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My daughter is in high school where there is a strict dress code...no spaghetti straps, tank tops, camis, etc. unless covered by a shrug. Skirts/dresses/shorts with hemlines below the tip of your middle finger when your arms are extended on your side...no exceptions even when wearing tights or leggings. No low slung jeans. No jackets, hats nor sunglasses in classrooms (all stay in the lockers). No tops that show belly skin. No baggy pants for boys. No T-shirts with alcohol/drugs/guns logo or anything with sexual or political overtones. Penalties include being sent home with an unexcused absence and a warning.
My daughter is only allowed to wear short shorts inside the house and at the beach. She's not allowed to walk around the neighborhood (even to the swimming pool) in short shorts. Once she cut an old pair of jeans to wear as shorts and it came out too short. My husband asked her to take them off, and he tossed them into the big trash bin. Needless to say, she didn't waste any more jeans cut that short.
Wow, a school that doesn't mess around, I like that.
And parents who put their foot down. I like that even more.
Wow, a school that doesn't mess around, I like that.
And parents who put their foot down. I like that even more.
It's about time.
I've never seen a more tightly-run school district such as where we are now...from elementary to high school. Zero tolerance on many things...dress code, bullying and drugs. There is a separate "Academy" in the district, sort of like a reform school, for middle schoolers who have had serious infractions and are booted out of the public schools. You can return after a year of good behavior, but one more strike and you're kicked out of the district. Does not exist in high school though...once kicked out, you're out. Plus, my understanding is that the school officials in the county have a special passcode to be able to monitor student's MySpace and Facebook accounts if they had to go in there.
In re: to the incident above, it might well have been something besides the short shorts that made this guy follow you. Men don't rape women b/c of what they're wearing.
If the guy had to chose me with the really short shorts or someone else with long jeans, which do you think he would go for?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana
Old men gawk at young women no matter what they are wearing. I'm all for dressing appropriately, and have posted so, but girls do not get raped because they wear provacative clothing.
A rapist will rape, he will select a target. Opportunity and clothes are high up there on the selection criteria.
This is not to say that any woman deserves to be raped. The rapist is still at fault. Just like we don't venture into certain neighborhoods at night in case we are robbed. We should use common sense when dressing our daughters and ourselves. JMO
There's a lot to be said for self respect and good sense.
Provocative: Serving to provoke or excite.
Provoke: To stir up on purpose; to call forth, evoke.
(According to Webster)
I'd say wearing provocative clothing indeed is looking to arouse and excite men. I have seen men follow young girls and young women dressed provocatively.
My apologies. Rape itself is not one of the results. I stand corrected. However, I do stand by the remainder of my point.
Well, perhaps "provocative" was a poor word choice. Maybe "skimpy" would have been better.
suzie02:
Quote:
A rapist will rape, he will select a target. Opportunity and clothes are high up there on the selection criteria.
From the CDC. See risk factors. Clothing is not on the list. My daughter went to a sexual assault lecture at her college and the presenter said that in her experience, 100% of campus rapes involved alcohol use by one or both parties.
I truly have a hard time believing that someone under the influence of alcohol would find no difference between attacking someone in flannel pajamas/granny underwear and another in a Victoria's Secret crotchless teddie!
100% of campus rapes involved alcohol use by one or both parties.
I wasn't narrowing it to college campus rapes only. We started talking about high school girls anyway. It is all JMO.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bibit612
I truly have a hard time believing that someone under the influence of alcohol would find no difference between attacking someone in flannel pajamas/granny underwear and another in a Victoria's Secret crotchless teddie!
From the CDC. See risk factors. Clothing is not on the list. My daughter went to a sexual assault lecture at her college and the presenter said that in her experience, 100% of campus rapes involved alcohol use by one or both parties.
I would have really big doubts of this 'presenter's' qualifications. Stating that 100% of campus rapes involve alcohol use... is so far away from the truth it's ridiculous. How can she possibly make a statement like that then expect to be taken seriously. She would have to be familiar with every campus rape on every campus for years and years, and know that both parties were KNOWN to have been drinking. And I know for a fact that statement is not true.
First, there is no way on earth that she could possibly know that. Many times, the perpetrator is not known, so how would anyone know alcohol was a factor, and when they are, would they ALL say yes, they were drinking and were possibly drunk enough to rape someone. I don't think so.
Second, many campus rapes involve drugs, not alcohol. Even some involve outside perpetrators and no alcohol or drugs at all.
That may be her OPINION, but it's a long way from a statistic.
Yes. See below, from your own definition. Skimpy does not imply intent.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stormy night
There's a lot to be said for self respect and good sense.
What a great idea. More schools should take that lead.
Provocative: Serving to provoke or excite.
Provoke: To stir up on purpose; to call forth, evoke.
(According to Webster)
I'd say wearing provocative clothing indeed is looking to arouse and excite men. I have seen men follow young girls and young women dressed provocatively.
My apologies. Rape itself is not one of the results. I stand corrected. However, I do stand by the remainder of my point.
Quote:
Originally Posted by suzie02
I wasn't narrowing it to college campus rapes only. We started talking about high school girls anyway. It is all JMO.
It was an example.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stormy night
I would have really big doubts of this 'presenter's' qualifications. Stating that 100% of campus rapes involve alcohol use... is so far away from the truth it's ridiculous. How can she possibly make a statement like that then expect to be taken seriously. She would have to be familiar with every campus rape on every campus for years and years, and know that both parties were KNOWN to have been drinking. And I know for a fact that statement is not true.
First, there is no way on earth that she could possibly know that. Many times, the perpetrator is not known, so how would anyone know alcohol was a factor, and when they are, would they ALL say yes, they were drinking and were possibly drunk enough to rape someone. I don't think so.
Second, many campus rapes involve drugs, not alcohol. Even some involve outside perpetrators and no alcohol or drugs at all.
That may be her OPINION, but it's a long way from a statistic.
First of all, this person was the director of the rape crisis center at that university; she certainly knows more about what's going on there than someone who has never set foot on that campus. And she didn't say 100% of all campus rapes, she said in her experience, in her job. So yes, there is every way on earth she could know what is going on on her campus. And yes, I do think so.
Calling it skimpy instead of provocative is just trying to make it OK. You know, there was a time when people had morals and didn't show everything to everyone. I was watching "Christy." It was funny because it was considered akin to pornography for a woman in a picture to not be wearing shoes or stockings. Also, dressing that way is starting younger and younger these days. It is absolutely crazy. Parents need to be parents and realize that they can't let their kids wear whatever they want.
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