is also very common), then it makes no sense to dismiss it anymore than you would dismiss opposite sex behavior. Some individuals show only same-sex behavior. In some species almost all individuals engage in bisexual behavior, including the *higher* species like dolphins and chimps.
And in fact, transsexual individuals occur in nature as well. All the time.
Pedophilia is sexual thoughts directed toward individuals who by definition cannot consent. If you can't tell the difference between that and behavior between consenting adults, you're the one with the issue. There is no difference between comparing same-sex behavior to pedophilia and comparing heterosexual behavior to pedophilia- it makes just as much sense, which is absolutely none.
BTW...do you realize you have no idea what sex you are? You assume that you do because you were assigned one at birth and you've been playing that part since. But unless you have had a chromosomal analysis done, you don't actually know for sure...there are many chromosomal patterns outside the 'norm' and in many cases a person lives and dies without knowing it. That's interesting because it shows how much of a construct gender really is- most people never question for a second that they are a 'boy' or a 'girl' when 1:1000 male births actually has a xxy karyotype and many never show symptoms. You yourself could be intersexed or transsexual....scary, ain't it?
Oh, you're also assuming that 'normal' means 'good'. Guess what? I am weird...really, super weird. I wouldn't know normal if it bit me on the butt and offered me a 9-5 job and 2.5 kids. Yet I still manage to be awesome every second of the day.
I don't want to be normal. I'd much rather be me because again...awesomeness is happening over here. Moreover, I can't see what 'morals' have to do with my genitals or clothing. Morals =/= fitting in or toeing gender lines. At least from my perspective, morals have to do with being a good person, striving to help others and not harm them, and taking care of my own space and responsibilities.
I am curious about the issue of parents with transgender children. Especially parents that are used to traditional gender roles. As a parent, how would you react to your son, who is in his early 20's, wanting to act on his transgender desires? Would it be accepted by you or would you disown him?
Are you suggesting they be loved less?
You could pose the same question about Gays or Lesbians.
Someday I hope we all can get beyond this... Life is too short.
I am curious for those that said they would just accept it, would you question why or just accept? Would just think that's just how they are or dig into why they feel or think that way?
I do not have any children, however, if I did I would not approve, but that does not mean I would disown them.
I am curious for those that said they would just accept it, would you question why or just accept? Would just think that's just how they are or dig into why they feel or think that way?
I do not have any children, however, if I did I would not approve, but that does not mean I would disown them.
Parents don't have to accept their child's choices on sexuality whether they are transgender, homsexual or bi.
BUT they do have to respect how that child feels.
Obviously for kids under 18, parents aren't going to purchase clothes for the opposite sex, but if your child is gay or bi you have to respect that.
Parents don't have to accept their child's choices on sexuality whether they are transgender, homsexual or bi.
BUT they do have to respect how that child feels.
Obviously for kids under 18, parents aren't going to purchase clothes for the opposite sex, but if your child is gay or bi you have to respect that.
Many parents DO allow their transgendered child to wear clothes of the opposite gender. Unless you meant a parent who is uncomfortable won't, in which case yes, that's likely. Which is highly unfortunate and no different from refusing to allow a gay child to bring their same-sex partner home to meet their parents.
What does respect mean in that context? I respect you- so long as I don't have to see any evidence of how 'different' you are? That's not respect by any definition I know and it certainly isn't compassion. I honestly think a parent who behaves like this does more harm to the child because it causes a confusion between love and pain. "Mom says she loves me and respects me...she just doesn't want to really know who I am or allow me freedom to express that person." It keeps the child tied to the parent longer than with a parent who is honest and upfront about their own bigoted nature.
Many parents DO allow their transgendered child to wear clothes of the opposite gender. Unless you meant a parent who is uncomfortable won't, in which case yes, that's likely. Which is highly unfortunate and no different from refusing to allow a gay child to bring their same-sex partner home to meet their parents.
What does respect mean in that context? I respect you- so long as I don't have to see any evidence of how 'different' you are? That's not respect by any definition I know and it certainly isn't compassion. I honestly think a parent who behaves like this does more harm to the child because it causes a confusion between love and pain. "Mom says she loves me and respects me...she just doesn't want to really know who I am or allow me freedom to express that person." It keeps the child tied to the parent longer than with a parent who is honest and upfront about their own bigoted nature.
What I mean by respect is that we don't disrespect our children's decision when it comes to situations like this.
When I first started working, one of my co-workers suspected her son was gay and one day he came forward and told her, he was either 15 or 16. She accepted, his father on the other hand would call him names and homosexual slurs, which I consider a disrespectful act.
Parents don't have to accept their child's choices on sexuality whether they are transgender, homsexual or bi.
BUT they do have to respect how that child feels.
Obviously for kids under 18, parents aren't going to purchase clothes for the opposite sex, but if your child is gay or bi you have to respect that.
. . .but would you question why? Is it just as easy as okay I don't like it, but you are my child and I love you regardless, or would you also want to know why they feel or think as they do?
. . .but would you question why? Is it just as easy as okay I don't like it, but you are my child and I love you regardless, or would you also want to know why they feel or think as they do?
Would you question a heterosexual person as to why the like the opposite sex?
I don't think I'd question something like that, it's all about how you feel.
What I mean by respect is that we don't disrespect our children's decision when it comes to situations like this.
When I first started working, one of my co-workers suspected her son was gay and one day he came forward and told her, he was either 15 or 16. She accepted, his father on the other hand would call him names and homosexual slurs, which I consider a disrespectful act.
But it's equally disrespectful not to allow your child to dress in a way that feels comfortable to them, or to refuse to allow them to do an activity that isn't generally accepted for their gender. A parent's respect (or lack thereof) is in their actions just as much as their words. A parent who refuses to address their child by their preferred pronoun, for example, IS being disrespectful, hurtful, and cruel, no matter how they frame it.
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They are in line to have their needs met also and are hoping the being PC and not wanting to make them feel bad about themselves will prevail. 
