Why do people think that Northern Virginia is so unfriendly? (Manassas: neighborhood, buy)

[tysonsengineer]

Eh

I find new comers to be unfriendly. The people I have known all my life, and the ones who I can tell have been here all their life know that all things shall pass and that life is too short to be rushing around.

Enjoy your life folks, enjoy the little things, and consider that if you are stuck in traffic and being a grump that maybe its time that you change your pattern and cheer up. Atleast it seems that traffic is where I see it (or any line for that matter).

[stpickrell]

Originally Posted by tysonsengineer

Eh

I find new comers to be unfriendly. The people I have known all my life, and the ones who I can tell have been here all their life know that all things shall pass and that life is too short to be rushing around.

Enjoy your life folks, enjoy the little things, and consider that if you are stuck in traffic and being a grump that maybe its time that you change your pattern and cheer up. Atleast it seems that traffic is where I see it (or any line for that matter).

I think most people can identify folks with gargantuan chips on their shoulder.

[MySonsDad]

So this topic has been discussed in other threads as well. In my opinion, people in the NOVA area are VERY guarded and reclusive. I have lived here since Nov 2001 so I do speak from experience. I have also lived in several states. I have spent most of my time living in Prince William county. I don't know, maybe Maryland is different.

For example, we live in Gainesville area. I go out in the backyard to play with my sons. I RARELY see anybody come out of their house except to exercise. I NEVER see any parent play with their kids in their yards. For me, that's just odd. Sorry but it is. I can give more examples but I will stop there.

What it comes down to is nobody will approach you. If you want to start a conversation you must approach them. That's fine, I am not the one living in fear.

[seiketsu]

People think I'm unfriendly because I'm an introvert and I'm not nosy. I don't enjoy small talk. I'll say please and thank you during transactions, but I'm certainly not going to be chatty or ask you about your day if you are a complete stranger. When I'm walking down the street, I'm lost in my own thoughts, so I probably don't have a smile on my face. Political folks aside, I think this area attracts a lot of introverts who are more comfortable with computers, numbers, or legal documents than with people. Since people here are from everywhere, I don't think you can chalk it up to a northern thing or a southern thing.

Then there are the people who are just plain stressed out and rude. But I think most of the "unfriendliness" people on this board perceive is just people minding their own business.

[bishie]

No comparison in friendliness to Southern California. I have lived on and off in NoVA since 1991 so it's not like I haven't had time to get to know people here. Yet I can count on one hand the number of conversations I have had with my neighbors here. People are significantly more rude here and it is very cliquish so you tend to only know people in your social circle. In California people might be late to appointments but in NoVA about 1/2 the time they don't even bother to show up. This is true in both social and business meetings. Although the schools are good on numeric metrics the social side is brutal so it is always a severe adjustment for your kids to move here. So your kids will be around high achievers but be depressed since friendships with classmates is so difficult here. I think the reason is the overcast weather makes people depressed here.

[CAVA1990]

Originally Posted by bishie

No comparison in friendliness to Southern California. I have lived on and off in NoVA since 1991 so it's not like I haven't had time to get to know people here. Yet I can count on one hand the number of conversations I have had with my neighbors here. People are significantly more rude here and it is very cliquish so you tend to only know people in your social circle. In California people might be late to appointments but in NoVA about 1/2 the time they don't even bother to show up. This is true in both social and business meetings. Although the schools are good on numeric metrics the social side is brutal so it is always a severe adjustment for your kids to move here. So your kids will be around high achievers but be depressed since friendships with classmates is so difficult here. I think the reason is the overcast weather makes people depressed here.

I haven't noticed too many depressed types. My neighbors are friendly and I interact with them regularly. We do a lot of community activities. We're also very welcoming to newcomers. We have a lot military officers who are used to moving to new places and initially being outsiders. They've developed good social skills. We have a lot of families with kids so that tends to bring people together .

[mayita]

I have lived in NOVA for 12 years. It is almost impossible to make friends, people is too self centered or just busy or social climbers/workholics.

I have a couple of good girlfriends (actually 3) one is from mexico, the other one from Puerto Rico and the other one a lady from Colorado. They are all transplants and feel the same way.

[CAVA1990]

It probably depends what kind of neighborhood you live in.

[mayita]

I work in DC and live in a regular neighborhood. Go to school here too. It is the same, it is the people that is attracted by the jobs in DC. Weird, materialistic unfriendly people.

[vabound2012]

When people say Northern Virginians are not "friendly," what do they really mean?
1. Unfriendly to the point of rude and yelling at people, including in professional arenas, if they do not like something?
or 2. Just so busy with their own lives that they do not stop to have casual conversations and "smell the roses"?