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In SoCal, they used to call it "palimony". There was an unusual court case where some famous person's live-in gf got awarded alimony. Kind of started a trend for awhile. Fortunately, it blew over, and is long-forgotten, now.
Hah. My boyfriend - now husband - started "giving" me money when we got engaged, and he asked if I would quit my job to become a Navy wife and move with him to live on base at his new duty station, and I said yes, that sounded like something I'd like to do. So, yeah.
Except since we're mature adults in a committed relationship who are sharing a home and a life together, we just call it, you know, "our money."
If a guy makes 500k a year, and far more than he needs, and his gf makes 40k a year, and just makes ends meet, is it really that bad?
If he wants go to Asia for two weeks, but it's $3000/person, and he can afford it, and she can't, should he say "sorry, you can't come with, you can't afford it" or should he say, "I understand you can't afford it, but I have plenty of extra money, I have no problem paying for you to come with because I love and appreciate you and enjoy your company?"
I wonder what the financial situations are of the people giving some of these responses in this thread, and also some of the women/men they are dating...
My girlfriend spoils me rotten for the things she does for me. Any one of our family members or friends would tell me that. I also aim to spoil her as well. We don't keep "tabs" of who does what. She does stuff for me because she loves me, and vice versa. She has a lot more free time than me, so her things are in that aspect for helping, and I have a good amount of money, so I pay for us to go on trips, buy things, etc.
We could break up tomorrow and I would never regret a single dollar I spent on her.. She is the first girl I've ever dated that we've been like this (been together two years) and I made about 90k less when we met so it wasn't always like this.
Saying I won't pay for a girls dinner is like saying a girl shouldn't cook a guy dinner.. They are both silly, but they both go hand in hand.. You do stuff for people you love, whether it's actions or monetary things..
Time is money. If my girlfriend spends 6 hours knitting me a scarf (which she did recently) then how is that any different than me spending a couple hours of pay to take her out to dinner, to get her some boots, jeans, etc?
^Certainly there are guys that are stingy, and guys who are generous. Certainly paying for dinner shouldn't be in the same category of paying her debt. In theory, it may not seem like much to give a girlfriend money, and while your girlfriend seems really sweet, this is not the case the majority of time. It becomes a regular thing, then more money, more stuff that she feels entitled to and takes for granted. A girlfriend is not obligated to the same things as a wife. That is the point most posters are making.
Certainly paying for dinner shouldn't be in the same category of paying her debt.
100%.
Doing the culturally-expected offer-to-cover-the-check thing as a guy, and (either person) covering the cost of the other for a trip or event if one can't afford it and the other is loaded and is the one suggesting the idea is fine. Flat out giving the other person money, paying their debts, or anything else like that outside marriage is Kanye West lyrics territory.
Location: I don't know..If you find me, let me know.
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If you wanna dating with girls and if you think about the money this is not fair. Or Dating with that girls who has a job and she will affords the bills and etc.
OK, I agree with all the this, however how about if he's sleeping at your place every night, eating your food, etc...should he pitch in at all?
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