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I think people clutching their pearls and talking about this in terms of being an moral or ethical person need to take a real look at what those things really mean.
So if your husband cheats on you just a little bit it's ok? Or your boss mucks around with your time sheet to avoid paying you 30 minutes of OT, that's ok? Your doctor asks if he can bill your insurance company for procedures not performed in return for waiving your copay? These are all things that have happened that obviously the people that did them thought that it was perfectly ok to do. Because they were just 'little' things that didn't really hurt anyone, at least in their own opinion of what's ethical. You do realize that all the 'little' instances of people not paying for mdse adds up to a pretty large problem for retailers, which affects consumers as a result?
You do know that some parents 'teach' their children to steal right? And most stores have cameras (both hidden and in plain sight) so your child 'taking' something might be caught on camera. Your toddler taking something may seem to be a bit of harmless fun but is it going to be funny when you are stopped by security
for shoplifting? Or if you frequent the same stores, that you come under closer security because your child has 'sticky' fingers?
Each parent has to decide how to teach their child lessons. I just want to know if you know that your child took something without paying for it and you ignore it, how do you teach them that stealing is wrong?
So if your husband cheats on you just a little bit it's ok? Or your boss mucks around with your time sheet to avoid paying you 30 minutes of OT, that's ok? Your doctor asks if he can bill your insurance company for procedures not performed in return for waiving your copay? These are all things that have happened that obviously the people that did them thought that it was perfectly ok to do. Because they were just 'little' things that didn't really hurt anyone, at least in their own opinion of what's ethical. You do realize that all the 'little' instances of people not paying for mdse adds up to a pretty large problem for retailers, which affects consumers as a result?
What if you get home from an overseas family trip and find that your child grabbed a penny-whistle when you weren't looking? Are you going to book another pair of transatlantic flights and search for the street vendor so you can return one cent worth of merchandise, or are you a horrible thieving crook?
So if your husband cheats on you just a little bit it's ok? Or your boss mucks around with your time sheet to avoid paying you 30 minutes of OT, that's ok? Your doctor asks if he can bill your insurance company for procedures not performed in return for waiving your copay? These are all things that have happened that obviously the people that did them thought that it was perfectly ok to do. Because they were just 'little' things that didn't really hurt anyone, at least in their own opinion of what's ethical. You do realize that all the 'little' instances of people not paying for mdse adds up to a pretty large problem for retailers, which affects consumers as a result?
While I agree with your examples, that those are obvious acts of dishonesty, I think it's a little more involved than that. Every business "writes off" certain expenses. We don't know what the article was that the child took home. MaryleeII had some good points. I think if this child did same again, I'd respond more seriously than the first.
I worry about toddlers who can't learn that things have to be paid for. I worry that they won't grow up well because there is something wrong with their ability to learn. Maybe they grow up to be parents who think it is adorable that their child is stealing?
Perhaps the concept of theft might be too much for a two year old, but by that age, my kid certainly understood that we had to pay for what we took. It is not a difficult concept for a two year old to learn, even of he learns it is a rule and not the moral reasoning behind it.
We had that lesson every time we went shopping: yes, you can have that banana but you can't eat now it because they have to weigh it before they know how much to charge us. You can eat it as soon a s we pay for it. Or, OK, you can eat this cookie now but it is your job to carry the wrapper and give it to the clerk so we can pay for it.
Or: what do you think? Should we buy this or not? If we aren't going to buy it, we put it back.
I also am a bit worried about a parent pushing a toddler around in the stroller, getting to the parking lot, removing the kid form the stroller and placing the child in a car seat, disassembling the stroller and placing it in the car and all the while not noticing that the child is carrying around a shop lifted necklace (not to mention, how many stores have necklaces down at toddler eye level). Either that is very extremely non-observant or else is it deliberately allowing the child to steal, thinking to get away with it.
My mom was telling me a story what my 2yr. old niece had done while out shopping with her mom and Grandparents. They thought it was funny. I didn't and told my mom if my sister-in-law don't send the money to cover the cost of the necklace, it's stealing and not setting a good example for the kid. My mom acted like it was no big deal. I was mad.
Quote:
Originally Posted by HighFlyingBird
If it was something of great value I would make sure to take it back. But its happened with small things and I think it comes out in the wash. They often forget to put something in my bags likely more often then I end up with something I didn't end up paying for. And a 2 year old doesn't know they are stealing. So its not like that is a life lesson against crime. You remind them that the proper way to buy things
Your posts contradict themselves. So, which one is it? Stealing has a "value"? A store forgetting to put something in a bag is a mistake by the cashier/bagger and shopper who doesn't check before leaving.
A 2 yr old doesn't know what "stealing" means. Take the child back and teach them about right and wrong.
This is such an easy one, I don't see how it's worth 10 pages of debate.
2 Y/O's don't really understand paying for stuff, and the kid likely wouldn't remember taking the necklace by the time you'd driven back to the store. I'd keep the necklace in the car, and the next time we went to the store, guide the 2 Y/O to return it to the customer service desk.
Or just drop it off myself. "Hey, my kid snatched this the last time we were here. Sorry."
As for inventory loss/non-bagged items, if I don't get a pack of tic-tacs when I'm unpacking, I stick the receipt in my wallet and tell them they forgot to bag it the last time. I either get my money back or a replacement item. NBD.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 10 days ago)
35,636 posts, read 17,982,736 times
Reputation: 50676
Quote:
Originally Posted by DubbleT
So if your husband cheats on you just a little bit it's ok? Or your boss mucks around with your time sheet to avoid paying you 30 minutes of OT, that's ok? Your doctor asks if he can bill your insurance company for procedures not performed in return for waiving your copay? These are all things that have happened that obviously the people that did them thought that it was perfectly ok to do. Because they were just 'little' things that didn't really hurt anyone, at least in their own opinion of what's ethical. You do realize that all the 'little' instances of people not paying for mdse adds up to a pretty large problem for retailers, which affects consumers as a result?
Hmmmm. A 2 year old picking up and keeping an item that has little value (don't know what this jewelry was worth) is not intentional. Unintentional actions aren't crimes - crimes involve intent. This would fall into "unintentional taking" on the part of the adult managing that child.
This is the same as if your husband is on an airplane in the middle seat and the woman in the aisle seat stands up to accommodate his getting out to use the bathroom, and they awkwardly rub fronts together for several moments before he is able to exit the aisle.
How often does a store forget to put something in a bag that you paid for and you end up without it? A lot. I used to work at a store. They make no effort to get it back to you. In fact, its returned to the store shelves and sold again.
OP I would have gone back to the store with child in tow and had them hand the necklace back and apologize.
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