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There are 2,133,971 members on C-D. Let's guess about half women (rounded up) 1,066,986, but how many post in the Relationships forum? And are active in recent history? Less than a few hundred, maybe even less than a hundred.
Now how many women are there in the world? Roughly 3.72 billion.
There is no hive mind dude. I could give you responses that prove the point that NOT ALL WOMEN think or do a certain thing...and find several others here who agree with me, but I'm not exactly typical of women here or anywhere. I can speak up just to say that a thing is not impossible. Clearly, if I am living it, it is POSSIBLE. That doesn't make it likely.
You need to stop expecting women, like ANY woman here or anywhere, to be a spokesperson who was elected to represent the female gender. None of us are.
There are 2,133,971 members on C-D. Let's guess about half women (rounded up) 1,066,986, but how many post in the Relationships forum? And are active in recent history? Less than a few hundred, maybe even less than a hundred.
Now how many women are there in the world? Roughly 3.72 billion.
There is no hive mind dude. I could give you responses that prove the point that NOT ALL WOMEN think or do a certain thing...and find several others here who agree with me, but I'm not exactly typical of women here or anywhere. I can speak up just to say that a thing is not impossible. Clearly, if I am living it, it is POSSIBLE. That doesn't make it likely.
You need to stop expecting women, like ANY woman here or anywhere, to be a spokesperson who was elected to represent the female gender. None of us are.
There is no hive mind.
Well, as always my analysis and observations of CD are kicking in. A lot of the women do seem to agree with each other on here on a regular basis. I don't too often see women debating each other they usually seem to collectively agree with each other, and when they disagree with men, they collectively disagree. I'd like to see a wider variety of opinions from women on here honestly and some more diversity. I don't know if I'd call it a hive mind but probably just more of a lack of diversity of opinions than anything.
Well, as always my analysis and observations of CD are kicking in. A lot of the women do seem to agree with each other on here on a regular basis. I don't too often see women debating each other they usually seem to collectively agree with each other, and when they disagree with men, they collectively disagree. I'd like to see a wider variety of opinions from women on here honestly and some more diversity. I don't know if I'd call it a hive mind but probably just more of a lack of diversity of opinions than anything.
You call it "lack of diversity of opinions," I call it "consensus."
We are fortunate to have a large number of women here (and men too) who can see through the bull**** we've seen over and over again from posters whose problems are so uniformly repetitive (like the ubiquitous "kissless virgins" and "how can I access females" posts) that our responses could almost be automated.
Stay off toxic internet sites. Get to know women as friends. Use the phone instead of text every once in awhile. If she doesn't want sex with you she's not into you. Women are not alien creatures but diverse human beings. You are totally overthinking. Love is not a mathematical formula. And the ever popular, find a therapist.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,995,252 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
You call it "lack of diversity of opinions," I call it "consensus."
We are fortunate to have a large number of women here (and men too) who can see through the bull**** we've seen over and over again from posters whose problems are so uniformly repetitive (like the ubiquitous "kissless virgins" and "how can I access females" posts) that our responses could almost be automated.
Stay off toxic internet sites. Get to know women as friends. Use the phone instead of text every once in awhile. If she doesn't want sex with you she's not into you. Women are not alien creatures but diverse human beings. You are totally overthinking. Love is not a mathematical formula. And the ever popular, find a therapist.
Heck, even if she does want to have sex with you she may not be into you. Keep that in mind to.
You call it "lack of diversity of opinions," I call it "consensus."
We are fortunate to have a large number of women here (and men too) who can see through the bull**** we've seen over and over again from posters whose problems are so uniformly repetitive (like the ubiquitous "kissless virgins" and "how can I access females" posts) that our responses could almost be automated.
Stay off toxic internet sites. Get to know women as friends. Use the phone instead of text every once in awhile. If she doesn't want sex with you she's not into you. Women are not alien creatures but diverse human beings. You are totally overthinking. Love is not a mathematical formula. And the ever popular, find a therapist.
I'm not really talking about those threads you should still see a wider variety of opinions on average. I don't see 20 women in RL always agreeing with each other, all the time, lol. I'd see to see some op-ed's to mix it up a little, maybe some new posters, etc.
Did you get most of your info from the media and the internet?
or...
Are you seeing this stuff happen IRL (particularly in your area?)
both. I was a bouncer on and off for 20+ years, I would see couples all the time, plus I love polls and surveys on these subjects and how different they are from what or see in forums like this one.
I agree with a lot that was said in this forum (about letting the media twist your perception of reality, that things in life aren't extremes or absolutes, and getting away from just using Apps to find someone).
But that aside, I think part of the reason the women on the relationship forum are different is that, it seems to me, most of us are in relationships (married or long term relationships). A lot of the men who post are single and looking. Of course there are exceptions, but it seems like the majority of men fall into the single category and the majority of women are in the coupled up category. That's going to have a huge influence on the answers you get here.
For example, a woman looking for a LTR or is in one values a committed, loyal, heart-of-gold man. So of course that's what the women here are going to tell you they want. A woman just looking for a fun time and nothing really serious might be more inclined to someone with a lot of money to spend on a good time. Both are telling the truth.
So if a guy looks at a media story or poll based on the answers from a group of party girls who just wanna have fun and then asks a bunch of married women who are committed relationships if they feel the same way, of course he's going to get different answers. The party girls are thinking of themselves and fun... the married women are thinking of their relationships and commitment.
I also think it's kind of telling that the married men here... or the ones in committed relationships also seem to agree with the married/committed women for the most part. Probably because of shared values.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,995,252 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by cyphorx
both. I was a bouncer on and off for 20+ years, I would see couples all the time, plus I love polls and surveys on these subjects and how different they are from what or see in forums like this one.
This is a big case of seeing a small segment of society and thinking it is the norm. I can't even recall the last time I went to place that had bouncers. Even in my 20s it was pretty uncommon. The places with bouncers were bigger bars/nightclubs/often meatmarkets, and a pretty small percentage of the population goes to those places.
Well, as always my analysis and observations of CD are kicking in. A lot of the women do seem to agree with each other on here on a regular basis. I don't too often see women debating each other they usually seem to collectively agree with each other, and when they disagree with men, they collectively disagree. I'd like to see a wider variety of opinions from women on here honestly and some more diversity. I don't know if I'd call it a hive mind but probably just more of a lack of diversity of opinions than anything.
I think your memory is over-simplifying what goes on, and is glossing over the differences we do sometimes have with each other, when responding to OP's. For example, in troubled marriages, some women here will say "walk", while others will say "you need marriage counseling". But zentropa is also right, in that there are certain repeat situations, where everyone basically says, "GET A LIFE!" lol
But to use one of this thread's OP's examples, of course women here are going to be in agreement, that most women in the world aren't as interested in $$, "hypergamy" and "gold-digging" as many of the unhappy misfits and trolls who find their way to CD-R are convinced they are. Women want to be listened to, and valued. Of COURSE they want a guy with "a heart of gold". Who doesn't want that in a partner? I can't imagine why it would be surprising to find agreement on that point.
You call it "lack of diversity of opinions," I call it "consensus."
We are fortunate to have a large number of women here (and men too) who can see through the bull**** we've seen over and over again from posters whose problems are so uniformly repetitive (like the ubiquitous "kissless virgins" and "how can I access females" posts) that our responses could almost be automated.
Stay off toxic internet sites. Get to know women as friends. Use the phone instead of text every once in awhile. If she doesn't want sex with you she's not into you. Women are not alien creatures but diverse human beings. You are totally overthinking. Love is not a mathematical formula. And the ever popular, find a therapist.
True.
And I'm cool with several of the male posters here. Some aren't nearly as active anymore, but there's definitely a handful that don't make it a habit of spewing nonsense. Also consider backgrounds and worldviews shape members' thought processes and responses.
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and "gold-digging" as many of the unhappy misfits and trolls who find their way to CD-R are convinced they are. Women want to be listened to, and valued. Of COURSE they want a guy with "a heart of gold". Who doesn't want that in a partner? I can't imagine why it would be surprising to find agreement on that point.
