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The back story is that my husband and I are forced to move out of a 3 bedroom, two story condominium with a full basement and a 2 car garage into a 2 bedroom apartment with a small storage room. The new place is about 60% the size of our old place (but we can pay a small amount for an extra storage which would make it about 70%). We have gotten rid of hundreds of books, numerous book shelves and several large pieces of furniture.
Downsizing has been going fairly well with one snag. I saved many of our children's favorite toys. Not huge, huge boxes of them but perhaps three bankers boxes for each child of the nicest, favorite toys from baby toys to preteen toys. I only saved clean, unbroken toys. Sometimes I used these toys when I tutored children or when I babysat but my main goal was to have a bunch of nice toys for my grandchildren to use when the visited.
My son (age 32, father of two) and daughter (age 28, unmarried) said that they were their toys and that they had the right to throw them all away before we downsize into an apartment.
My son, just dumped almost a completely full box of Jurassic Park dinosaurs, jeeps and other accessories right into the garbage! They were clean & non-broken. My son has not even lived at our house in 14 years. Now, I do not even have one dinosaur or jeep to play with when my male grandson visits (who loves dinosaurs) nor any of those toys for when my grandnephews visit (who also love dinosaurs). I would occasionally also use those toys during tutoring sessions as reinforces.
I was just flabbergasted! I could easily store those toys on a top shelf and only get them out when we have visitors. They certainly aren't going to be taking up variable floor space.
My son and daughter are insistent that they are their toys and they have the right to throw them away.
So CD readers? What do you think? Do my adult children have the right to throw away toys from my house that they have not used for 20 years but I still use several times a year (and hope to use more now that I have grandchildren?
The back story is that my husband and I are forced to move out of a 3 bedroom, two story condominium with a full basement and a 2 car garage into a 2 bedroom apartment with a small storage room. The new place is about 60% the size of our old place (but we can pay a small amount for an extra storage which would make it about 70%).
Downsizing has been going fairly well with one snag. I saved many of our children's favorite toys. Not huge, huge boxes of them but perhaps three bankers boxes for each child of the nicest, favorite toys from baby toys to preteen toys. I only saved clean, unbroken toys. Sometimes I used these toys when I tutored children or when I babysat but my main goal was to have a bunch of nice toys for my grandchildren to use when the visited.
My son (age 32, father of two) and daughter (age 28, unmarried) said that they were their toys and that they had the right to throw them all away before we downsize into an apartment.
My son, just dumped about completely full box of Jurassic Park dinosaurs, jeeps and other accessories right into the garbage! They were clean & non-broken. Now, I do not even have one dinosaur or jeep to play with when my male grandson visits (who loves dinosaurs) nor any of those toys for when my grandnephews visit (who also love dinosaurs). I would occasionally also use those toys during tutoring sessions as reinforces.
I was just flabbergasted! I could easily store those toys on a top shelf and only get them out when we have visitors. They certainly aren't going to be taking up variable floor space.
So CD readers? What do you think? Do my adult children have the right to throw away toys from my house that they have not used for 20 years but I still use several times a year (and hope to use more now that I have grandchildren?
I don't think "ownership" is really the issue here.
Were you there when he dumped the stuff? You couldn't stop him or convince him to donate them (to YOU)??
What? Why would they throw away toys that aren't taking up space in their own house and you would like to keep? Do they think you have a problem with hoarding or something? I don't understand why they would come to your house and throw away their old toys. Honestly, I don't understand why they would throw away good, unbroken toys, period. Why not donate them or sell them if they thought they should be rid of them? How did they even get involved in this decision? Are they helping you move?
I would have said I'd like to keep some for the grandchildren and then donate the rest so other kids can enjoy them. There is no reason to be wasteful with toys when they could benefit other kids who might not have much.
I don't get it. If you were willing and able to keep them, and they didn't want them, why would they be thrown out? If you were not able to keep them, then give them to the kids to do with as they please.
I personally can't stand throwing something away that someone could use. I'd have fished them out of the trash and donated them.
My children, and others, are helping me move because my husband suffered a TBI and can not be left alone, nor can he participate in the move (as it upsets him very much).
Since someone has to watch him 24/7 and we already live in the two bedroom apartment I can not help very much.
Our son flew 2,000 miles to help for one week with the move and to prepare the condo for sale.
My daughter, who lives in town, convinced her brother to at least give the dinosaurs to Goodwill.
I am just beside myself. I don't know what to do. Our daughter said that her brother threw away many other toys and items such as that while I was supervising my husband (their father).
Last edited by germaine2626; 11-22-2015 at 08:31 PM..
The back story is that my husband and I are forced to move out of a 3 bedroom, two story condominium with a full basement and a 2 car garage into a 2 bedroom apartment with a small storage room. The new place is about 60% the size of our old place (but we can pay a small amount for an extra storage which would make it about 70%). We have gotten rid of hundreds of books, numerous book shelves and several large pieces of furniture.
Downsizing has been going fairly well with one snag. I saved many of our children's favorite toys. Not huge, huge boxes of them but perhaps three bankers boxes for each child of the nicest, favorite toys from baby toys to preteen toys. I only saved clean, unbroken toys. Sometimes I used these toys when I tutored children or when I babysat but my main goal was to have a bunch of nice toys for my grandchildren to use when the visited.
My son (age 32, father of two) and daughter (age 28, unmarried) said that they were their toys and that they had the right to throw them all away before we downsize into an apartment.
My son, just dumped almost a completely full box of Jurassic Park dinosaurs, jeeps and other accessories right into the garbage! They were clean & non-broken. My son has not even lived at our house in 14 years. Now, I do not even have one dinosaur or jeep to play with when my male grandson visits (who loves dinosaurs) nor any of those toys for when my grandnephews visit (who also love dinosaurs). I would occasionally also use those toys during tutoring sessions as reinforces.
I was just flabbergasted! I could easily store those toys on a top shelf and only get them out when we have visitors. They certainly aren't going to be taking up variable floor space.
My son and daughter are insistent that they are their toys and they have the right to throw them away.
So CD readers? What do you think? Do my adult children have the right to throw away toys from my house that they have not used for 20 years but I still use several times a year (and hope to use more now that I have grandchildren?
The toys were theirs until they moved out and left them behind in your home. They essentially abandoned the property.
I would get the toys he threw in the trash out of the trash if you want them because your son abandoned them a second time even though they are not his to abandon a second time.
This is so weird. If they want to "throw them out", then why can't they can just "throw" them to you? I don't get it. Why are they so insistent on throwing them out themselves?
Did your son know you wanted the toys. Perhaps he thought he was being helpful, not knowing you stuck used the toys.
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