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I think what it boils down to, and what made me personally realize that I was doomed in the romance arena, is the answer to the question, did you have men interested in you when you were younger? If so, then you might have a good chance of meeting someone in the future.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801
Exactly. Some of these posts are similar to the ones to well-educated unemployed people who tell them to shine their shoes, send resumes out every day, network, etc., and they ARE doing all those things and still can't get a job and don't know why.
Ouch.
I'm not trying to be cavalier to the OP or to what you've said in this thread so far. And I do realize that not everyone finds someone compatible.
But not finding someone and someone not existing who is right for you are two different things. I think that's where location plays a big part of dating success. I'm on Long Island. I've never dated here in my adult life, other than my SO. And honestly? I think I would have a difficult time finding another partner here. Long Island is stuck in the 70s, and I find a lot of the men here to be sexist and backwards. They wouldn't like me, either. I'm too independent, too strong in my opinions, and too socially progressive for many of them.
So if I were single again and wanted to date, I would not stay here. I would go where I know I'd meet people with whom I had things in common (male and female, just in general), whose lifestyles matched, and who are less likely to be sexist: a more urban environment, most likely back to the D.C. area, which is pretty socially progressive and where I had to beat them off with a stick.
Believe me, I'm no beauty queen. I'm pretty average but I clean up well and have a brain--and men from D.C. want readers.
u r so right. u wouldnt run into them. they never type on CDF on friday and saturday night. they gota feed the chickens and milk the cows, and dont forget, the wonderful saturday night bath. of course that is part of the good treatment farmers give women, they let them boil the washtub and fix them dinner.
Life kept me really busy since my divorce. That's another story, and not the focus of my post here.
I was busy going to school, earning a living, supporting my kids. I didn't have much time for any social life, especially when I worked nights and weekends. Or when I had to move 3 times in 10 years to stay employed.
In the decade I have been divorced, I have had very few dates. I find it very hard to meet men, so, online dating seemed like a good idea. Bad idea. Lots of gameplayers and marrieds on them. I found that now that I am over 50, no one contacts me. I get told I look young for my age. I don't have man hair. I haven't lost my, ahem, drive.
But no one contacts me because they can't get past the age. I looked at a lot of the profiles of men +/- 10 years of my age. Okay, not to be critical, but I will be critical, because this is the same criteria they use...they look old. And they are rejecting me. Do they really think they are going to get someone who would be their daughter's age to date them? Maybe if they have tons of money, but that is a whole other game, the golddigger.
When I try to contact someone, I get rejected, bounced, because I am not the right age for their parameters.
It pains me to think I might go to my grave not ever really knowing and loving a man, or being loved back. I always thought it was something that would happen in life. I wonder if anyone falls in love anymore, or is it simply lust.
All of this screening, long, scripted profiles...seems to somehow take away from the sheer enjoyment of trying to meet someone.
Someone sees one little thing, and bingo, they move on. Like a kid in a candy store, the ribbon candy comes in about 50 flavors and colors. He just can't make up his mind. And he just can't chose one, because something better just might come along.
I wonder if others feel like I do. I hear that the divorce rate is 50%, but I don't see 50% of the adults from 21 to 99 as singles. Everyone seems to be married. Men say they don't want to be "tied down", "lose their freedom", etc., but how come so many are married? Just to have kids?
There is nothing wrong with me. I don't have a third eye. I am intelligent and a decent person. I am traditional, but I get the feeling that gets interpreted to mean dull or boring, and I don't think I am. I am not trying to brag, this is just my own assessment of me.
Where are the decent people? Please don't say "church" because churches are families, and nothing is colder than being around a lot families when you are single.
Is it a lost cause for anyone over 50?
I am 52 and have several friends who are single and dating.
Now this is not you.
But I ask them why they date younger women and they say. It's because women their age assume that they are damaged goods. They also say that women who have been married several times think that all men are dogs because of the way they were treated by past men.
They tell me that they are tired of having to prove to women that they are good guys and the younger women never treat them this way.
I am a 64 yo woman, been married 3 times, 2 deceased (both to cancer, long term), 1 divorced. At my age, I need a man like I need another hole drilled in my head. I live in Florida, all I see are old ladies taking care of old men, men who cannot hear, can't walk and can no longer drive, let alone remember their names. As for sex, neither can remember the last time they engaged in it, nor do either care.
Thanks, I'll pass.
Someone once said to me, if you need a man to complete you, you will never find true happiness, wish I would have listened to that person when I was younger.
To each their own, I am for whatever floats your boat!
Can you please stop trying giving me rep points so you can criticise me, if you have something to say to me, don't be a coward. Say it here so I can respond.
I have sent you ONE rep point and it was to assure you I don't think you are stupid. I was TRYING to be nice.
Since I did sign my name there is no way my comment could be taken as "cowardly"
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