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Old 03-05-2015, 08:56 AM
 
Location: Central Maine
2,867 posts, read 2,990,380 times
Reputation: 3983

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Okay. Sooo.......?
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Old 03-05-2015, 08:58 AM
 
Location: Corona del Mar & Coronado, CA
1,781 posts, read 1,248,044 times
Reputation: 2344
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zelpha View Post
I'm fairly confident that this will be a healthy parent/child arrangement but it seems a line between selecting a child in need of a home and selecting an attractive young man was blurred a bit.
Who is blurring the line?
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Old 03-05-2015, 09:01 AM
 
15,254 posts, read 16,847,749 times
Reputation: 25437
Quote:
Originally Posted by longneckone View Post
I wonder if they had any idea what raising a teen would be like?
Assuming they did not, how is that different from any parent, anywhere?
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Old 03-05-2015, 09:05 AM
 
Location: Corona del Mar & Coronado, CA
1,781 posts, read 1,248,044 times
Reputation: 2344
Quote:
Originally Posted by tlarnla View Post
If a heterosexual couple wanted to adopt a beautiful teenage girl, people would wonder about that too. Most people seeking to adopt are looking for babies or young children.

This couple probably knew the boy they chose to adopt beforehand.

If they, or anybody else, went to an orphanage and said, "We want to adopt a teenager," I think the orphanage would wonder why.
I think you do not understand at all the incredible need for adoptive and foster parents for older children.

If I ran an orphanage and someone came and said, "I (we) want to adopt a teenager," I'd think, "God bless these people, they have a heart for teens who usually feel like refuse in the system."
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Old 03-05-2015, 09:21 AM
 
20,633 posts, read 16,673,422 times
Reputation: 38787
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanguardisle View Post
I didnt say I thought they were incapable I just wanted to discuss the reason for the post. People on here need to get real with this op. She or he is not saying anyting or thinking anything that a lot of other people would not be saying or thinking ( and not so nicely) they just would not post it so do not be rude to this person who shares that they feel uncomfortable and wants to talk about it. Insulting someone will not make the feeling go away but maybe an honest discussion will. I will give this gay couple the benefit of the doubt but since many in my family growing up were adopted ( including my own mother as a baby) I have normally thought of adoption as something for babies or very young children not teens and of course it is only in the last decade or so that gay rights gained prominence to the general public so it is all new and strange .

I guess what is also strange to me is to adopt a teen who is almost a grown man? How much time will they have with him before he leaves the house and goes out on his own? Yes it is strange to me ... I do not think the gay couple is incapable of doing something wrong and neither is a straight couple, I just hope for the best and the boy is old enough to protect himself and stand up for himself if there is something wrong going on. I do in general like the idea of gay couples adopting unwanted children.
It is not uncommon for people to adopt teens. On our local news they have "Wednesday's Child", where they profile a child who needs a family and has been in the system their entire lives. Most of these kids are older, and still have heartbreaking dreams of a family, and when they update, most of them get homes. Often they are troubled kids. I do not think if this was a hetero couple who adopted a pretty teen girl, that people would be assuming untoward intentions. Gays are no more likely to be pedophiles than heteros.

I can't even imagine the feelings of rejection a child develops by the time they're teens when they spend their lives watching friends get adopted, meeting potential parents, and never getting "chosen". I think these guys should be commended for giving such a child a home.
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Old 03-05-2015, 09:50 AM
 
Location: Long Neck , DE
4,903 posts, read 3,039,909 times
Reputation: 8025
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow View Post
Assuming they did not, how is that different from any parent, anywhere?
Forget the gay/straight aspect. As a parent/step parent I am just saying I wonder if they had any idea what they were getting into. Teen years are not all a bed of roses even with great kids.
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Old 03-05-2015, 10:24 AM
 
15,254 posts, read 16,847,749 times
Reputation: 25437
Quote:
Originally Posted by longneckone View Post
Forget the gay/straight aspect. As a parent/step parent I am just saying I wonder if they had any idea what they were getting into. Teen years are not all a bed of roses even with great kids.
I agree with you. I'm just saying that until you have a teen, or a baby for that matter, you don't really realize what's involved. But that doesn't mean that you can't get it done when faced with the challenges.
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Old 03-05-2015, 10:28 AM
 
Location: New Market, MD
2,098 posts, read 2,623,759 times
Reputation: 2623
yup let's make sure no "attractive" girl or boy say above 12 or 13 gets adopted in future
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Old 03-05-2015, 10:34 AM
 
4,447 posts, read 2,623,195 times
Reputation: 10380
Quote:
Originally Posted by alpha_1976 View Post
yup let's make sure no "attractive" girl or boy say above 12 or 13 gets adopted in future
Yep, oh, for sure, and gee, I wonder who gets to decide IF they are "attractive" or not???
Obviously the O.P!
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Old 03-05-2015, 11:14 AM
 
Location: Long Neck , DE
4,903 posts, read 3,039,909 times
Reputation: 8025
Quote:
Originally Posted by alpha_1976 View Post
yup let's make sure no "attractive" girl or boy say above 12 or 13 gets adopted in future
Definitely safer that way. Of course there could never be a problem with foster parents or group home workers.
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