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I met my bf at an event 6 years ago; age: late 20's. Both of us had no kids and still have not kids. Majority of his friends have no kids. Most of my friends do have kids except 2. I work in an office of 12 people, ages 35+ (I'm the baby of the office) most of the office are DINKs (Dual Income, No Kids) or single with no kids. This also applied to past employees. I live in the Midwest.
I have always been CF and got a tubal ligation at age 30. I wonder why someone who claims to be firmly CF would not have a tubal or vasectomy. People wailed, "But it's so final," exactly. If you're going to marry with the understanding that you're both CF, why wouldn't you do everything possible to avoid a 'whoops?'
I probably lost one great guy over the issue but he was adamant about wanting children and I was very clear about not. If someone hasn't had surgery to prevent pregnancy, it's worth it to wonder why not, or how committed that person really is to being CF.
I also fondly remember the Usenet news group alt.support.childfree. What a rollicking corner of the Internet universe it was!
I have always been CF and got a tubal ligation at age 30. I wonder why someone who claims to be firmly CF would not have a tubal or vasectomy. People wailed, "But it's so final," exactly. If you're going to marry with the understanding that you're both CF, why wouldn't you do everything possible to avoid a 'whoops?'
I probably lost one great guy over the issue but he was adamant about wanting children and I was very clear about not. If someone hasn't had surgery to prevent pregnancy, it's worth it to wonder why not, or how committed that person really is to being CF.
I also fondly remember the Usenet news group alt.support.childfree. What a rollicking corner of the Internet universe it was!
I believe insurances consider it to be an elective procedure though, unless it is medically necessary. It's not a cheap procedure, and yes, you could make the argument that it's cheaper than a child one doesn't want, but it's not cheaper than birth control.
I believe insurances consider it to be an elective procedure though, unless it is medically necessary. It's not a cheap procedure, and yes, you could make the argument that it's cheaper than a child one doesn't want, but it's not cheaper than birth control.
Might depend on your insurance company but it fell under family planning for us and it was a $50 copay for a vasectomy or $100 for a tubal ligation for ( $50 for the surgeon plus $50 for the anesthesiologist).
I have always been CF and got a tubal ligation at age 30. I wonder why someone who claims to be firmly CF would not have a tubal or vasectomy. People wailed, "But it's so final," exactly. If you're going to marry with the understanding that you're both CF, why wouldn't you do everything possible to avoid a 'whoops?'
I probably lost one great guy over the issue but he was adamant about wanting children and I was very clear about not. If someone hasn't had surgery to prevent pregnancy, it's worth it to wonder why not, or how committed that person really is to being CF.
I also fondly remember the Usenet news group alt.support.childfree. What a rollicking corner of the Internet universe it was!
I've had a hell of a time trying to get an OBGYN to do a tubal ligation. I've been trying since I was 21 and am now 27.
Maybe they will become more receptive once I turn 30?
Might depend on your insurance company but it fell under family planning for us and it was a $50 copay for a vasectomy or $100 for a tubal ligation for ( $50 for the surgeon plus $50 for the anesthesiologist).
Huh. I'll have to check my plan. That's not bad at all.
At the risk of entering into a political discussion, I really think there should be some type of incentive for those who choose a child free lifestyle, given the world's overpopulation and the stretching of resources. But perhaps that's off topic for this particular thread.
I got my tubal during a time where I was having exploratory surgery (lap) to try and find out why I had such agonizing monthly pain. Never did find out, but they were willing to do the tubal at the same time. Before that, I didn't know enough to insist on getting a tubal for its own sake, and the few times I brought it up, I got laughed off. If I were in that position now, I'd call Planned Parenthood and get a referral for someone who would do a tubal without age or birth rules (since the national association for GYNs used to have a "guideline" that a woman's age times her number of children had to be 120 before they'd do a tubal).
The only thing that helped the pain was being on birth control pills which didn't seem like a good plan for some 30+ years, taking hormones. I don't know what a tubal would have cost out of pocket, but it's a simple day surgery, laproscopic.
I got my tubal during a time where I was having exploratory surgery (lap) to try and find out why I had such agonizing monthly pain. Never did find out, but they were willing to do the tubal at the same time. Before that, I didn't know enough to insist on getting a tubal for its own sake, and the few times I brought it up, I got laughed off. If I were in that position now, I'd call Planned Parenthood and get a referral for someone who would do a tubal without age or birth rules (since the national association for GYNs used to have a "guideline" that a woman's age times her number of children had to be 120 before they'd do a tubal).
The only thing that helped the pain was being on birth control pills which didn't seem like a good plan for some 30+ years, taking hormones. I don't know what a tubal would have cost out of pocket, but it's a simple day surgery, laproscopic.
I have heard of people who wanted to get it done being turned down because of their age. I don't know how I feel about that? I think someone knows enough of herself to make that decision once she reaches adulthood.
I have always been CF and got a tubal ligation at age 30. I wonder why someone who claims to be firmly CF would not have a tubal or vasectomy. People wailed, "But it's so final," exactly. If you're going to marry with the understanding that you're both CF, why wouldn't you do everything possible to avoid a 'whoops?'
In a committed relationship, this is really only necessary for one of the partners. It's anatomically easier for the male. That was the rationale in my own former marriage. For years my then-wife was thrilled that I had a vasectomy; no pills, no patches, no worries; until one day, she wasn't thrilled any longer. In hindsight, I wonder if her CF stance was tentative and made out of convenience, to placate me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarbonCountyLiving
I believe insurances consider it to be an elective procedure though, unless it is medically necessary. It's not a cheap procedure, and yes, you could make the argument that it's cheaper than a child one doesn't want, but it's not cheaper than birth control.
At least for men, its fairly cheap; a vasectomy is around $500 in my part of the US.
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