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This guy was misreading the situation and really not clued into your boundaries and his action here are wrong and I am not defending him nor his actions.
The question you seem to have, is why? The issue here is to me more than sex, lots of guys are looking to get lucky on a first date, but they don't act like this guy either.
I think this guy had built up a fantasy relationship with you in his mind. In his mind he had imagined that this first date was going to be this super romantic, highly sexual experience. This guy has been fixated on you for years. Now you are finally on a date with him, and he wants to believe it will be magical. This was of course all in his head. The intense soul stare, this is all the product of a fantasy relationship. He is asking you if you are shy because in his mind, you are as in love with him as he is in love with you. When you are not initially making eye contact with him, he is reading that not as disinterest, but as coyness because he wants to believe you're as into him as he is into you.
But as the date progresses so too is the cognitive dissonance. You are not shy; you are talking about moving away. The date gets increasingly awkward for him too because the fantasy relationship that he created in his mind with you is also collapsing. At some point, he has to realize you and him are not on the same page. When that occurs is when he makes up an excuse as to why he needs to get out. This is also now why he has broken off all conduct. Now he is embarrassed by his actions.
Him staring at you and asking about getting lots of compliments is because in his eyes, you are the magical dream woman/ sex goddess, that all men want, and all women wish they could be. So naturally you are getting complimented all of the time. This is all about his fantasy relationship that he has projected onto you and him and the role he has assigned to you in this fantasy.
Or he thought the "smoldering and intense" was a way to get laid, but it didn't work. You never know with some of these people. Maybe he heard all the women are swooning at ACOTAR, and thought that was the way to play it.
What she should know is to block him and move on.
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It doesn't matter why he did what he did, or what he is thinking, or what his needs are. Stay far away from him. He is not your problem and he is not your project. There is something really wrong with his wiring. Don't go into any dark alleys with him.
How old are you two?
I still think that it was a mistake to meet in the park, whose idea was this? Why did you not go to a coffee shop where there are people around and he could not behave as he did there and you would have had more conversation. First meetings should always be in public and avoid sitting in cars !! Did he contact you since the first date? How do you feel about him now? How old are you both?
Overwhelming opinion is that he didn’t want you. Problem solved.
He likely built a fantasy in his head, realized it wasn’t going to be that and moved rapidly along.
The baffling part is why you would care? You obviously didn’t want any part of this, so isn’t him bouncing a good thing?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rent.in.ny
How old are you two?
I still think that it was a mistake to meet in the park, whose idea was this? Why did you not go to a coffee shop where there are people around and he could not behave as he did there and you would have had more conversation. First meetings should always be in public and avoid sitting in cars !! Did he contact you since the first date? How do you feel about him now? How old are you both?
Well it wasn’t really a park. There were loads of people around, it’s was like a Christmas light show. Where everyone walks around as looks at the lights . We’re both college age so we’re young. Nope he left the date early and I never heard from he again.
Overwhelming opinion is that he didn’t want you. Problem solved.
He likely built a fantasy in his head, realized it wasn’t going to be that and moved rapidly along.
The baffling part is why you would care? You obviously didn’t want any part of this, so isn’t him bouncing a good thing?
This is definitely not true, where do you read this?
He liked her too much.
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