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I know somebody in his 40s who moved in with the parents after his divorce, to reduce expenses and pay off some debts.
Everybody has different struggles.
This said, I dated somebody who lived with his parents and this is really tough. Basically, we have had zero privacy. When I was there, his parents were there too. His parents were really nice to me, but it is really a difficult situation for all of us.
My brothers moved out of our house at age of 18. Even though I won't judge, I am not used to men who live with their parents.
Lack of decent paying jobs and expensive rents which skyrockets every year.
Quote:
Originally Posted by floridanative10
My dad made me pay rent to live in our house when I came back from college and had tons of chores and stuff to pay growing up. I lived in a large brady bunch style family and was young and low on the totem pole when it came to my own room, I lived in an attic room, a glorified laundry room in the basement , and above a horse barn during my youth! lol Of course, my dad was cheap but what kind of dad wants his 18-34 year old son living at home?
I have a feeling this is alot of single moms and mothers allowing this, I just dont see too many fathers accepting this unless you are working and have a plan to get out
Most parents don't mind their adult children as long as they are working or pursuing higher education.
Untrue. There are usually some entry level positions in most companies, that require only GED or high school. Prove you are a good employee and you move up. Still.
Running away to a foreign country because you cannot cut it here or don't want to take the effort, is un-American.
Sure that is true some people can move up but there are not enough higher positions for everyone. If these companies have everyone move up they will go out of business because no one will be working the entry level jobs.
Sure that is true some people can move up but there are not enough higher positions for everyone. If these companies have everyone move up they will go out of business because no one will be working the entry level jobs.
Positions become available through growth, expansion, retirement and people leaving for other jobs. People get promoted then new ones fill the entry level positions again, just like always. In a manufacturing/trade environment the skilled jobs are more plentiful and harder to fill than entry level jobs, so there is room to move up. People get fired all the time for doing stupid things, so a good dependable worker is gold.
Yes , but it can be a crapshoot. A college classmate of mine lived with two roommates while starting out as an engineer, and one of them wound up being near crazy and pulled a gun on the two of them. It's something you often just have to do and put up with, but it can be risky, and it's very hard to "evaluate character" so well that you know what you're getting.
WTF? How hard is it to evaluate someone you know? Only someone desperate or foolish moves in with someone they don't know.
WTF? How hard is it to evaluate someone you know? Only someone desperate or foolish moves in with someone they don't know.
That's just not realistic in many urban areas where people have to live with roommates for years. I had two roommates give me a month's notice that they weren't renewing the lease - one to move back home with his parents, one to move in with her fiance. I wanted to keep the place so I had to find two people and none of my friends were looking. Either I then had to find a new situation with new roommates or find two new people to fill the rooms. It is what it is.
That's just not realistic in many urban areas where people have to live with roommates for years. I had two roommates give me a month's notice that they weren't renewing the lease - one to move back home with his parents, one to move in with her fiance. I wanted to keep the place so I had to find two people and none of my friends were looking. Either I then had to find a new situation with new roommates or find two new people to fill the rooms. It is what it is.
Not realistic because lots of people are moving out with little notice? Really? That's your example to refute what I said? On top of that, I said 2 things, foolish or desperate. You admitted you fell into the 2nd category.
.....sigh
It was more important for you to stay put and the only way to do that was to get roommates. You didn't live within your means so you needed roommates, plural, in order to do so. That's your choice. It's more expensive to live alone but doable.
I get it. It's a pain to move but in the long run it's the smart move. I've had roommates before even though I could afford to live alone. I knew them.
What you said and I said about our personal experiences doesn't really matter. It's not about us.
The most important question is this. Do you think your situation represents why more 18-34 year olds are living at home with their parents? Because roommates moved out at the last second and they couldn't find anyone they knew who needed a place to live?
I cannot afford to live alone so I need multiple roommates. I cannot afford to live alone so I have to move in with my parents. You do see the theme here don't you?
Last edited by Loveshiscountry; 01-20-2017 at 07:01 PM..
Not realistic because lots of people are moving out with little notice? Really?
It was more important for you to stay put and the only way to do that was to get roommates. You didn't live within your means so you needed roommates, plural, in order to do so. That's your choice. It's more expensive to live alone but doable.
I get it. It's a pain to move but in the long run it's the smart move. I've had roommates before even though I could afford to live alone. I knew them.
What you said and I said doesn't matter. It's not about us.
The most important question is this. Do you think your situation represents why more 18-34 year olds are living at home with their parents? Because roommates moved out at the last second and they couldn't find anyone they knew who needed a place to live?
I didn't live within my means? I don't think you know what that means. For many of us, living within our means requires living with roommates. In my case, I could technically afford to live on my own (though even the cheapest studio apartments way out in the suburbs within an hour from my suburban office are upwards of $1300 a month plus utilities - not at all "doable" for many people!), but I wouldn't have much left over to save. Staying put means I keep advantage of lower rent since comparable rooms cost at least $200 a month more than what I'm paying now due to the dramatic increase in cost of living since I moved in 5 years ago. Right now, I put the entire difference between what I would pay to live on my own and what I pay now into savings, and then some, which is why many people live at home or with multiple roommates even when they can afford not to. Living beyond my means? Hardly! I'm just preparing for my future, including if my cancer were to return, and will be in good shape to try to locate somewhere cheaper (though with a weaker job market) when I finish my employer-paid-for master's degree.
If my parents lived locally, I had a good relationship with them, and they found it mutually beneficial, would I live at home? Absolutely! I could pay them rent instead of a landlord, helping keep wealth in the family rather than outside, or, if they didn't demand rent, I could save upwards of 50% of my income toward that $70,000 downpayment for a starter home that I'll need if I want to put down 20%.
In my social circle (well educated, middle class workers at early stages of our careers), the high cost of living means that many families find it advantageous to build family wealth by allowing their adult children to live at home so long as they are in school or working. That's a big reason why my former roommate moved out - he realized he was working 2 jobs and eating ramen for independence and had nothing at the end of the day to show for it. His mom asked for half the rent he was paying here which was a huge help to her household, and he was able to save the rest. Win-win.
Granted, in lower cost of living areas, this may not be such a big deal. But then again, I grew up in a very cheap area and many of my friends from high school lived at home until they could buy a house. None were slackers and their families all ended up better positioned at the end.
My own parents both lived with my grandmother for several years until they could put a downpayment down on a condo, helping her update the house and lightening her financial load. This is nothing new.
My comment was simply pointing out that living with people you don't know isn't that uncommon in high cost of living areas. Everyone I know who has roommates lived with people who were originally strangers since our lease cycles never line up. Occasionally it might work out, but generally you're finding people who you get a good feeling from and they check out online and through roommate references, and hope for the best.
Positions become available through growth, expansion, retirement and people leaving for other jobs. People get promoted then new ones fill the entry level positions again, just like always. In a manufacturing/trade environment the skilled jobs are more plentiful and harder to fill than entry level jobs, so there is room to move up. People get fired all the time for doing stupid things, so a good dependable worker is gold.
That does not happen in real life we have more people then jobs available and not enough people are retiring. Some people are just not smart enough to do more then entry level jobs.
That does not happen in real life we have more people then jobs available and not enough people are retiring. Some people are just not smart enough to do more thenentry leveljobs.
A lot of jobs are requiring college debt to get a job. A lot of jobs are requiring software experience, 2-5 yrs experience at the job applying for, typing skills, then we have the low wage thing going on. I think it's much more than someone not being smart enough.
Plus, not to long ago, many men got married, had children and both parents raised those children to be productive children. Men are now facing the huge home, fancy car, many children, credit card spending, which, equals huge debt at a young age. Life seems to be getting more complicated than simple for the young.
By the way I know people in their 50's who have gone through divorce and are needing roommates to hold onto the house they have been paying on for awhile. It's certainly not just the youth suffering, divorce is destroying adult wealth.
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