Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Aye. No emotional connection with another human being except for parents? That's not "asexuality." That's sociopathy, and it comes from a lack of empathy. Good luck with that.
First, I'm crying for attention and now I'm a sociopath? Nice armchair psychology there. I realize that you're ticked off that the other members here didn't respond to my thread with the vitriol that you think that I deserve, but to use words that I know you'll understand- tough noogs.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by AtkinsonDan
I think a distinction here has to be made between total strangers and familiar strangers. I agree that it is impossible to develop a connection with a total stranger but in the case of a familiar stranger (defined as a stranger one sees on a regular basis) it may be possible to become strongly attracted to them due to their mannerisms and demeanor.
I don't agree with you at all. If you see someone around (lets say you're in the same class) and don't interact with them and get to know them, you're still basing any so called attraction on how you think they would be when interacting with you. That is still fantasy. You're becoming strongly attracted to who you think they are based on your observations.
Last edited by timberline742; 05-09-2015 at 07:41 PM..
I don't agree with you at all. If you see someone around (lets say you're in the same class) and don't interact with them and get to know them, you're still basing any so called attraction on how you think they would be when interacting with you. That is still fantasy. You're becoming strongly attracted to who you think they are based on your observations.
There's a man at work whose name I don't know and I only see him in passing every now and then, but he always smiles and greets me. I know nothing about him, but I'd say I have a little crush on him. I don't think about him when I don't see him, but I'm always happy when I do see him just because I find him attractive. I don't really think of it as fantasy because I don't fantasize about him.
I have another male coworker who I've had lots of long, personal conversations with. I always enjoy talking to him because we have some of the same interests and he's very easy to talk to. We make each other laugh. He has given me compliments at times during our chats. I think he's a great guy, he's fit, and he's not bad looking, but I don't have a romantic interest in him whereas I'm pretty sure I have an interest in the other guy without knowing him at all just based on the feeling I have when I see him.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
There's a man at work whose name I don't know and I only see him in passing every now and then, but he always smiles and greets me. I know nothing about him, but I'd say I have a little crush on him. I don't think about him when I don't see him, but I'm always happy when I do see him just because I find him attractive. I don't really think of it as fantasy because I don't fantasize about him.
Crushes are for kids fantasizing. But what is this "crush" based on other than a nice smile and physique/looks?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
I have another male coworker who I've had lots of long, personal conversations with. I always enjoy talking to him because we have some of the same interests and he's very easy to talk to. We make each other laugh. He has given me compliments at times during our chats. I think he's a great guy, he's fit, and he's not bad looking, but I don't have a romantic interest in him whereas I'm pretty sure I have an interest in the other guy without knowing him at all just based on the feeling I have when I see him.
Well just because you get along with someone doesn't mean you will have an interest in him. Sounds like a friend. A minority of people you interact with and are friendly with will result in romantic interests in.
The real flag is when there is NO ONE, for a decade plus, where when you get to know them (really get to know them) and like talking to them that there is no romantic interest (physical and emotional interest).
Crushes are for kids fantasizing. But what is this "crush" based on other than a nice smile and physique/looks?
Well, he's attractive and seems like a nice man. That's enough for me because all a crush means is that I would be interested in going on a date with him- not that I want to marry him.
Quote:
Well just because you get along with someone doesn't mean you will have an interest in him. Sounds like a friend. A minority of people you interact with and are friendly with will result in romantic interests in.
The real flag is when there is NO ONE, for a decade plus, where when you get to know them (really get to know them) and like talking to them that there is no romantic interest (physical and emotional interest).
I would say that I've really gotten to know and liked talking to two men in my lifetime, and no, there wasn't romantic interest from the start nor did any ever develop on my part. I've never really gotten to know any man who I found attractive. I've only known them casually.
First, I'm crying for attention and now I'm a sociopath? Nice armchair psychology there. I realize that you're ticked off that the other members here didn't respond to my thread with the vitriol that you think that I deserve, but to use words that I know you'll understand- tough noogs.
I don't get why everyone is on your case. Not everyone is a serial dater and wants to be buddy buddy with everyone they see.
I don't get why everyone is on your case. Not everyone is a serial dater and wants to be buddy buddy with everyone they see.
Exactly what I was thinking.
I don't see an issue with the OP, if this it what she feels she needs to do, that is her prerogative. She just probably felt comfortable sharing it with us since she has been on here this long.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
I would say that I've really gotten to know and liked talking to two men in my lifetime, and no, there wasn't romantic interest from the start nor did any ever develop on my part. I've never really gotten to know any man who I found attractive. I've only known them casually.
So you've never REALLY felt attraction to someone. Real attraction.
I don't get why everyone is on your case. Not everyone is a serial dater and wants to be buddy buddy with everyone they see.
I think too much was read into me saying that I have issues connecting with people. It doesn't mean I've never had friends. I just meant that I don't get so close with people to the point that I feel the need to be involved in their lives constantly and socialize with them all the time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742
So you've never REALLY felt attraction to someone. Real attraction.
That makes me sad.
Not real attraction to the point that we both knew each other well and it was more than just physical.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
Not real attraction to the point that we both knew each other well and it was more than just physical.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I realize that you're ticked off that the other members here didn't respond to my thread with the vitriol that you think that I deserve, but to use words that I know you'll understand- tough noogs.
