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Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iknowftbll
Her experiment is biased and flawed from the start because she's not an actual man. She wasn't dating to find a connection with these women she was collecting data. If you've ever written a master's thesis you'd know collecting data is brutal!
If you're an average looking woman and above, I think this is probably the case more often than not.
However, my best female friend is going through a terrible stretch of rejection and she's coming down very hard on herself about it. So it's not a cakewalk for all women. Last night, she was telling me she wanted to have plastic surgery to change something about herself. She's only 26 for crying out loud. A lot of women have issues with dating just like the men on here do. We just don't hear about it as much.
The difference, in my opinion, is that what you describe as your friend going through a terrible stretch is actually the default position for the majority of men, barring the extremely good looking, rich or charismatic.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,989,150 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheSmuggler
The difference, in my opinion, is that what you describe as your friend going through a terrible stretch is actually the default position for the majority of men, barring the extremely good looking, rich or charismatic.
Nope. The vast vast majority of men, from average to below average, date and have relationships. If you go outside, you'll see that. If you mingle with coworkers, you'll see that.
Very very few people have no relationship success at all.
Well, she told Ronn Owens that she would just approach them in the bar, the way a straight man would. She was just asking them out/asking them for sex and see what happens.
Talk about a low percentage approach to begin with.
Nope. The vast vast majority of men, from average to below average, date and have relationships. If you go outside, you'll see that. If you mingle with coworkers, you'll see that.
Very very few people have no relationship success at all.
Yeah, this is your opinion over and over and over again. It's your experience in the frame of being successful with women, and not surprisingly you probably therefore associate with more men who are similarly successful.
Further, I never said that most men experience no relationship success at all, I said that the default position for most men is long strings of rejections, something Lafleur's female friend is apparently unable to handle, even though those men are told to "man up" and "suck it up."
The difference, in my opinion, is that what you describe as your friend going through a terrible stretch is actually the default position for the majority of men, barring the extremely good looking, rich or charismatic.
I'm average to slightly above average, and not wealthy in the least bit and I've dated plenty of women. Not all of them were dime pieces, but my standards (in terms of physical beauty) are in check. The girl I'm dating right now is pretty cute though, and the girl I dated before her was very attractive (to me, at least).
The one valid point you may have is that a guy has to have some amount of charisma to get the attention of a girl, even if it's clumsy charisma. I don't think a guy will have much success if he struggles severely in social situations. He's, more often than not, going to be blocked out of the scene.
In the name of science...LOL....come on, that is such flawed data, a woman dressed as a man? Chalk up another study which will be used to support more men and their pursuit for excuses.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,989,150 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheSmuggler
Yeah, this is your opinion over and over and over again. It's your experience in the frame of being successful with women, and not surprisingly you probably therefore associate with more men who are similarly successful.
Further, I never said that most men experience no relationship success at all, I said that the default position for most men is long strings of rejections, something Lafleur's female friend is apparently unable to handle, even though those men are told to "man up" and "suck it up."
I'm not successful with women. Never said I was. What a crock. I get by, usually. That's not success.
Do you work? Have you worked? I do. I look around. I see that most of the guys here that are 300# (there are always some) are happily married. The guys with thick glasses and 5'3"? Happily married.
And I really have no idea how people have "long strings of rejections" constantly, unless they approach dating in some bizarre way. Some people have an occasional bad streak, but for every woman that has success, there is a guy having success. It's the way it works (for heteros).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lafleur
I'm average to slightly above average, and not wealthy in the least bit and I've dated plenty of women. Not all of them were dime pieces, but my standards (in terms of physical beauty) are in check. The girl I'm dating right now is pretty cute though, and the girl I dated before her was very attractive (to me, at least).
The one valid point you may have is that a guy has to have some amount of charisma to get the attention of a girl, even if it's clumsy charisma. I don't think a guy will have much success if he struggles severely in social situations. He's, more often than not, going to be blocked out of the scene.
I'm average to below average. Bald. Glasses. Broke. Rarely had a car (most of my adult life) and not a great body. Yet, I date. It's not hard. And I'm dorky, and often awkward, its still not hard. Challenging at times, sure, but not hard.
Location: "Silicon Valley" (part of San Francisco Bay Area, California, USA)
4,375 posts, read 4,072,463 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheSmuggler
Yeah, this is your opinion over and over and over again. It's your experience in the frame of being successful with women, and not surprisingly you probably therefore associate with more men who are similarly successful.
Eh I think he's right though. Most men are able to get girlfriends at some point. Those of us who are virgins in our late 30s are in a very small minority.
Sometimes I am tempted to just give up and go the casual route...although I'm not attractive enough for it and I would probably have to just sleep with prostitutes only. But I will never do that because it defeats the purpose of waiting for something meaningful. If I'm just going to have casual sex, that doesn't give me anything I can't get from myself. Plus it introduces the risk of STDs; my risk right now is near zero.
Like I said I don't know if I will ever be in a relationship...probably not, at this point. Depressing but true.
Yeah, this is your opinion over and over and over again. It's your experience in the frame of being successful with women, and not surprisingly you probably therefore associate with more men who are similarly successful.
Further, I never said that most men experience no relationship success at all, I said that the default position for most men is long strings of rejections, something Lafleur's female friend is apparently unable to handle, even though those men are told to "man up" and "suck it up."
But you don't know that's true for "most" men. At best you can say "many" but you still lack a qualifier. What is "many?" 10 out of 100? What is a long stretch? A month? A week? Three straight rejections on three straight attempts spread out over a year?
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