Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I really despise my inlaws. Problems stemmed from my being of different religion from my husband, their son. They didn't want us to get married, etc., caused lots of heartache the weeks leading up to our wedding. Over the past 10 years, our relationship has been strained and basically disintegrated this summer when they blew up at me (extreme profanity) for no reason. My husband was present and can't figure out what happened.
From the very beginning, my mom told me that my mother in law would be a problem for the rest of my life.
Anyway, I don't want them near my kids, yet my husband doesn't want to keep our kids from their grandparents. I just don't think they deserve to be in our lives because of their behavior. I'm not saying not to talk to them again, but I would like to limit visits to twice a year or something. They aren't bad people, they are just inconsiderate, very one sided, etc.
Your husband should stand up to his parents and tell them it is not acceptable to 'blow up' at you. They are his parents and when you married him - you got them too.
You will regret it if you keep your children from their grandparents. Your children deserve to know both grandparents (unless they are abusive, etc.).
I too married someone of a different religion and I did not get along with them either. They were condescending and manipulative (to me) but good grandparents. Looking back, I wish I had tried harder to include them for the sake of the children. Don't make my mistake.
If not, just have your husband take the kids to visit them every once in a while, or arrange to be out of the house if they come over. Unless they are spewing general hate speech, they should see the grandkids. You just don't have to participate.
If they were THAT resistant to you, they won't go to family therapy. Mainly they see you as the problem, so why would they go to therapy to fix something they don't see as broken? I doubt they feel any accountability for the problems in the relationship.
You have to do what is best for your children. It is not good if they are running you down in the children's presence....Nor if they are abusive or use bad language. IMO Your husband needs to lay down the law regarding these issues....abuse is not acceptable...period, I meant lay down the law regarding verbalizing anything negative about you to the children.
Do they do or say anything to your kids that would be damaging to them? If not, I wouldn't keep them apart. I have issues with my in-law's and I don't go out of my way to see them, but I don't purposely keep the kids away either.
I really despise my inlaws. Problems stemmed from my being of different religion from my husband, their son. They didn't want us to get married, etc., caused lots of heartache the weeks leading up to our wedding. Over the past 10 years, our relationship has been strained and basically disintegrated this summer when they blew up at me (extreme profanity) for no reason. My husband was present and can't figure out what happened.
From the very beginning, my mom told me that my mother in law would be a problem for the rest of my life.
Anyway, I don't want them near my kids, yet my husband doesn't want to keep our kids from their grandparents. I just don't think they deserve to be in our lives because of their behavior. I'm not saying not to talk to them again, but I would like to limit visits to twice a year or something. They aren't bad people, they are just inconsiderate, very one sided, etc.
Hmmm... Not one mention on whether or not your in-laws love your children or how they treat their grandchildren. I'm guessing they're normal, loving grandparents or you would have started by saying, "My inlaws hate my kids and it's breaking my heart." You started with, "I really despise my inlaws". (So this is about you. Not about them. Get it? They just have to love your kids. Not you.)
How many people do your kids have in their lives who love them? So many that they can afford to loose two?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
