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Ok, Stepdad. You have a low opinion of both your wife and her children. You're never going to turn loose of these irritations. Clearly, you're a hard ass.
You only have two options. Get over it or divorce her. Your wife may be right or wrong. It doesn't matter. These are her children. She feels they are more important than you are. In a way, they are, because you have made a huge ultimatum. You're a conditional father, based only on performance.
As a parent, nothing is worse than waiting on your daughters to get home at night. It doesn't matter how old they are, we still worry. If they can't respect our boundaries in exchange for free room and board, it's disrespectful.
That's the crux of the issue. They, and their mother, are disrespectful.
I also have 3 daughters and I also have a blended family. Honestly, I don't think it's disrespectful at all to not want to be home by 11pm. I would never expect that of my daughters- or any other grown adult. It's just not reasonable. As I said before, I highly doubt that the vast majority of 20 year olds would be able to keep such strict hours.
I also have 3 daughters and I also have a blended family. Honestly, I don't think it's disrespectful at all to not want to be home by 11pm. I would never expect that of my daughters- or any other grown adult. It's just not reasonable. As I said before, I highly doubt that the vast majority of 20 year olds would be able to keep such strict hours.
Disagree.
I know several parents who have children in their late teens/early twenties who set similar restrictions. The children may not like it, but they have the option to move out, which is really the point.
The objective is to get the children to grow up and begin their own lives. Otherwise, you risk having your children live with you into their late twenties and beyond. While that may be a growing trend, it's certainly not ideal or, I'm sure, what the parents would prefer.
Ok, Stepdad. You have a low opinion of both your wife and her children. You're never going to turn loose of these irritations. Clearly, you're a hard ass.
You only have two options. Get over it or divorce her. Your wife may be right or wrong. It doesn't matter. These are her children. She feels they are more important than you are. In a way, they are, because you have made a huge ultimatum. You're a conditional father, based only on performance.
I doubt you'll change.
Uh oh OP...the Sisterhood is circling the wagons! Get out now while the going is good!
I also have 3 daughters and I also have a blended family. Honestly, I don't think it's disrespectful at all to not want to be home by 11pm. I would never expect that of my daughters- or any other grown adult. It's just not reasonable. As I said before, I highly doubt that the vast majority of 20 year olds would be able to keep such strict hours.
Perhaps not in this day and age, but I was brought up that when you live under someone else's roof for free, it is not up to you to decide what you want, what you will, and what you won't do. You do what is asked, or you go get your own place.
I know several parents who have children in their late teens/early twenties who set similar restrictions. The children may not like it, but they have the option to move out, which is really the point.
The objective is to get the children to grow up and begin their own lives. Otherwise, you risk having your children live with you into their late twenties and beyond. While that may be a growing trend, it's certainly not ideal or, I'm sure, what the parents would prefer.
Sometimes love is tough.
No offense, but I don't believe you. I don't believe you know several parents that set and enforce an 11pm curfew on grown adults.
No offense, but I don't believe you. I don't believe you know several parents that set and enforce an 11pm curfew on grown adults.
And I don't believe that you don't know anyone that has adults living at home that don't expect them to come home at a decent hour as long as they are living under their roof.
Perhaps not in this day and age, but I was brought up that when you live under someone else's roof for free, it is not up to you to decide what you want, what you will, and what you won't do. You do what is asked, or you go get your own place.
How old are you? When I was in my late teens 25 years ago I knew no one that was required to keep those kind of strict hours.
No offense, but I don't believe you. I don't believe you know several parents that set and enforce an 11pm curfew on grown adults.
I'm sorry if you don't believe me, but that's not my issue.
Adults are adults not when they reach 18, but when they take responsibility for their own lives. When I was in my late teens and was home from school over the summer, I had certain restrictions I had to adhere while there. Did I like it? No, but I was raised to respect my parents and did so when I was living under their care.
While I agree 11pm is a little early, that is the decision of the parents and not subject to outside approval. It may not be your choice, but as long as the parents were paying rent/food/utilities, it is up to the tenants/daughters to comply.
And I don't believe that you don't know anyone that has adults living at home that don't expect them to come home at a decent hour as long as they are living under their roof.
How old are your girls?
A decent hour, sure. But 11pm every night? No way. That means no hanging out with friends, no working late, heck even my gym is open until that time and most people close it down.
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