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Quizillla, I empathize with you I'm also a Californian used to a short drive to the ocean (Would weekend-trip it to San Francisco very frequently, and go camping at Dillon's Beach, hit up bodega bay, redwoods, etc.), and all of my family and friends being back in CA while I'm in Phoenix. Been here 12 years now (Moved for a job offer that went nowhere) and still don't like it. It's already too warm for me in February haha! I stay, however, because it's pretty darn cheap and the husband and I both have good jobs. *shrug* Sort of resigned to being here due to the cost of living, for now.
I console myself with California house shopping and looking at pictures online LOL
Edit: I do try to get up to northern AZ though, it's very pretty up in that part of the state
I'm so glad I'm not alone! Do you think you'll try and get a job in CA and move away from AZ? I so feel you... it's going to hit 90 this week... in FEBRUARY!
The COL of California does overwhelm me... but people manage to "make it work" I just want to live somewhere I like...PHX is not that place...
Its sometimes hard to find a graduate degree program that you love. I do not recommend changing schools - trust me! As a person who tried the graduate school route years ago, and was in one of the best MBA programs in the east coast, I can say grad schools are not all equal. I HATED it! I realize I went for the name, and networking ability, and actually did "enjoy" anything about it. Fast forward years later I am a specialist in my field, so it wasn't the worst move to drop out. Had I actually attended a school and program I liked though, my life would be so much different. So be careful with the idea of transferring schools.
I SO agree and great advice... I've been in my grad. program almost 1 year, I don't know if ANY of my credits would transfer if I went back to California and the deadlines also JUST passed for next year's app. cycle, so I would have to wait a year and a half anyway before I got accepted to another program. The school I'm going to is very well respected... its a big public research university.
This is how I felt living in Texas. I was committed for a two year contract and it would have been career suicide to break it. I stuck it out and in retrospect I'm glad I did, but it sure sucked at the time.
My advice, based on my experience:
1. Travel. Even a brief reprieve can provide mental refreshment. But it might be better to go somewhere new and fresh, rather than going back to what you're homesick for.
2. Escapism. Is there something you really enjoy, that transports you to a different mental space? I played a ton of RPG video games while in Texas.
3. Find local adventures. Yes, it's gross and hot and ugly and you hate it. But you'll feel less hostile toward it if you're doing things that are at least INTERESTING, even if fun is pushing it. Go to museums, whatever events the community is having, explore odd nooks and crannies, do day trips, etc.
4. If you have even a slight artistic bent, take up something like painting or photography. This can force you to find the beauty even in place that overall does not aesthetically please you. Photography has really changed how I look at things...drawn my attention more to interesting details, color combinations, etc. that I might not otherwise have noticed.
I love all these ideas! I SO agree with not going back home as often... everytime I come back to AZ after being in CA it takes me like 2 weeks to recover and it's a mini tragedy... :P ha! It's just a LOT tougher to come back to a place I dislike after going back home and realizing what I'm missing. I'm planning trips to Oregon, Colorado, and Washington in the upcoming year... these are all places I'm also considering moving if CA doesn't work out, as they are all green and a lot cooler and NOT desert.
Local adventure wise... i've been taking trips to Sedona and Flagstaff and that really is something great for me to look forward to on the weekends. It takes about 1.5-2 hours to get to these places. I also really enjoy Old-Town Scottsdale (when it's not a bajillion degrees outside).
Another few ideas that might help me is forcing myself to go to ONE "meet-up" a week... :P doing a yoga-class (I have a lot of hip-studios near me), and maybe joining some art/ book groups.
At your age it's easy to have the grass is greener perspective. If you lived at home, you would be bemoaning how many years it would take you to be independent. Being an adult involves a LOT of compromises and two years is an extremely short period of time in the grand scheme of things. Others have posted a lot great suggestions. Keep looking to see what does float your boat about AZ and stop making it about all the ways it isn't. Perspective is great thing to have as you grow.
this is so very true... and it's a big reason why I haven't hopped in my car and driven home yet. I would be 22 with a college degree and living at home when i HAVE the opportunity not to. I know finding jobs in the Bay Area is a lot more competitive than finding them in Phoenix-Metro. I also know I'm able to afford working only 30 hours a week (and interning 16 hours a week) because cost of living where I am (Gilbert) is so low... I would NOT be able to work only part-time and live in San Francisco or Sonoma.
I definitely think these ideas will help me SO much.... I'm definitely going to look into traveling some in the next few years. Who knows? maybe I'll end up loving some place I visit MORE than California
You ARE lucky you did this move, because now you will appreciate California 100 times more when you move back! I've lived my whole life in Seattle and for the last 5 years I've wanted to move away SO badly (but have a husband and kids that don't want to). I feel stuck and grumpy.
So many people around me are so happy or contented here and I'm so jealous. I will say, however, that most of them aren't from here, so they have a perspective and experiences that I've never had.
Sometimes I wonder if I'd moved away at some point I could have come back and really appreciated it here, except that I now think I'm not as cut out for a large crowded city as I used to be. Personally I would be grateful for a 2 year plan. Instead I'm looking at 9 years before the kids are off to college. Then I'm OUT of here!
I truly wish I was content here, but instead I feel trapped and unhappy. I really need a new adventure. You've had one and when you go home, Dorothy, you will feel like there's no place like home. :-)
I love that perspective! If I ever make it to CA, I won't EVER leave again. This is very, very, very wise and so true! Can I ask what you dislike about Seattle? That's one of the "top" places I'd like to move after my masters if California doesn't work out. I've heard GREAT things about the city and that there's a lot to do there... it's also very close to water and it's a very "green city" or so I've heard. I also hear it does RAIN and drizzle a LOT though, which can be unfortunate.
How is cost of living/ job opportunities in Seattle?
You like what you like and you shouldn't have to apologize for it. I like greenery and water too.
I can survive in the desert but I don't thrive there. We brought in green plants, art and photo landscapes we prefer, and added a large saltwater aquarium, stocked it with live rock and tropical fish. Try something like this. Bring a little, or a lot, of back home into your current home.
I hope you stick with it in AZ. It's only 2 years. Don't make another irrational decision you will regret.
that's a great idea! I definitely think these two years can be manageable... I just have to find a way to put things in my schedule that I look FORWARD to... now it's just class, work, internship, homework... yuck! I want to make sure I have at least 1 fun thing to look forward to each month.
OP - I'm from San Francisco and I feel your pain. I dream about SF all the time.
I'm in a town I hate now (had to move here for work reasons) but I have plans to move to Europe.
To get me through, I've spent almost every day this past year working on the move. Learning my new career, learning the new language, looking at websites in my new town, etc.
In other words: dangling the carrot in front of my nose every day until all is ready for me to blast off.
I'll take a holiday in SF before I move to Europe. It's hard leaving SF - such a great city!
OP - I'm from San Francisco and I feel your pain. I dream about SF all the time.
I'm in a town I hate now (had to move here for work reasons) but I have plans to move to Europe.
To get me through, I've spent almost every day this past year working on the move. Learning my new career, learning the new language, looking at websites in my new town, etc.
In other words: dangling the carrot in front of my nose every day until all is ready for me to blast off.
I'll take a holiday in SF before I move to Europe. It's hard leaving SF - such a great city!
Good luck!
I completely agree! It's beautiful there... : ( I miss it so much!
GO BACK TO CA! Life's too short. If it were me, I'd probably tough it out. But you miss CA so much, and your parents are old, you said. You should spend your time with the people you love. There's nothing more important than that. They will be gone one day, and you will have this time in your memories.
Here's what just happened to me: One of my sisters was not well and institutionalized for years. Getting worse and worse. I lived in another state, but after retiring early, planned on moving closer so I could go visit her regularly. (I talked to her on the phone often and sent her packages.) I got bogged down with where to move, fixing up my house, got overwhelmed, and before you know it....she passed away earlier than we all expected her to. SO I NEVER GOT TO SEE HER AGAIN. I am kicking myself for not just moving earlier.
If you are torn between the bf and your parents, I can't help you there. It's likely the bf will not be permanent (most aren't....statistics), so I wouldn't diss my family for a bf. No way. But if you are truly torn, that's your decision.
Don't expect the bf to move back with you. He might, but it's unfair to expect him to do that.
You didn't say how old you are. Hopefully there's enough time for you to complete your education back in CA.
Lots of good advice....I would also suggest asking your parents to visit a few times over the next couple years. That will give you incentive to explore places to take them.
You could also go home for visits. All of this will help...and like others have said, you'll have a couple of years job experience and a masters at the end of this. I assure you that will make your parents very happy...and will ease their concerns for your future.
You are a caring person. Have a wonderful life. Now call your parents and tell them how much you love and miss them.
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I'm also a Californian used to a short drive to the ocean (Would weekend-trip it to San Francisco very frequently, and go camping at Dillon's Beach, hit up bodega bay, redwoods, etc.), and all of my family and friends being back in CA while I'm in Phoenix. Been here 12 years now (Moved for a job offer that went nowhere) and still don't like it. It's already too warm for me in February haha! I stay, however, because it's pretty darn cheap and the husband and I both have good jobs. *shrug* Sort of resigned to being here due to the cost of living, for now. 
