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That doesn't go over too well when one party is pouting profusely and giving one word answers that go nowhere. This is how it would go down, I bet every dollar I earn between now and 2050.
Me: How are we going to spend the rest of our lives?
Her: I don't know
Me: What are our priorities?
Her: I don't know
^ I guarantee that that would be the totality of our conversation
You forgot the last part in that conversation:
Followed by Irish: "I'm sorry for asking....here...let me go buy you something...or even better, here's my credit card...go buy yourself something nice. I'm sorry. And once more for good measure...I'm so sorry for upsetting you. After all, you DID have to endure pregnancy, childbirth as well as child rearing. That's an awful lot to have dealt with. I'm sorry again.
<slinks off to play video games and log onto CD to complain about his wife>
Not saying I'm going to do it, but, I know her, and there's only 1 thing that will get her to talk to me. Starts with a J, ends with -ewelry
You should get her a gift more appropriate for her behavior: starts with a j, ends with -uicebox.
For real, though, this is how the conversation SHOULD go ....
You: You can "not talk" to me all you want, but you need to know that I am not going to respond the way I used to. I have not done anything wrong, so your "punishment" of the cold shoulder won't work.
If you don't understand that, then we need to go to more sessions with the marriage counselor. I'll be in the [insert whatever activity here as you go on with your day] if you need me.
That doesn't go over too well when one party is pouting profusely and giving one word answers that go nowhere. This is how it would go down, I bet every dollar I earn between now and 2050.
Me: How are we going to spend the rest of our lives?
Her: I don't know
Me: What are our priorities?
Her: I don't know
^ I guarantee that that would be the totality of our conversation
Why do you take everything so literally? What do you talk about when you go out to dinner? Next time you are both in a decent mood and go out for a face-to-face meal, talk about the future. You are both stuck on talking about the past. Memories are nice, but the past is over. Talk about your future.
"Now that our son is an adult and almost out of the house, is there anything new you'd like to try?" "anyplace else you'd want to live?" "Any trips you'd like to take?" If she brings up the condo again, tell her you'd like to invest in something you can both enjoy. Tell her you can't afford it (if you can't). Tell her you could consider that if you downsize your current house, or whatever.
If she really gives one word answers, take it up at therapy. You can't just have her ask for things like a child, then say "no" like you are the adult. That is not how marriages work. There needs to be compromise, give and take. You can't compromise if you don't discuss.
Not saying I'm going to do it, but, I know her, and there's only 1 thing that will get her to talk to me. Starts with a J, ends with -ewelry
someone please slap me for getting involved in this silly thread.
you, irish...are just feeding into this whole thread with such stupidity. this cannot be real. i am sorry but this is so ridiculous. i'm amazed at all the people who are sucked in and continue to keep this thread going. if all of this is true, your life with your wife, and this whole thing...you two are so superficial that you can't actually ever have a real conversation with each other about real life, then you are two very sad human beings. i don't believe a word of any of this.
This thread has the second highest number of posts of all time on the non-romantic relationships forum.
You've also posted about the situation (not including Rachel, but this thread is not primarily about the situation with her) on the parenting and relationships forums, generating hundreds of replies.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems that you've only taken one piece of advice offered. One. That was to attend counseling. But here's the thing. Simply making an appointment and sitting in some chairs in a counselor's office doesn't do diddly squat. I see very little evidence based on your posts that even you, much less your wife, are actually taking counseling seriously. It's just even more money going down the drain.
I don't think you're happy with the situation. If you were, it would be okay. But you wouldn't be posting here about it if you weren't. So what are you doing to fix it? Posting play-by-play updates of everything your wife says on CD? It's almost like reading a drama. Perhaps it's about venting to you. If all you want is to vent, that's fine. However, I wouldn't expect anything to change.
I don't think you're happy with the situation. If you were, it would be okay. But you wouldn't be posting here about it if you weren't. So what are you doing to fix it? Posting play-by-play updates of everything your wife says on CD? It's almost like reading a drama. Perhaps it's about venting to you. If all you want is to vent, that's fine. However, I wouldn't expect anything to change.
Correction - you wouldn't be posting here about it if you WERE happy with it. Sorry for the typo.
I stopped thinking it was real a long time ago. Now it's just entertainment. No one with an ounce of self respect would be married to such a vacuous manipulator that is just in it for the money.
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