what would you do if your toddler put something in the stroller while shopping and didn't realize it until getting home? (children, kids)

[Mattie]

Originally Posted by lkb0714

That's an excuse.

Call the store, pay with a credit card.

Those who choose not to pay for stolen items are making a choice. End of story.

Yes, the adults are. Nobody would blame the children who don't know any better. But they will grow up not knowing any better unless the adult addresses it, each and every time.

The excuses are pretty pathetic. I work for a non-profit, and we run a thrift store to support our community programs. Theft is rampant. People actually believe that because we sell donated items, they aren't hurting us if they steal. And maybe they aren't, but they are hurting those we help.

[JerseyGirl415]

I think people are really overreacting. OP seems to be asking about extremely young children (says toddlers) who don't even realize what they're doing when they pull something from a shelf, say as you're walking the cart by it, because kids get bored and curiously touch everything, and into the cart. That is not a child or adult who is intentionally stealing. Theft requires intent, and to be honest, a charge for not returning a pack of gum your tiny child put in the cart without you knowing wouldn't stick because prosecutors have actual crimes to worry about. I would know.

I agree with HighFlyingBird that something as cheap and trivial as a small pack of gum probably isn't worth returning. Would I return it? Maybe. Maybe I'd hang onto it until the next time I go to the store - I'm sure as hell not driving back for something so trivial and small and cheap (which are the types of things most likely to go unnoticed in a cart or bag). Or maybe I'd intend to do that, and then forget, because I have actual things to worry about and life goes on. Some items just aren't worth it. It sounds arbitrary because it is. But oh well. I think most truly moral and law abiding people can decide what is and isn't worth it to return at some point or that very day. I wouldn't lose sleep over it or accuse people of being amoral or criminals or blah blah.

If your child is old enough to understand the concept of stealing and did it on purpose, that's a completely different story. I would definitely bring something trivial as gum back in that case, because the child knowingly did it and needs to be taught that's wrong. But OP explicitly in the title says toddlers and it's not the same with a kid that young. And I think parents can also judge at whatever age whether their kid knew what they were doing, so there's not even a bright line rule for age either.
But as adults, most honestly wouldn't care about the pack of gum a baby put into a cart that mom didn't see. They really just won't. It was an innocent mistake and it's something so minor. One who thinks like this can still be a law-abiding person with morals. Technically, you also break the law when you speed, even 1 mph above the posted limit. Roll through a stop sign. Cross double yellow lines even a little bit when passing a car pulled over onto a narrow shoulder and there's oncoming traffic. Stay in the left lane for too long in many states. There ARE degrees of severity in breaking the law. If one wants to bring the gum back, great. Good for you. But if someone wouldn't... oh well. No need to start thinly attacking people who admit they don't particularly care about something so trivial and unintentional.

[CarolinaMoon1]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

So, OP, can you please be clearer? Was this a junky little necklace, value $5 or less? If the item is more than $20, they need to take it back as soon as it's convenient.

Seriously, if an item you didn't pay for was less than $20, then you would not return it? How did you determine this amount as your criterion?

I would return anything of any value the next time I went to that store, and maybe right away depending on the price. Yeah, a pack of gum, I might accidentally forget about it ... but probably not.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by CarolinaMoon1

Seriously, if an item you didn't pay for was less than $20, then you would not return it? How did you determine this amount as your criterion?

I would return anything of any value the next time I went to that store, and maybe right away depending on the price. Yeah, a pack of gum, I might accidentally forget about it ... but probably not.

I would return it even if it were $1, the next time I was there, because I'm a bit obsessive about that kind of thing, and shout after people who have left change at the register I am about to use self-serve, hey you forgot to take your money.

I've told clerks, "there's no way the total is this low - I think you've missed something".

But I don't hold everyone to that standard, because the store might be a distance away, and their time may be much tighter than mine.

So yes. If the item is $5, then I'm willing to say accidents happen. If it's more than 20, yes, you need to find a way to pay that back even if it means figuring tax and sending a check in the mail with no explanation at all.

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by lkb0714

That's an excuse.

Call the store, pay with a credit card.

Those who choose not to pay for stolen items are making a choice. End of story.

I'm curious how that would go. You call the store, and describe the item, and say I'd like to pay for the $3 item with my credit card over the phone, please.

Employee time is worth something. It's hard to believe it would be worth an employees time and effort to take that payment.

But it would be interesting to try it (not stealing an item, just calling and trying to set that up and see what happens).

[emm74]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

I'm curious how that would go. You call the store, and describe the item, and say I'd like to pay for the $3 item with my credit card over the phone, please.

Employee time is worth something. It's hard to believe it would be worth an employees time and effort to take that payment.

But it would be interesting to try it (not stealing an item, just calling and trying to set that up and see what happens).

I think that at least some of the time, the store would say thanks for calling but it's ok, or they'd say oh, just bring it back the next time you are in.

But the reality is that I'm not doing it for the store's sake, I'm doing it for my peace of mind.

I also wonder if the people who think an item under $20 (or whatever number they consider the dividing line) isn't worth going back for feel the same way when it's the opposite direction and they end up at home without their item for some reason. Are they equally blase and just shrug it off and say "eh, stuff happens..."

[CarolinaMoon1]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

I would return it even if it were $1, the next time I was there, because I'm a bit obsessive about that kind of thing, and shout after people who have left change at the register I am about to use self-serve, hey you forgot to take your money.

I've told clerks, "there's no way the total is this low - I think you've missed something".

But I don't hold everyone to that standard, because the store might be a distance away, and their time may be much tighter than mine.

So yes. If the item is $5, then I'm willing to say accidents happen. If it's more than 20, yes, you need to find a way to pay that back even if it means figuring tax and sending a check in the mail with no explanation at all.

So a $19.00 item you didn't pay for is okay to keep?

[ClaraC]

Originally Posted by CarolinaMoon1

So a $19.00 item you didn't pay for is okay to keep?

You keep saying "you".

I already answered what I personally would do. When I give advice, I'm a little less harsh on others than I am on myself. And I'm done conversing about this with you, because I believe I don't have to attend every fight I'm invited to.

[CarolinaMoon1]

Originally Posted by ClaraC

You keep saying "you".

I already answered what I personally would do. When I give advice, I'm a little less harsh on others than I am on myself. And I'm done conversing about this with you, because I believe I don't have to attend every fight I'm invited to.

[HighFlyingBird]

I am shining off crowns of perfect moral leadership. Line up. But bring the gum your kid tossed into the bag without paying.