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Well, as always my analysis and observations of CD are kicking in. A lot of the women do seem to agree with each other on here on a regular basis. I don't too often see women debating each other they usually seem to collectively agree with each other, and when they disagree with men, they collectively disagree. I'd like to see a wider variety of opinions from women on here honestly and some more diversity. I don't know if I'd call it a hive mind but probably just more of a lack of diversity of opinions than anything.
Uh...lol... As a woman posting on CD-R...nuh-uh! I have been the odd one out with the unpopular opinion and unusual worldview so many times, I almost feel a need to disclaimer it in many of my posts! I've even gotten into some slightly vociferous tangles with a few of the ladies here. I've been scolded!
I have vast differences of opinion with some, and I'm a little more closely aligned with a very few. But I am not here to represent "women" or "females"...only myself. But I believe that just because I am not the norm, doesn't mean that I am invalidated, that the only valid positions come from those in the majority. I'm one woman out of 3.72 billion, and my life story is just as legit as any of 'em.
Also, this thing you are saying, is a bit contradictory. You say you're looking for diversity in feminine opinion, yet you're talking about patterns you've seen here and elsewhere. Sounds to me like you're looking for patterns, and overlooking diversity.
Uh...lol... As a woman posting on CD-R...nuh-uh! I have been the odd one out with the unpopular opinion and unusual worldview so many times, I almost feel a need to disclaimer it in many of my posts! I've even gotten into some slightly vociferous tangles with a few of the ladies here. I've been scolded!
I have vast differences of opinion with some, and I'm a little more closely aligned with a very few. But I am not here to represent "women" or "females"...only myself. But I believe that just because I am not the norm, doesn't mean that I am invalidated, that the only valid positions come from those in the majority. I'm one woman out of 3.72 billion, and my life story is just as legit as any of 'em.
Also, this thing you are saying, is a bit contradictory. You say you're looking for diversity in feminine opinion, yet you're talking about patterns you've seen here and elsewhere. Sounds to me like you're looking for patterns, and overlooking diversity.
I wouldn't take it personal I agree you're a little different sometimes and break out of the mold. I don't think it's so much personal opinions where I see what I'm talking about. More like when it comes to when one guy says something that isn't liked by one woman. It seems like the rest pile on and automatically agree with each other in some sort of raging us vs. them battle.
I guess maybe I'd like to see more devil's advocates on the female side so to speak. I always try and look at both sides of views and play the devil's advocate. I think we'll all agree for whatever reason there seems to be a lot of threads on here that deteriorate and devolve extremely quickly.
I wouldn't take it personal I agree you're a little different sometimes. I don't think it's so much personal opinions where I see what I'm talking about...more like when it comes to when a guy says something that isn't liked by one woman. It seems like the rest pile on and automatically agree with each other. I guess maybe I'd like to see more devil's advocates on the female side so to speak. I always try and look at both sides of views and play the devil's advocate.
I don't have any interest in "playing devil's advocate" for its own sake, nor being argumentative merely for the fun of it (it really isn't fun for me.)
But I do try to give people the benefit of the doubt and attempt to contemplate something from multiple angles before I judge a situation.
And I know I'm a little different, I would guess a significant amount of the time, and I'm ok with that. I do not take it personally. At the same time, I'm not here to deliberately upset anybody, so I try to be at least a bit sensitive in some of the things I say...without tipping the scales so far that I'm pretending to be someone I'm not, just to make sure certain posters are comfortable with me. I know that you can't please everyone.
But when a guy says something that stereotypes all women, or dehumanizes us, or is generally a thinly veiled (if that) insult or attack aimed in our general direction, why yes you're going to get a lot of women pushing back. You can hardly expect otherwise.
meeting people organically at quality functions or through friends and family
Like you go to a thing with friends and they know some people and then you suddenly meet.
Or you love snowboarding and you go to some X games thing and you meet someone there.
I'm not talking about fix-ups.
For me at least up to now, that has never worked for me.
Online dating, while it hasn't led me into anything long-term thing as of now, I've at least gotten dates off it with normal women.
I wouldn't take it personal I agree you're a little different sometimes and break out of the mold. I don't think it's so much personal opinions where I see what I'm talking about. More like when it comes to when one guy says something that isn't liked by one woman. It seems like the rest pile on and automatically agree with each other in some sort of raging us vs. them battle.
I guess maybe I'd like to see more devil's advocates on the female side so to speak. I always try and look at both sides of views and play the devil's advocate. I think we'll all agree for whatever reason there seems to be a lot of threads on here that deteriorate and devolve extremely quickly.
Why would anyone want to play devil's advocate just for the sake of it, if they don't believe in that point of view? I feel that my views are often out of step with many of the other women (and men) here. We are not the hive mind that you are making us out to be. When I see a big "consensus" of opinion from women it is usually when someone is making outrageously biased claims.
Why would anyone want to play devil's advocate just for the sake of it, if they don't believe in that point of view? I feel that my views are often out of step with many of the other women (and men) here. We are not the hive mind that you are making us out to be. When I see a big "consensus" of opinion from women it is usually when someone is making outrageously biased claims.
I think shades of grey are pretty common it's possible someone is just posting out of what they've experienced in life I don't really know. I'd have to look at everything on a case by case basis and go from there. It doesn't mean they're automatically wrong. You would have to take into account their age, where they grew up, their race, what their parents relationship was like, lots of things.
It's possible even though there's a general consensus that the person is wrong, that they still aren't. It's just that there's a a disproportionate number of people on here that never experienced what they did.
As someone that follows current events and politics on a daily basis, you never ever go by just what the general consensus is except in the extreme cases where something is clearly black and white.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork
But when a guy says something that stereotypes all women, or dehumanizes us, or is generally a thinly veiled (if that) insult or attack aimed in our general direction, why yes you're going to get a lot of women pushing back. You can hardly expect otherwise.
Yeah I would agree, on these particular instances.
Last edited by wanderlust76; 10-05-2017 at 03:29 PM..
I have never known anyone who met through friends or family to get married. Online dating? Yes. Meeting at shows/bars/events? Yes. Heck, one of the couples I know met when they became roommate.
I wouldn't date friends of friends, personally, and certainly don't want family setting me up.
More true than not. Not universal, but more true than not.
Yeah, I definitely know some isolated cases where people met their partner through friends and family, but I've seen it posted around here so much, and I think it's another phenomenon that exists more on this forum than in real life. I've seen a few ''If you're having trouble getting dates, ask your friends for help and see if they know somebody'' posts, and I don't know many people who search through their friends. My friends are either busy trying to find their own dates, or I just never had any interest in dating the people they know.
Don't get me wrong, I may have been open to my friends introducing me to someone at one time, but I wasn't gonna recruit them in helping me in my search.
I don't have any interest in "playing devil's advocate" for its own sake, nor being argumentative merely for the fun of it (it really isn't fun for me.)
But I do try to give people the benefit of the doubt and attempt to contemplate something from multiple angles before I judge a situation.
And I know I'm a little different, I would guess a significant amount of the time, and I'm ok with that. I do not take it personally. At the same time, I'm not here to deliberately upset anybody, so I try to be at least a bit sensitive in some of the things I say...without tipping the scales so far that I'm pretending to be someone I'm not, just to make sure certain posters are comfortable with me. I know that you can't please everyone.
But when a guy says something that stereotypes all women, or dehumanizes us, or is generally a thinly veiled (if that) insult or attack aimed in our general direction, why yes you're going to get a lot of women pushing back. You can hardly expect otherwise.
That's kind of the point, right? We're not so much a hive mind or agreeing with each other solely on the basis that we share sex chromosomes, we just object to sweeping generalizations and assumptions about an entire demographic of people. I'm sure if someone said "Dudes have no feelings" a lot of men, and women, would object to that, because it isn't universally true. Without a doubt I'm going to challenge baseless assertions and anecdotal evidence used as universal truth. I would think most people who can weigh and assess points and positions critically and objectively would object to generalizations and assumptions.
Yeah, I definitely know some isolated cases where people met their partner through friends and family, but I've seen it posted around here so much, and I think it's another phenomenon that exists more on this forum than in real life. I've seen a few ''If you're having trouble getting dates, ask your friends for help and see if they know somebody'' posts, and I don't know many people who search through their friends. My friends are either busy trying to find their own dates, or I just never had any interest in dating the people they know.
Don't get me wrong, I may have been open to my friends introducing me to someone at one time, but I wasn't gonna recruit them in helping me in my search.
Social networking is one of the best ways to meet people imo sometimes it's really all about who you know in life. I wouldn't necessarily rely on friends, sometimes they can actually hold you back. My one buddy is 11 years older than me, and tries to take the same women I'm after off of me, it's like seriously?? Horrible wingman, no help at all.
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