Celibacy or not before marriage?? (employment, drugs, statistics, education)
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What is with this talk about teenage parenthood? Is it possible to have intercourse as a teen without getting knocked up. Trust me, I know.
Stupid teenagers make stupid decisions which result in having a kid. And yes, there are smart teenagers.
There is nothing you can do about your daugther having sex or not. Just like everything else in the world, too little or too much of one thing can become a bad thing. If shes still a virgin into her 30's...watch out for trouble!
I wanted to get off the immigration and such for awhile.
So here it goes, my daughter is 19-20 in December-and is still a virgin. Now the debate is did I pound into her too much that it is the one thing that boys want after a date or its because it is the only thing you can truely give your husband that noone else has. I don't know if I have done right by her, she has yet to keep a boyfriend over 6 months. I know she is young, but I was married by her age.
Opinions do matter here.
I think the idea of waiting until marriage is.. flawed. Sex is a big and natural part of any relationship, and the only way to learn is really by doing. Look back at your life and think about what you learned the most from, listening to your folks, or messing up a few times?
I'm not advocating having sex with anything that moves, and for gods sake, be smart about it, but allow teens as well as young adults experience relationships etc for themselves, the way we all do.
When I have kids, I'll tell them to never have sex for the wrong reasons, and always always always use a condom.
That said, if it's consenting (for the right reasons, even if that's mutual teenage lust) mutually respectful sex, it's healthy, for late teens too (16+ is the AOC here), and I don't see any reason to advocate against it.
I can think of a million things she "gives" me that no one else could give in the same way. She makes me truly happy and I'm nothing without her. She makes me a better person, and that alone is a unique gift.
Don't ever think all you have to offer is your body, girls, you're far more important than that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by trnsplntfrmNV
I agree sex is a major part of a marriage, you spend more time in bed with them then any other way. But why make sex more important than say communication?
I think sex is a form of communication, I also think it's an enabler of communication.
I ran background checks on the guys I seriously thought of. Can't be too careful nowadays. My husband thought it was the coolest thing!
I think I'd leave someone if they ran a background check on me, I have nothing to hide, but if they can't trust me on that I can't see any grounds to build a relationship on. Trust is key, for me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Omaha Rocks
I wonder how differently America would look, and work, if people actually did wait until marriage for sex.
- There would be far less poverty.
- There would almost certainly be far less crime.
- There would be far more productivity in the workplace.
- Our taxes would be considerably lower.
I could live with that.
Uh, now, I will say, I've read your reply to someone else, but still, how on earth did you get to that conclusion???
I know that I for one is more productive when I have a good sex life, I'm also in a better mood, more positive and as a result think of solutions quicker.
I think it's interesting that a country like Norway, where waiting until marriage is abnormal and a rare exception, there's less poverty, less crime and more productivity.
Taxes are higher, but the higher paychecks and benefits provided more than makes up for that.
And before someone comes and say "they're only 5,000,000 people ladibladida...", you only need 1000+ for a study to be a fairly accurate representation of reality. 5 million is more than enough subjects to prove or indicate a trend.
Uh, now, I will say, I've read your reply to someone else, but still, how on earth did you get to that conclusion???
I know that I for one is more productive when I have a good sex life, I'm also in a better mood, more positive and as a result think of solutions quicker.
I think it's interesting that a country like Norway, where waiting until marriage is abnormal and a rare exception, there's less poverty, less crime and more productivity.
Taxes are higher, but the higher paychecks and benefits provided more than makes up for that.
And before someone comes and say "they're only 5,000,000 people ladibladida...", you only need 1000+ for a study to be a fairly accurate representation of reality. 5 million is more than enough subjects to prove or indicate a trend.
Well... Comparing one country to another is ALWAYS flawed. Always has been, and always will be. Trying to compare a country of 3-5 million people with a country of 350 million people is absurd. We might as well be comparing Japan to China.
That said...
Teenage pregnancy and (almost always) single teenage motherhood is one of the single most destructive elements a society can have. These girls will almost certainly live in poverty, as will their babies. And there is no way to ignore the correlation between poverty & crime and/or the correlation between absentee fathers and troubles with kids.
I'm not deluded into thinking that teenagers will suddenly stop making stupid choices - one of which is to have sex and get pregnant. What I am saying is that if the problem of teenage pregnancy was completely eliminated, we'd have a MUCH healthier society.
Well... Comparing one country to another is ALWAYS flawed. Always has been, and always will be. Trying to compare a country of 3-5 million people with a country of 350 million people is absurd. We might as well be comparing Japan to China.
That said...
Teenage pregnancy and (almost always) single teenage motherhood is one of the single most destructive elements a society can have. These girls will almost certainly live in poverty, as will their babies. And there is no way to ignore the correlation between poverty & crime and/or the correlation between absentee fathers and troubles with kids.
I'm not deluded into thinking that teenagers will suddenly stop making stupid choices - one of which is to have sex and get pregnant. What I am saying is that if the problem of teenage pregnancy was completely eliminated, we'd have a MUCH healthier society.
Without getting into side debates about countries, lol, Yes, I agree that teen pregnancies is a problem, I don't think abstinence is the answer though. You said yourself that you don't think it'll happen. That said, you can educate teens about the safe ways of having sex, and you can provide free birth control (shown to have cut abortion numbers in half, I'm pretty sure teen pregnancies have too).
I still don't get the correlation with absenting and more efficiency in a wrok environment though, and I'm guessing the lower taxes is based on the less crime argument?
Without getting into side debates about countries, lol, Yes, I agree that teen pregnancies is a problem, I don't think abstinence is the answer though. You said yourself that you don't think it'll happen. That said, you can educate teens about the safe ways of having sex, and you can provide free birth control (shown to have cut abortion numbers in half, I'm pretty sure teen pregnancies have too).
I still don't get the correlation with absenting and more efficiency in a wrok environment though, and I'm guessing the lower taxes is based on the less crime argument?
This whole thread has been about waiting until marriage to have sex. There are reasons why that really would be the best thing to do. Teenagers not having sex, and obviously not getting pregnant, would be a good thing.
That said, in the obvious absence of abstinence, it would appear that the next best thing is to help teenagers keep from getting pregnant.
I wanted to get off the immigration and such for awhile.
So here it goes, my daughter is 19-20 in December-and is still a virgin. Now the debate is did I pound into her too much that it is the one thing that boys want after a date or its because it is the only thing you can truely give your husband that noone else has. I don't know if I have done right by her, she has yet to keep a boyfriend over 6 months. I know she is young, but I was married by her age.
Opinions do matter here.
Here is the current culture scoop with guys and dating : They have been constantly groomed to be sexual users of women by our highly sexualized society --- a total disregard for the other persons dignity and respect as a human being. Of course women have also bought into the mantra of using men too . The fact that she cant keep a buy for more than 6 months is due to her not being willing to put out after the guy has dropped some money in entertaining her . Essentially, she isnt trampy enough and has too much dignity where sexual male predators are concerned. You should be VERY proud of her and reinforce her virginity and do all you can to protect her from guys who just want her for a temporary copulation. In time, she will find a decent guy who has the same moral integrity and desires to wait till his marriage night too. Because we live in an out of control sex saturated society that promotes sexual immorality even during the early evening hours of 'family' tv ... you should as her Parent should NOT cave into the cultures pressure where your precious daughter is concerned.
I think I'd leave someone if they ran a background check on me, I have nothing to hide, but if they can't trust me on that I can't see any grounds to build a relationship on. Trust is key, for me.
Trust is key, absolutely!
We now live in a society where women such as myself feel the need to take these measures because of the various dangers we face. I would say half of men got very agitated about background checks and the other half were perfectly fine with it. I also offered my background check to be fair.
Why consunsual sex is considered immoral? What two or more people do with or to each other that does not result in hospital bills is only relevant to the people involved. Why such a fuss?
Originally Posted by TheViking85 I think I'd leave someone if they ran a background check on me, I have nothing to hide, but if they can't trust me on that I can't see any grounds to build a relationship on. Trust is key, for me.'
REPLY: With 1 in 4 women being sexually assaulted sometime during their life (not including physical abuse / severe emotional abuse)...I commend any woman for doing a thorough background check on a man . It is getting increasingly dangerous to be a female in an out of control sex saturated society where boys/young men are being daily groomed to exploit women .
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