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Just wondering. The chances of randomly meeting another childfree person in a normal social setting seem low.
I didn't pointedly seek out a childfree man to date. We met because we had many interests in common.l We were purely platonic friends first who became platonic best friends. Finally we became lovers. But in the developing friendship, we both discovered that neither of us wanted children.
Anyway, as one becomes older and looking for a long term romantic relationship, one that leads to marriage... one needs to make sure that the potential partner has the same life morals and life goals. If they don't, then don't proceed any further.
Otherwise, I find that childfree people tend to be well educated intellectuals who put much thought into their future. They don't want to have children unless they can raise them properly (good education, medical care, food and clothing). And if their siblings are more keen to have children, then they are often content to just be aunts and uncles. Also, people with satisfying careers tend to also not need to have children in their lives.
Again, get to know your potential partners well before beginning a romance with them. Don't just go by physical attraction.
I didn't pointedly seek out a childfree man to date. We met because we had many interests in common.l We were purely platonic friends first who became platonic best friends. Finally we became lovers. But in the developing friendship, we both discovered that neither of us wanted children.
Anyway, as one becomes older and looking for a long term romantic relationship, one that leads to marriage... one needs to make sure that the potential partner has the same life morals and life goals. If they don't, then don't proceed any further.
Otherwise, I find that childfree people tend to be well educated intellectuals who put much thought into their future. They don't want to have children unless they can raise them properly (good education, medical care, food and clothing). And if their siblings are more keen to have children, then they are often content to just be aunts and uncles. Also, people with satisfying careers tend to also not need to have children in their lives.
Again, get to know your potential partners well before beginning a romance with them. Don't just go by physical attraction.
Thanks for replying.
I also peeked on your profile; it says you are Chinese. Do your parents know that you are childfree? How did they react?
I met my future husband when we were both in High School. We married when we were 29 and 20 years later are still married.
Neither of us wanted kids and are extremely happy we never dealt with children. No regrets whatsoever, in fact we feel the opposite of regretful.
Also, with the OP saying, "the chances of two people not wanting kids is remote," is totally ridiculous. Most of my adults friends (in their 30's-40's) don't have children and have zero interest in wanting them.
I met my future husband when we were both in High School. We married when we were 29 and 20 years later are still married.
Neither of us wanted kids and are extremely happy we never dealt with children. No regrets whatsoever, in fact we feel the opposite of regretful.
Also, with the OP saying, "the chances of two people not wanting kids is remote," is totally ridiculous. Most of my adults friends (in their 30's-40's) don't have children and have zero interest in wanting them.
That's not what I said. I said that I think the chances of randomly meeting other childfree people (let alone a childfree man who is also single, straight, non-religious, non-smoker and compatible with me) in normal social settings seems low. The vast, vast majority of people want kids; that's a fact, not just my opinion. The odds are against it. You were lucky to meet your childfree husband in highschool.
My anecdotal evidence would be that online dating is extremely successful for people in general these days, so I'd be interested to see empirical evidence to the contrary.
I don't have studies to prove this but in my experience and this is just my experience, this has been the case for me.
I think, and again, this is just from my own life, keeping with those who were like-minded in this, was the way I always meet women friends who always seemed to know men who felt the same way about not wanting children.
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Originally Posted by StabbyAbby
That's not what I said. I said that I think the chances of randomly meeting other childfree people (let alone a childfree man who is also single, straight, non-religious, non-smoker and compatible with me) in normal social settings seems low. The vast, vast majority of people want kids; that's a fact, not just my opinion. The odds are against it. You were lucky to meet your childfree husband in highschool.
How high do you think it is? Lets say 80% want kids (I don't think it is that high, but that is about the percentage that have them, so lets go with that as there are lots of people that have them that didn't want them and people that want them that didn't have them). So, 4 out of 5 want kids. With those numbers, it would be very very easy to meet people that don't want kids. 1 in 5 don't! Not exactly rare. And with the fact that single people w/o kids are more likely to go out as they don't have to stay home with kids, it is probably more like 25%. Again, not uncommon at all.
A majority of people want kids, but not a vast majority. You're overstating it.
How high do you think it is? Lets say 80% want kids (I don't think it is that high, but that is about the percentage that have them, so lets go with that as there are lots of people that have them that didn't want them and people that want them that didn't have them). So, 4 out of 5 want kids. With those numbers, it would be very very easy to meet people that don't want kids. 1 in 5 don't! Not exactly rare. And with the fact that single people w/o kids are more likely to go out as they don't have to stay home with kids, it is probably more like 25%. Again, not uncommon at all.
A majority of people want kids, but not a vast majority. You're overstating it.
How is 80% not a vast majority?
I would say the percentage of the population that does want kids is around 90-95%.
There are the people who don't want kids, but end up having them anyway because of birth control failures/abortion bans/pressure from spouse, family and friends/they didn't know that not having kids at all was a real option.
Research report showed that childlessness has risen across all racial and ethnic groups, adding up to about 1 in 5 American women who end their childbearing years maternity-free, compared with 1 in 10 in the 1970s.
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