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If you purchase something, bring it home and leave it somewhere it belongs, not hidden, but not obvious, after it's been there for at least 48 hours when your wife brings it up you can say "that old thing? I've had that for a while…."
Personally I wouldn't ask, I'd just bring it home, but 1.) I love bikes and have had them since I was a kid and 2) that might be part of why I'm divorced now…...
LOL. There are many people who are telling OP not to get a bike because they're not safe. Many of these posters sound like they've never ridden on one. Even if you have, I'll remind you guys of this. The purpose of life is to live. We should enjoy life; otherwise, what's the point of it? Riding motorcycles is riskier than driving cars, but there is no way to duplicate the feeling of riding a bike by driving a silly convertible. It's just not the same. Riding a motorcycle feels great. It's not the same drudgery of driving that you get from schlepping back and forth to wherever in your car/truck/SUV.
As for the fate of OP's brother-in-law, although that's a tragedy, that has no bearing on what will happen to OP if he rides. OP's fate is his fate, and it is independent of his BIL's. I suggest you keep working on her, OP. If you really want a bike, try to convince her. Tell her you'll take the necessary safety classes, and that you'll make safety a priority.
If she agrees, here are a few safety pointers my ex-husband, an avid motorcycle rider, taught me. He and his brother rode for 20+ years in the crazy streets of Houston and never had an accident. ALWAYS WEAR A HELMET. And I'm not talking about the half helmets. Wear a full head helmet with the face shield. It offers far better protection than half helmets. Don't speed, use your signals, be aware of other drivers (who often can't see you,) and don't split lanes. A loud motor on your bike is a plus, not a minus, because drivers who can't see you can hear you coming at least. Cruisers are easier for some people to ride than crotch rockets, so you might want to start with one of those. Happy riding!
So I guess the OP is admitting he has replaced his mommy with his wife. Men in the USA have sure become wimps. They have to get permission from their wives to do anything. Does your wife get your permission? Anyhow, I've owned several bikes and still ride, even though I'm past 60. Its very safe, if you follow certain rules. I avoid riding in heavy traffic, like rush hour or at night. Also, you have to ride as though they're out to get you, because many drivers aren't very good. The very old and very young drivers are the worst and most dangerous. But I encourage you to get one, if you don't have children. When my kids came, I gave it up. The last thing I wanted to do was leave my small children without their father. Once I had the last one well on his way in college, I bought another bike.
Yeah, I also find it sad that society has more or less created this false belief that husbands need permission from their wives to do things.
She is not the boss of your hobbies, dangerous or not. If you have the money, a motorcycle is your choice and she literally has no say.
However, I will note that you should on your own weigh the risks, especially if you have children.
So it's Ok to be concerned about the potential dangerous outcome when it comes to the kids but not so for the wife?
Yes, apparently if you have kids it matters, but if you have a wife, particularly one who lost her brother in a bike accident, she's just a control freak and she and her emotional issues can fend for themselves.
Yes, apparently if you have kids it matters, but if you have a wife, particularly one who lost her brother in a bike accident, she's just a control freak and she and her emotional issues can fend for themselves.
Yeah. Some people tend to be that way with kids. They matter, but the spouse doesn't.
I recall a post here years ago. A married man with kids.
If he and his kids were in danger, he'd try to save them, risking his life. But he says if it's just he and his wife in danger, he'd leave her and save himself.
If she agrees, here are a few safety pointers my ex-husband, an avid motorcycle rider, taught me. He and his brother rode for 20+ years in the crazy streets of Houston and never had an accident. ALWAYS WEAR A HELMET. And I'm not talking about the half helmets. Wear a full head helmet with the face shield. It offers far better protection than half helmets. Don't speed, use your signals, be aware of other drivers (who often can't see you,) and don't split lanes. A loud motor on your bike is a plus, not a minus, because drivers who can't see you can hear you coming at least. Cruisers are easier for some people to ride than crotch rockets, so you might want to start with one of those. Happy riding!
Interesting. Your ex-husband believes one should always wear a helmet. Why? How would he know? He's never had an accident! I was wearing a (full face) helmet the day I fell off my bike at 55mph and it was pretty scuffed up when I looked at it afterwards. I agree with your husband, helmets are indeed a good idea. I did plenty of speeding in the month or so after I got the hang of it all, and ironically, I was not speeding the day I had my accident.
People throw out stuff and some of it makes sense, but often its just put out there without any science or logic. Like loud pipes. Drivers hate loud motorcycles and they may not treat you right in a clutch situation where they are supposed to yield right of way and... Cruisers are not easier to ride, it just seems that way because you are more comfortable. A crotch rocket is optimized for handling and speed, 'easier' is very relative. Its clear that your ex-husband had opinions formed by his own experience with bikes and he has passed them on to you.
Like splitting lanes. In Houston, probably questionable. In California, however, thousands of bikers do it daily without incident. It looks gnarly, but it's an integral part of the road culture there. One cannot stay in one part of a diverse place like the U.S. and make blanket pronouncements for all to observe. I think the main reason the o.p. should pass on the bike thing is age. You could start playing the violin at age 40 and you probably won't kill anyone or yourself. You won't get very good, but, its fairly benign as far as a pointless waste of time and money in pursuit of a missed opportunity of youth. Motorcycle riding relies on built in reflexes and spatial awareness skills that are best learned in youth. Not at all saying it can't be done. There is always going to be some frustrating point killing example that defies the odds. And? What? No, you are not going to be that person. If you have a wife telling you you shouldn't do something, that is IMO more than proof enough that you waited too long to get 'er done. She wouldn't have a word to say about it one way or another if you had already been doing it when the two of you met.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VanillaChocolate
Yeah. Some people tend to be that way with kids. They matter, but the spouse doesn't.
I recall a post here years ago. A married man with kids.
If he and his kids were in danger, he'd try to save them, risking his life. But he says if it's just he and his wife in danger, he'd leave her and save himself.
Though it is not popular, I kind of understand where that line of thinking comes from. If you are a parent, it is your responsibility to fight for your kids since they don't have the capacity to fight for themselves. A spouse, presumably they would have the capacity to fight for themselves as an adult. Now I think, in the perfect world you'd fight for your spouse but I would not judge anyone if in the face of death they chose to let the spouse fend for themselves but I'd have a lot of contempt of they left children to fend for themselves because they don't have the capacity to fend for themselves.
That's why I posted them previously in this thread and quoted from them.
Glad to know you didn't look at them when you responded.
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Yeah, I also find it sad that society has more or less created this false belief that husbands need permission from their wives to do things.
As a married woman have the right to do anything I want that's legal and not against my wedding vows, as does my husband.
As a HAPPILY married couple, we tend to "ask" each other before we do things that we know may be a problem. Riding motorcycles and cutting off all our hair fall within the "ask" parameters.
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As a married woman have the right to do anything I want that's legal and not against my wedding vows, as does my husband.
As a HAPPILY married couple, we tend to "ask" each other before we do things that we know may be a problem. Riding motorcycles and cutting off all our hair fall within the "ask" parameters.
Exactly. What I find odd in these threads is so many people who view a spouse as an adversary, not an ally.
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