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Oh, I thought you posted above that it was a ghost town in the summer, so I responded to that. And yeah, I can't even handle temps in the 90's, let alone over 100!
No problem, it is (mostly) a ghost town in summer, but that's when all wife's friends come to town. Sorry about the confusion.
100 would be a dream for me. A few days ago, it was 122!
Maybe you could approach it the way "snowbirds" do in the northeast. People there apparently get sick of the cold and snow that socks in during the winter. Some of them move to Florida only to realize that they miss having four seasons, so they compromise and move to a more moderate location like my home state of TN pr nearby NC.
If you and your wife want to stay together, you'll either have to suck it up or you both have to compromise on a totally new location.
Yep, the problem is that her company is based in LA. She still has to go into the office 2-3 times a month. It's much easier to be close to LA.
That's what we're trying to determine. Would the OP find a compromise location acceptable? If so, could his wife be persuaded to make one last move?
Yes, this is what we need to know. It sounds like the OP’s wife works remotely but the employer is in LA so she does have to go to LA from time to time. Is it a situation where she goes frequently enough that she needs to be able to drive in (so California or other sweltering desert destinations are basically it) or is a short flight acceptable? As someone else pointed out earlier in the thread, the closer you get to the coast, the more expensive things tend to get, so the OP might be priced out of most of the options that are larger and nearer to job options within driving distance to LA.
Well, in part, this is your own doing, so part of me thinks you should try to make the best of it.
I guess I would make a list of the things that impact me the most, and try to find a way to make them more pleasant, and keep in mind, it has been an abnormally hot season.
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Yes, this is what we need to know. It sounds like the OP’s wife works remotely but the employer is in LA so she does have to go to LA from time to time. Is it a situation where she goes frequently enough that she needs to be able to drive in (so California or other sweltering desert destinations are basically it) or is a short flight acceptable? As someone else pointed out earlier in the thread, the closer you get to the coast, the more expensive things tend to get, so the OP might be priced out of most of the options that are larger and nearer to job options within driving distance to LA.
There are coastal areas that are cheaper than LA, though, and there are mountain areas that are cheaper, too. And there are some locations by that description, that have a similar drive time to LA as Palm Desert. So in theory, the problem is solvable. Also, he needs to be able to drive to LA for work too, if he wants to get back into the local entertainment industry there. Or maybe he could find a similar job in another location.
Well, in part, this is your own doing, so part of me thinks you should try to make the best of it.
I guess I would make a list of the things that impact me the most, and try to find a way to make them more pleasant, and keep in mind, it has been an abnormally hot season.
The problem is, that "abnormally hot" is going to be the new normal, in coming years, probably.
2-3 times a month is no big deal. Are you saying there are NO other towns anywhere near LA that are cooler, if that truly is your primary complaint???
At this point this is a question for the California forum because the relationship issue has been resolved: Live with it, compromise or separate.
This is what I have been struggling to understand. There is nowhere other than LA proper?
I don't know anything about California but is she not driving into LA from the desert when she has to go in? If she has to drive anyway, I guess I'm not understanding why she can't drive in from elsewhere.
Last edited by cleasach; 08-02-2018 at 05:41 PM..
Reason: wrong word
Maybe you can put in a really good effort, an almost over compensating effort to like it over the next two years. Then beg (I mean this literally) for mercy to move. She might be more receptive, if she observes a hard fought effort.
Maybe you can put in a really good effort, an almost over compensating effort to like it over the next two years. Then beg (I mean this literally) for mercy to move. She might be more receptive, if she observes a hard fought effort.
Yes, I was thinking this. Too bad I'm ready to go now, but I see your point.
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