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Black is not just a color. It's a culture. When people adopt a child of a different race, they owe it to that child to expose him/her to his culture, whether it's taking classes in that culture's history, joining groups comprised of other kids of that culture or whatever. The OP's parents probably meant well but they did him no service by ignoring his culture.
I used to work with a guy from Uganda who did not WANT to fit in with what he felt was the typical American black. In fact if he weren't black himself, you might have thought he was a racist from the things he would say about American blacks and the so-called black culture.
Again there is no one way that someone of a particular race or ethnicity must act.
True -- and Bill Cosby is one of the first to criticize the current black "street culture". But that's not the same thing as "black culture" at all.
Blacks have a culture and a history that should be studied and appreciated in much more depth than current white school curricula provides. That culture/history is a bond that no whites can share or even understand. To dismiss it is ignorant to the point of prejudice.
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Everyone doesn't like assimilating into "white culture" and everyone shouldn't have to. You are proud to be "whitewashed" (as you state above) so you instantly jumped on the defense. If you read the above post the OP also said that he received racism from Black people as well so how does that equate to him trying to attack white people? He was receiving it from both ends which is why he shut down because he doesn't know where he belongs.
Maybe you are having an identity crisis. You want to separate yourself from the stereotypes of being a Black male so much that you have separated yourself from your own family and is demonizing this young man for not fully assimilating and questioning who he is.
My advice to you: Seek help for your own insecurities before advising someone else on the same issue. It's nothing wrong with liking what you like are being who you are but don't act as if you are superior because of it.
Assimilating into his parents' people is a possibility.
Not so much in the usa but definitely a possibility in England so just pointing it out.
It's not much in fashion but it'd deserve to be.
He has been on the receiving end of prejudice from fellow black people but it's his ex gf and parents that he's pushing away, tossing aside his life experience with those people though he himself describes that life experience as largely positive.
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeSaySheSay
You have your own thoughts about Black people and Black culture as you have stated in your past post. You stated that you only talk to YOUR mom 2x a month and that you communicate with your sister by e-mail as they like black culture.
Those issues are completely and utterly separate from the black thing.
I'm just not very chatty on the phone at all and I don't like facebook very much and I'd rather learn
about what's happening in people's lives by asking them, when we meet. My mom and siblings live a continent away so it's normal that we don't comunicate that often.
We do visit each other when we can and they're all welcome in my house *anytime* they want.
Black is not just a color. It's a culture. When people adopt a child of a different race, they owe it to that child to expose him/her to his culture, whether it's taking classes in that culture's history, joining groups comprised of other kids of that culture or whatever. The OP's parents probably meant well but they did him no service by ignoring his culture.
In the past, when one adopted a child, one brought that child into one's world.
Whites who were raised by Indians were raised to be Indians.
Indians who were raised by Whites were raised to be Whites.
People were smart enough back then to not pay attention to diversity and to value social cohesion above diversity. I think they knew something back then.
Why would you raise a child to be of a different culture than your own, unless your own culture was really and truly inadequate for your child's needs?
There's no way I can respond to such an ignorant statement without getting banned.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hvl
In the past, when one adopted a child, one brought that child into one's world.
Whites who were raised by Indians were raised to be Indians.
Indians who were raised by Whites were raised to be Whites.
People were smart enough back then to not pay attention to diversity and to value social cohesion above diversity. I think they knew something back then.
Why would you raise a child to be of a different culture than your own, unless your own culture was really and truly inadequate for your child's needs?
There's no way I can respond to such an ignorant statement without getting banned.
Maybe you can point out what I'm "ignorant" of ?
I'll remind you that "ignorant" means "lacking in knowledge", not "holding an opinion different from yours".
Some folks here aren't used to hearing from those who don't adhere to the orthodoxy.
In the past, when one adopted a child, one brought that child into one's world.
Whites who were raised by Indians were raised to be Indians.
Indians who were raised by Whites were raised to be Whites.
People were smart enough back then to not pay attention to diversity and to value social cohesion above diversity. I think they knew something back then.
Why would you raise a child to be of a different culture than your own, unless your own culture was really and truly inadequate for your child's needs?
You must not live in the real world. In the real world you dont always have a sign on your forehead that says what race your parents are. If people see Leukensia, Jillian Michaels black daughter, no one gives a rat''ass that her parents are white. She walks into this world looking like a black woman & will be treated as such. Same with OP.
I have gotten the you don't " acting black" thing my whole life. I have been the only black person in the book store, at parties, and I was the only black person in many of my classes in grade school.You need to be comfortable with who you are as a person. I think you need to embrace your parents because they obviously love you. Do not allow the world to dictate who you are ? My mother use to tell me, you speak correct grammar and the black kids that can only speak street slang or improper diction with have trouble getting and maintaining a job. Why would you mistreat your parent that gave you what most parent dream of giving their kids a good home, good education and nice neighborhood to grow and develop in. Would you have rather grow up in the hood so you can have a hood experience to identify with what people deem as acting black.
In the past, when one adopted a child, one brought that child into one's world.
Whites who were raised by Indians were raised to be Indians.
Indians who were raised by Whites were raised to be Whites.
People were smart enough back then to not pay attention to diversity and to value social cohesion above diversity. I think they knew something back then.
Why would you raise a child to be of a different culture than your own, unless your own culture was really and truly inadequate for your child's needs?
Actually, this is probably completely true.
Not sure what the uproar over it is.
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