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It comes from when you are a guy and you go out with female friends that they get approached by other guys more often than not.
We can't see what happens to them when we're not there.
You're so predictable! I knew you'd jump in the convo after my post, saying exactly what you said here. I almost added to my post: "Cue Timberline, to jump in and post that the women he dates get hit on constantly".
We know, Timber. You hang out with exceptional women. They live in a different world from many of the rest of us.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 37,016,353 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
You're so predictable! I knew you'd jump in the convo after my post, saying exactly what you said here. I almost added to my post: "Cue Timberline, to jump in and post that the women he dates get hit on constantly".
We know, Timber. You hang out with exceptional women. They live in a different world from many of the rest of us.
Well, I think they're exceptional people, they're my friends. But as far as looks? They're the normal range of people. Some cute, some not so cute, everything in between.
Lots of women I know have joined women's only specific groups (surrounding various interests) just so they can go out and socialize and get involved in activities that interest them without getting hit on all the time.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,701 posts, read 41,779,199 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
You're so predictable! I knew you'd jump in the convo after my post, saying exactly what you said here. I almost added to my post: "Cue Timberline, to jump in and post that the women he dates get hit on constantly".
We know, Timber. You hang out with exceptional women. They live in a different world from many of the rest of us.
Thank you, about time someone said YMMV to his posts.
I guess this explains the deafening silence when most women go out in public. I don't know where this idea that women are overwhelmed with male attention as soon as they step out the door comes from. TV? Movies? Certainly not real life, with a few exceptions, depending on the woman.
Media may play a part in it, for some people. Not all.
Sometimes, things are skewed depending on location and what you're used to seeing. It's like someone who grows up in a rich family, in a high-end expensive neighborhood. They're used to that kind of thing. So if they went someplace that was simply average middle-class, that would look poor to them, even though it's decent and very standard.
So, lets say you're above average -looks or personality -if not both, or hang out with people who are, you think their lives are average and standard, when it really isn't. It's exceptional.
Some women are probably getting approached and asked out whenever they leave home. Or they always have a string of people around them. If not their looks, they have above average charisma and magnetic charm that draws people to them. So they get more positive or special feedback. But the more average people in looks and personality aren't beating people off of them.
Average all-around people date and get married everyday. But did they have strings of great options, or tons of people going out of their way for them, or approaching so much they had to try and avoid it. Chances are good, they didn't.
Last edited by HappyRain; 12-19-2016 at 11:18 AM..
I appreciate the compliment Teige...BUT I'll give you a play by play of what ACTUALLY happens when I go out:
My friends and I go out quite a bit when we're at school, and we go to the mall a lot.
One day in particular, we went to see a friend who worked there but he didn't get off for a while. We walked through the entire mall, and what I notice is that guys DO look but they don't say anything. So this notion that we get hounded is just simply not true. I'm sure some guys may WANT to approach but the don't for various reasons.
The type of person I am, I assume most guys are involved with someone due to my own personal experiences. I'm not complaining though. When I go somewhere I really just want to handle my business and leave.
Well you're getting hit on /approached in CDR land, isn't this just like real life?
Even then, that doesn't always work in her favor (if she doesn't want to be bothered).
To me it is a dead giveaway if a woman doesn't want to be bothered. If she doesn't smile at me or looks annoyed when I introduce myself then I back off. I won't approach any woman if it looks like she will bite my head off.
Lots of women I know have joined women's only specific groups (surrounding various interests) just so they can go out and socialize and get involved in activities that interest them without getting hit on all the time.
Talk about first-world problems... "getting hit on all the time."
It's like a person who's never worried about being unemployed complaining to the unemployed that they have to waste their time deleting never-ending job offers in their e-mail account. Sure, it can be a pain in the butt, but it sure beats the alternative.
The flip side are those articles about how women "feel invisible after 50." So basically, women want men to psychically know exactly when, where and how to approach them, and be exactly what she's attracted to, and do it on her timetable.
Talk about first-world problems... "getting hit on all the time."
It's like a person who's never worried about being unemployed complaining to the unemployed that they have to waste their time deleting never-ending job offers in their e-mail account. Sure, it can be a pain in the butt, but it sure beats the alternative.
The flip side are those articles about how women "feel invisible after 50." So basically, women want men to psychically know exactly when, where and how to approach them, and be exactly what she's attracted to, and do it on her timetable.
To be fair, it was a man claiming this is what women he knows does and telling us this is how they feel about it. The actual women who have answered the thread so far, including one absolutely beautiful woman, are answering "not in my world" (the constant "hitting-on," that is), so...yeah.
Before you get all cranky about us women and our first-world whining you should realize that it isn't the women here doing so.
How annoying...
When you do hear a woman say she wishes she could have been left alone rather than approached by Random Unsavory Character X, it's because he was inappropriate about it - NOT bothering to notice she was literally putting her head down and avoiding eye contact, etc. And you know what? A man forcing his way into a woman's space and refusing to allow her to make the decision not to be bothered IS a problem; when taken to an extreme, there's actually a legal term for that. So..."first world problems" my butt. How dare you? Exactly how many times have YOU been frightened by a person much larger and more muscular than you breathing directly into your space and pushing himself at you because deep down he just knows you really want it and you're about to "stop being an ice queen" and just "give it up" any minute?
You know, getting back to a bit more seriousness here...I agree with this, actually. Guys do look. I never took that to mean I was special and/or they "wanted" me, though, due to what Aurelia ^ is saying here. It seems (seems...I don't know for sure) that it's more a case of: guys seem to tend to just look around and check women out overall in a visual way as a sort of natural thing without necessarily thinking of them as someone to ask out.
If that makes sense.
So...that's still not an approach and it may not even be interest beyond "nice (whatevers)" or...whatever.
I don't know, just a thought. Anyway, the bottom line is that it would be nice to think getting looks means we're attractive but I just don't think of it that way because it appears so indiscriminate and sort of cold/assessing.
i agree it shouldnt count as an approch the same way when a woman looks/smiles/hovers around waiting for them man to say hi/.. dont count as approaches either.
i consciously try not to look because i dont want to be the pervert staring at ******* and booty.
i have a feeling most men check out most women that way.
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