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Seeking a mate just to not be alone is definitely not the best way to go. If the desperation does not turn others off, you are likely to find yourself in a very toxic/abusive relationship. I mean if that is what you want, then by all means go for it. I think pets are definitely okay to have.
Not all single people are obsessing over finding someone to the point that they make it a "structural problem". What makes up a romantic relationship are two human beings. Neither of them can be "tools" or some "object" or "accessory" to someone else's life.
Work on appreciating your own company. If you can't stand yourself, how can you expect someone else to be able to stand you?
Seeking a mate just to not be alone is definitely not the best way to go. If the desperation does not turn others off, you are likely to find yourself in a very toxic/abusive relationship. I mean if that is what you want, then by all means go for it. I think pets are definitely okay to have.
Not all single people are obsessing over finding someone to the point that they make it a "structural problem". What makes up a romantic relationship are two human beings. Neither of them can be "tools" or some "object" or "accessory" to someone else's life.
Work on appreciating your own company. If you can't stand yourself, how can you expect someone else to be able to stand you?
People seek mating relationships for sex and companionship. According to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, sex is a more essential need than companionship, so people are electing to form these relationships more for the sex than to fulfill a loneliness issue.
Some people are passionate about pets. Some people get pets from the wrong mindset, and that's not good for the person or the pet. A pet does not solve a problem in most cases. Pets create new problems for the single and unattached looking to date.
A lot of people won't notice loneliness if they are having sex.
They lack access to sex, which distorts their minds. Reduces judgment and enhances addictions and suicide. Lacking access to sex is a crisis on par with lacking access to food and clean water.
People seek mating relationships for sex and companionship. According to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, sex is a more essential need than companionship, so people are electing to form these relationships more for the sex than to fulfill a loneliness issue.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RJ312
A lot of people won't notice loneliness if they are having sex.
"The women I interviewed were eager to build connections, intimacy and trust with their sexual partners. Instead, almost all of them found themselves going along with hookups that induced overwhelming self-doubt, emotional instability and loneliness."
Also, I am reading a biography about Elvis right now and he was plagued by a feeling of deep loneliness and emptiness most of his adult life even though he had a constant and steady stream of casual and/or monogamous sexual partners. He also was constantly surrounded by his inner circle of fawning sycophants.
Last edited by LadyBlue111; 02-23-2020 at 09:21 AM..
People seek mating relationships for sex and companionship. According to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, sex is a more essential need than companionship, so people are electing to form these relationships more for the sex than to fulfill a loneliness issue.
Some people are passionate about pets. Some people get pets from the wrong mindset, and that's not good for the person or the pet. A pet does not solve a problem in most cases. Pets create new problems for the single and unattached looking to date.
A lot of people won't notice loneliness if they are having sex.
Well guess what.
When the sex is over, this "loneliness" is gonna come back.
Yes, people get pets for the wrong reasons as well.
Really, I see a lot of people (especially men) doing everything they can to escape loneliness which includes relationships, sex, and getting a pet. The actual problem with that is they are using someone else (human, other animal) to fulfill their own desires.
Kinda strange for sex to be considered a more essential need than companionship seeing that a lot of people go without sex more so than they go without friends.
But if it is that essential to you... But I guarantee you that you are not going to die from lack of sex if you have friends or a very active social life...unless you take your own life.
Well guess what. When the sex is over, this "loneliness" is gonna come back.
Constant pursuit of new, novel sexual partners could also be more of an addiction with the planning, build-up, excitement, victory of conquest after conquest. It could be more that the need to feed the addiction comes back versus any actual loneliness coming back. It's all more a diversion or game to be played with others serving pursuit of/need for winning, dominance, ego, distraction, fun while also getting sexual needs met. The person may not be doing it to seek companionship or connection but to satisfy those other wants and needs. If both participants are on board with and privy to this dynamic then probably no harm done.
Last edited by LadyBlue111; 02-23-2020 at 01:57 PM..
This is incorrect. These men hurt immensely. They lack access to sex, which distorts their minds. Reduces judgment and enhances addictions and suicide. Lacking access to sex is a crisis on par with lacking access to food and clean water.
About 'enhancing addictions' and reducing judgment too - had a relationship for eight years which included lots of sex - when the relationship was over, the man took up cigar smoking out of the blue and he had never smoked at all before. He said the cigar smoking was a replacement for sex. (he did not acquire another girlfriend for whatever reasons)
Unfortunately the cigar smoking has stayed with him for decades. And at times has definitely been an addiction. And the cigar smoking turned into a chewing tobacco habit too. (both cigars and chewing tobacco - very unappealing to others but also not good for health)
I was shocked that he took up cigar smoking and then chewing tobacco too when we were no longer in a relationship. He never seemed like a person who would do so. (I consider both repellent)
It seems obvious that Maslow was male. They're the only ones I've ever heard say if they don't have a partner they're robbed of sex. LOL
Plenty of women suffer from lack of touch, lack of sensory affects of skin to skin, lack of physical affection, lack of caressing, lack of intimacy, lack of giving and receiving sexual and sensory pleasure, lack of kissing, lack of the physical sensations of sexual intercourse, lack of the psychological benefits of all of the above.
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