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Lodestar, that’s so funny that she hung up on you). Even as a younger social worker I knew that adults were not children and had a right to determine their own destiny in their senior years. Maybe it’s because I spent a lot of time with my wonderful, capable grandparents.
The cognitive tests they do can help to spot cognitive decline in the early stages and there are medicines that could potentially be prescribed to slow down the progress.
I think that's a good reason for getting a baseline done. Then if a change is noted a retest could be done and any meds needed could be prescribed.
The cognitive tests they do can help to spot cognitive decline in the early stages and there are medicines that could potentially be prescribed to slow down the progress.
I think that's a good reason for getting a baseline done. Then if a change is noted a retest could be done and any meds needed could be prescribed.
Is there a down side to that?
If you live alone there is because then it’s documented that you have cognitive decline and professionals start telling you when you can no longer live alone, etc. inserting themselves into your life. Also you don’t start medication in the early stages as they have many side effects.
Smart people have always had wills, end of life directives, etc so when something happens it can be dealt with. If you are part of a couple then you don’t have the same concerns of course. I have my kids appointed as guardians if I should need it.
If you live alone there is because then it’s documented that you have cognitive decline and professionals start telling you when you can no longer live alone, etc. inserting themselves into your life. Also you don’t start medication in the early stages as they have many side effects.
Smart people have always had wills, end of life directives, etc so when something happens it can be dealt with. If you are part of a couple then you don’t have the same concerns of course. I have my kids appointed as guardians if I should need it.
Interesting. I have heard that it is beneficial to start some of the medication in the early stages. And, yes, while it is definitely nice to have a spouse by your side, you need to keep in mind that your spouse could predecease you leaving you with these documented results anyway - then what?
If testing for dementia and treating it early on could slow down the progression I would do it. The doctor isn't going to put you in a nursing home or even take your driver's license away for some mild cognitive changes - whether you have a spouse or not.
I'm not sure of the side effects involved, though. I'd need to look into that.
You clicked on a thread with title - Who will take care of you if you don’t have kid? If that’s you - it is a concern and stick around. Otherwise, you are just telling those who don’t have kids how to think about it. Not necessary. Those who have kids but do not want to bother them are in a different category and don’t appreciate the issues those without kids have.
The people who do have young children get sandwiched between their parent(s) and their young children that is if they do help them. Thing is when it comes to people like me who never had children and no spouse we are up ****z creek if we don't plan for help or pay for it now before it's to late. OP asked a good question.
The people who do have young children get sandwiched between their parent(s) and their young children that is if they do help them. Thing is when it comes to people like me who never had children and no spouse we are up ****z creek if we don't plan for help or pay for it now before it's to late. OP asked a good question.
I agree that the question is good - and serious. As someone without children, I’d like to see substantive discussion as well. I, however, stand by my comment.
I agree that the question is good - and serious. As someone without children, I’d like to see substantive discussion as well. I, however, stand by my comment.
As you should but I understand why people with children came in too. It's really a question about people without children. Its even harder without anyone except strangers.
Does your mom have a rollator? If not, time to get her one. You can order one off of Walmart for her. There - you've helped your mom. Now it's up to her.
You are being weighed down by your parents' issues. If you were my son I would want you to take that energy and direct it towards making your life better. Go to the gym, cook a healthy meal, do something that makes you smile.
She doesn't want one - wouldn't use it if I got it for her. She's fine in the house, but can't walk very far. My aunt and grandmother saw her yesterday pushing a cart out of the grocery store, and commented to me about how frail she looks and how badly she walks when I came by a couple of hours later.
Quote:
Originally Posted by springfieldva
The cognitive tests they do can help to spot cognitive decline in the early stages and there are medicines that could potentially be prescribed to slow down the progress.
I think that's a good reason for getting a baseline done. Then if a change is noted a retest could be done and any meds needed could be prescribed.
Is there a down side to that?
If the kids had been more attentive with my paternal grandmother, she might not have suffered as badly. She was talking about dead people more than five years prior to her death from "dementia." She would talk about visiting dead relatives who had been dead for decades, then snap back into reality seamlessly. This was 2017-2019. Her brain was basically dying for years without any monitoring or treatment.
She doesn't want one - wouldn't use it if I got it for her. She's fine in the house, but can't walk very far. My aunt and grandmother saw her yesterday pushing a cart out of the grocery store, and commented to me about how frail she looks and how badly she walks when I came by a couple of hours later.
If the kids had been more attentive with my paternal grandmother, she might not have suffered as badly. She was talking about dead people more than five years prior to her death from "dementia." She would talk about visiting dead relatives who had been dead for decades, then snap back into reality seamlessly. This was 2017-2019. Her brain was basically dying for years without any monitoring or treatment.
Then get a rollator for your father to have "on hand". The last thing he needs is to hurt himself trying to assist your mom to the car should her mobility suddenly worsen. Your mom is young to be so old. I really do feel for both you and your dad. I know you are frustrated and I can't blame you one bit.
As far as your paternal grandmother goes, it depends on what the cause of her dementia was. To my knowledge the medication available now only treats certain types of dementia. Vascular dementia, for instance, is one that is not treatable by those meds.
Then get a rollator for your father to have "on hand". The last thing he needs is to hurt himself trying to assist your mom to the car should her mobility suddenly worsen. Your mom is young to be so old. I really do feel for both you and your dad. I know you are frustrated and I can't blame you one bit.
As far as your paternal grandmother goes, it depends on what the cause of her dementia was. To my knowledge the medication available now only treats certain types of dementia. Vascular dementia, for instance, is one that is not treatable by those meds.
They'd be insulted by the mention of that.
My aunt is 62. She always talks about how she's "slowed down," struggles, etc. Their mother was healthier at 75 than either my mom or aunt are in their early-mid 60s. I don't see either one of them living to 80.
My dad, on the other hand, doesn't seem 66 at all. Before this year's drama, he'd go to the bars with me. More women would flirt with him than me.
Your location is a bit "vague" but it looks like "Home Instead" may or may not have an office to serve you.
Home Instead is a franchised business. The business owners pay a low wage to non-professional caregivers who provide basic, non-medical in-home services for old people living in their own place, stuff like taking them to Dr. appointments, grocery shopping, make a simple meal, some personal hygiene assistance, babysitting someone with dementia, usually as respite for their primary caregiver (aka spouse etc.). There are many of these for-profit, at-home care companies around. They provide a service for people with good financial resources, as they are expensive.
Realistically, no one can really depend on anyone other than themselves. There is no guarantee that a spouse or SO, child, grandchild, sibling, other relative, friend, neighbor, business or facility, can or will be around, no matter what promises are made or contracts signed. Like every other life stage, plans are made but often just don’t work out.
Sometimes I feel that posts like this have a hidden agenda, there is a lot of fearmongering.
Last edited by CalWorth; 12-19-2023 at 10:18 PM..
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). Even as a younger social worker I knew that adults were not children and had a right to determine their own destiny in their senior years. Maybe it’s because I spent a lot of time with my wonderful, capable grandparents.
