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I sometimes feel held back by the trauma I experienced with my ex-husband cheating on me and I’m single because should be right now and I have not made it a priority. I am enjoying my life being single and learning more about myself. Feels like such a ray of sunshine nothing having to deal with a lying sob and following my dreams whatever they may be.
Yeah, don't be in such a hurry for a relationship. Better to develop your relationship with yourself.
What is love? Most of the time people think love is all about having someone and jumping into a relationship. In my opinion, love is unconditional giving and forgiving. When you really love someone, it doesn't always mean two of you have to be together, instead, it could be exactly the opposite, and that's to let the other person go.
Do I still believe in love? Truth is, I don't even know any more. I see myself unconditionally giving to people around me and places I visit, but I don't know if that's love. I feel like I didn't come to this world with anything to give, so I trouble my parents in the first place to feed me and raise me, and trouble more to the community for my well being. After decades, I realize I should be the solution to the society and not be the problem. I know the moment I die, other than my family who is going to mourn me, no one will miss me.
So the answer is, is not about giving up on love, but what you can do as a human being, even when you know you will be forgotten after you die.
This is an honest question: are you making this up or embellishing? If not, it utterly shocks and depresses me to know that there are such nasty, vicious people in the world.
With all due respect, it sounds like you have terrible taste in women, and that might be a bigger part of the problem than you realize. I know that modern dating is tough -- believe me --but, asking out better quality women (I'm talking about their characters) might be, at the very least, a less demoralizing experience, even if you don't find "the one" as soon as you'd like.
It was neither made up nor embellished. It happened just as I said. It shouldn't depress yo to know that people like that exist. Yes they were nasty to me, but there are far worse people than them in the world. Follow the news and you'll see what I mean.
And, what does "modern dating" have to do with two isolated incidents that happened twenty years ago?
It was neither made up nor embellished. It happened just as I said. It shouldn't depress yo to know that people like that exist. Yes they were nasty to me, but there are far worse people than them in the world. Follow the news and you'll see what I mean.
And, what does "modern dating" have to do with two isolated incidents that happened twenty years ago?
I don't doubt you're telling the truth, but there seems like there is more to the story. How did you end up asking out such nasty women? Did you not speak to them beforehand to get a sense of what they were like? If so, did they seem like they were interested in you? Usually women are not socialized to be devastatingly rude to a person's face, so you either have a knack for picking some winners, or there were some social cues that you missed.
Aren't they one and the same? Or is there compartmentalizing involved, similar to loving America but hating the government?
So for me.. they are not the same. I'm a firm believer that love in of itself isn't enough to build a life together. To a greater extent, I several "loves" in my life... people who have been in my life for 20+ years; Some platonic, some I have been intimate with, a select few that I've had LTR with. I'd do anything for them... Loosing any of them from my life would break my heart.
Love isn't something that I can define nor author. Relationships are authored by the people that enter into them. I can't control how I feel but I certainly can control what I do with those feelings.
Human's have been asking "What is love?" for centuries... so I surmise it is different from individual to individual.
I've been in a very passionate and loving LTR prior to marriage. For one reason or another we simply couldn't build a life together; For one, she was a single mother of two and I wanted children. She couldn't. We mutually decided to break it off amicably; letting each other find happiness even if it meant with someone else. We did stop communicating for a period of time to recollect/recover but it was only a matter of time before we reconnected. She was there when I did find someone else. She was there when we got married. She was there when we had our three children. She was also there for me when the marriage started to fail. I don't think we stopped loving each other... simply accepted that it wasn't meant to be.
Last edited by usayit; 11-17-2017 at 09:26 AM..
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