My girlfriend takes 30-60 minute showers (husband, sex, calling, responsible)

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by CNYC

Whoa......

Not for nothing but didn't you feel gross ?

For what, for bathing every day? Or did you only read my post as far as you quoted, and skipped the rest?

[Charles22]

Does she do this everyday? Maybe she's a mermaid.

[luzianne]

Originally Posted by Malloric

Pretty easy, actually. You don't need the water running when you're shaving or shampooing your hair or scrubbing your body anymore than you need the water running when you're brushing your teeth. Install a Navy shower head and it's pretty easy to shower in 2-3 minutes if you're so inclined. It's really not that relevant. Domestic water use is only about 8-9% of total clean water withdrawals anyway. You'd make a much bigger difference by changing diet and eating less meat and dairy than by taking quicker showers.

You must not have understood my post. I have thick hair. Most of my shower time is spent with water running onto my hair, first to get it wet enough to put shampoo in it and then to rinse shampoo out. 2-3 minutes wouldn't even begin to be enough time. If you have short, thin hair, that would work. If you don't, it's not going to work.

Drought isn't an issue where I am unless we have a really hot summer and then we are told not to water our lawns.

[CNYC]

Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth

When I lived in CA, I would shower twice/week (when I needed to wash my hair, so the shower served dual-purpose and was therefore longer than a quick shower, though nowhere near 1/2 hr.), and would dry-wash the rest of the time, meaning--with a washcloth at the sink. This system, btw, is what I'd heard was common in Europe.

^^^ Is this what you were referring to ?

YES a bird bath is just as gross and should only be done when there isn't a shower available.....like in prison!

You do know that the French (Europe) are not known to be as hygienic as Americans ?

We don't date or spend time in the same room together so I really don't care. However I am amazed at what people think "CLEAN" really means. A dry bath over a sink is not clean. How do you wash your feet ?

[barryg]

Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth

Do you want to be with a gf who's that rude to you, OP?

But as for the shower issue, does she take these marathon showers every day? Twice/week? When I lived in CA, I would shower twice/week (when I needed to wash my hair, so the shower served dual-purpose and was therefore longer than a quick shower, though nowhere near 1/2 hr.), and would dry-wash the rest of the time, meaning--with a washcloth at the sink. This system, btw, is what I'd heard was common in Europe. So I figured that the water I saved on my non-shower days made up my water allowance on the shower days.

Outside of this issue, how do you get along with her? Any other areas of friction? Has she ever been rude to you before, and just written you off like that? Seems like a small red flag, something to keep an eye on, but you be the judge.

We get along otherwise fine. And I don't know if she takes them this long all the time but it seems like it. But I could be wrong. The other night I watched the news for an hour with her son. And the water was running seemingly the entire time. I didn't time it. But I just can't believe how long she runs the shower.

I mentioned it to her before but she happily sort of blew it off and I decided to ignore it. The other night I guess I noticed it more b/c I was going to shower after the news and she was still in there under the shower.

That's when we had our little "confrontation". It's not about the shower. It's about respect. Hard to respect someone who doesn't care about the drought and that "I've always taken 40 min showers." With the drought going on, to me that's ignorant and selfish.

Like I said maybe not all are this long and great if they're not. Last night she was in the shower for 15 min: the shortest time I've ever seen for her.

I'm the last guy to be a nag or control somebody. Sorry, it just urks me. Like I said....it's hard to love ignorance sometimes.

[CSD610]

Originally Posted by barryg

My girlfriend has many wonderful qualities and I love her. But being that we are in a drought, I find her long showers usually average at least 30 min and are often longer, pretty unconscionable. Last night after another one of her marathon showers, I said you know we have a severe drought. 45 minutes is too long. And while I take 5 min showers, I do realize women have more to do in there. She said "I'll shower as long as I want." And then something to the effect of "you didn't have to move in if you don't like it."

Meanwhile I pay 70% of the rent, since I earn much more than her. I was really put off by her comment. I don't like to find arguments but I'm really turned off by her selfishness in this regard. It makes me wonder if she even knows how bad a drought we have? Not that her actions alone are using up all our water, but it's still not right in my opinion.

By the way, we're both in out 40s.
Thoughts?

This should be in the relationships part of the forum and your girlfriend is right, you did not have to move in with her so take your 70% of everything and get your own place and shower how you want and see her when/if you want to.

PS ~~ Tell HER again you don't like her actions, no one here can do anything about her water use.

[CSD610]

Originally Posted by luzianne

You must not have understood my post. I have thick hair. Most of my shower time is spent with water running onto my hair, first to get it wet enough to put shampoo in it and then to rinse shampoo out. 2-3 minutes wouldn't even begin to be enough time. If you have short, thin hair, that would work. If you don't, it's not going to work.

Drought isn't an issue where I am unless we have a really hot summer and then we are told not to water our lawns.

Not true at all, my hair was down to my behind and very thick and my showers were about 7 minutes long, including washing my hair and body and rinsing both completely.
When you have 12 gallons of hot water and not a drop more you learn very quickly how to be efficient when in the shower.

[cattusbabe]

Wonder if she was taking those long showers when she was paying the water bill?

[expatCA]

Originally Posted by barryg

We get along otherwise fine. And I don't know if she takes them this long all the time but it seems like it. But I could be wrong. The other night I watched the news for an hour with her son. And the water was running seemingly the entire time. I didn't time it. But I just can't believe how long she runs the shower.

I mentioned it to her before but she happily sort of blew it off and I decided to ignore it. The other night I guess I noticed it more b/c I was going to shower after the news and she was still in there under the shower.

That's when we had our little "confrontation". It's not about the shower. It's about respect. Hard to respect someone who doesn't care about the drought and that "I've always taken 40 min showers." With the drought going on, to me that's ignorant and selfish.

Like I said maybe not all are this long and great if they're not. Last night she was in the shower for 15 min: the shortest time I've ever seen for her.

I'm the last guy to be a nag or control somebody. Sorry, it just urks me. Like I said....it's hard to love ignorance sometimes.

She is trying to keep your bill for water down. In many areas now the conservation is causing the bills to go up.

[sdurbanite]

If you get rid of the hand held massager nozzle, I bet she'll be out of the shower in 10 minutes or less!