Why do people think that Northern Virginia is so unfriendly? (Richmond: transfer, schools)

[CuppaJoe]

I'm a native who has also spent time living in other East Coast cities and in Texas. NoVA IS unfriendly, and it's due to several reasons.

HUGE transient population: Most people who live here aren't from this area. It's understandable as there are a ton of jobs here, particularly in the Fed Gov. That being said, a lot of folks are overwhelmed when coming from elsewhere and clam up or get frustrated at the high pace.

Many transients are here for a few years, or less, and then move on to their ultimate goal or go back to their contract company's HQs. A large portion of these folks don't feel any attachment to the area, are here purely for work purposes, and don't care about your desire for small talk, friendliness.

Again, I've lived here from the 80s til now, I've seen and experienced the changes and speak the truth.

Remember when Springfield used to be a nice, safe, affordable area? Sigh...

Tons of traffic + long commutes: Saying traffic is brutal here would be an understatement. It's horrendous and several main routes are have been rendered undriveable due to sprawl (66, anyone?). People can't afford to live anywhere close to where they work, so they have to live in places like Fairfax, Ashburn, Chantilly, etc. These drives are murder. If you take Metro, it's very expensive and unreliable. AC doesn't work in the summers, and they're packed to the gills so much that one needs to usually wait for a few trains to pass the station until you can squeeze onto one. NoVA drivers in general are aggressive and don't employ common courtesy (blinkers, safe following distance. This is mainly due to the fact that every second counts when you have a 1.5 hr crawling commute ahead of you and you'll only get a couple hours at home before crashing and starting the whole process over again the next day.

High-stress jobs: Most jobs here are very high in responsibility, and thus stress. People work hard and work long. It shows.

Everything's very expensive: The cost of living is intense. People have to float massive mortgages. It shows.

Lack of "downtime" spots: There aren't many homegrown neighborhood pub-type spots, which stunts growth of community, togetherness, friendly chats. To appeal to the vast ocean of transient contractors and such, retail areas install big box, mainstream, corporate restaurants. This is also re-enforced by the crushing lease notes the owners must pay.

Weather: The summers are lengthy and hot+humid. The winters are lengthy and can be very cold. Spring and Fall go by quickly here, although they are indeed distinct seasons. Much of the year is extreme weather, and it puts people in a funk. It's often a topic of conversation in small talk. It doesn't both me, but it does most people.

Again - I'm from this area and love it in certain ways, but what I speak is simply the truth. I've never experienced the kind of indifference and often downright rude behavior present here, in places like Pennsylvania, Texas, or even NYC.

[I'm Retired Now]

In a previous job I used to do training for an offices all over the country for a very large company. Our Corporate HQ was in Northern VA but I had a chance to interact with our workers all over the country. It really opened my eyes to the nature of the people in the DC area in comparison to regular towns I traveled to like Raleigh, Little Rock, Kansas City, Tulsa, Des Moines and Phoenix.

While there was nice people and jerks in every town, if you picked out 100 people at random, 80 were really nice, friendly, kind and open to small talk in these regular towns and maybe 30 in the DC area. Northern VA professionals are more likely to be a grown up version of the snob kid in your hometown who left for the big city, who thought he was better than everyone else because the had a perfect GPA and High IQ.

[Old Monkey]

Originally Posted by I'm Retired Now

In a previous job I used to do training for an offices all over the country for a very large company. Our Corporate HQ was in Northern VA but I had a chance to interact with our workers all over the country. It really opened my eyes to the nature of the people in the DC area in comparison to regular towns I traveled to like Raleigh, Little Rock, Kansas City, Tulsa, Des Moines and Phoenix.

While there was nice people and jerks in every town, if you picked out 100 people at random, 80 were really nice, friendly, kind and open to small talk in these regular towns and maybe 30 in the DC area. Northern VA professionals are more likely to be a grown up version of the snob kid in your hometown who left for the big city, who thought he was better than everyone else because the had a perfect GPA and High IQ.

Why on earth would anybody deride academic achievement and intellectual acuity as a problem?

[FCNova]

I think CuppaJoe makes some good points, except I actually like the climate around here. Summer humidity can be tough, but winters are generally mild(our current one being an exception). I enjoy the season changes of the east coast, but further north has worse winters, and further south has worse humidity. Virginia seems to be a decent compromise.

[special mixx]

Originally Posted by FCNova

I think CuppaJoe makes some good points, except I actually like the climate around here. Summer humidity can be tough, but winters are generally mild(our current one being an exception). I enjoy the season changes of the east coast, but further north has worse winters, and further south has worse humidity. Virginia seems to be a decent compromise.

Compared to new york, jersey, parts of new england, some parts of california, and arizona, nova seems quite friendly. Maybe friendly is not the right word, it just seems less rude than those other places.
I like the climate of nova too, not the best but most winters are not as extreme as this one.

[Bigfoot424]

Originally Posted by FCNova

I think CuppaJoe makes some good points, except I actually like the climate around here. Summer humidity can be tough, but winters are generally mild(our current one being an exception). I enjoy the season changes of the east coast, but further north has worse winters, and further south has worse humidity. Virginia seems to be a decent compromise.

Believe it or not VA has basically the same humidity levels as our southern neighbors to include Fla. I was born in Fla and still visit often. The big difference is the shorter summers here but not the humidity level. I Googled this once and found negligible difference between Fla and Va.

[NOVA_guy]

I agree with what Special Mixx said. People here aren't perfect but compared to places like New York, New England or New Jersey we're not that unfriendly. Of course anywhere there is stressful living like people who have long commutes, sitting in traffic for hours, high cost of living and stressful jobs there's going to be unfriendly people but I don't think NoVA is that bad.

[terribletraffic]

O yeah, I would say the government is the real problem behind unfriendly environment. Who's happy with a government job and the job the government does? No one except those with a hand out.

The bigger it grows, the less friendly Nova has become and now is not as rude as other places... shows a trend. Lots of self absorbed people want to live in or near washington to think or show they are important. It's like the arrogance follows all the tax dollars into the capital: the closer you get to the center, the ruder they are.

Traffic is the worst problem by far. Traffic on the roads, traffic in line at the grocery store, traffic waiting for a tread mill at the gym... But it all comes from the government overpopulation of the area.

Due to the overabundance of "non essential" government jobs, this place is overpopulated for the resources, hence the lines, traffic, and high prices. I was so happy when the government shut down, I was hoping it would last forever. Look at how getting rid of all the non essential workers made life better! There was less traffic, smaller lines at chipotle, and eventhough they still got paid to stay home for 3 weeks, if they haden't, we would have been able to save some money on the deficit.

lol, the funniest thing was that the essential workers were pissed at the non essential workers for being able to stay home for 3 weeks and collect a pay check. You couldn't make this stuff up if you tried.

The other main reason, slow foreign drivers in the left hand lane driving with the high beam headlights on.

[Karrina Taylor Brown]

Originally Posted by Richmonder27

I grew up in Loudoun, and I think that Northern Virginia in terms of friendliness is just about average with the rest of the nation. Its not great, its not horrible either. I find places such as New England and The Northeast cities a lot worse !

If you compare Northern Virginia to Southern or Central Virginia or Shenandoah Valley especially, it may seem a lot less friendly. But I hardly think its the least friendly place in the world.

I have been to Atlanta and it was about like Northern Virginia in terms of friendliness. Maybe its changed a lot since I have lived there.

We found an end-unit townhouse in the middle of a court for my parents when they moved here to be close to us. They have made lots of friends on their court yard. If you want to make friends, take your children to the play ground, or your dogs on a walk, or offer help to those around you. I find it friendly here.

[Bigfoot424]

Originally Posted by terribletraffic

O yeah, I would say the government is the real problem behind unfriendly environment. Who's happy with a government job and the job the government does? No one except those with a hand out.

The bigger it grows, the less friendly Nova has become and now is not as rude as other places... shows a trend. Lots of self absorbed people want to live in or near washington to think or show they are important. It's like the arrogance follows all the tax dollars into the capital: the closer you get to the center, the ruder they are.

Traffic is the worst problem by far. Traffic on the roads, traffic in line at the grocery store, traffic waiting for a tread mill at the gym... But it all comes from the government overpopulation of the area.

Due to the overabundance of "non essential" government jobs, this place is overpopulated for the resources, hence the lines, traffic, and high prices. I was so happy when the government shut down, I was hoping it would last forever. Look at how getting rid of all the non essential workers made life better! There was less traffic, smaller lines at chipotle, and eventhough they still got paid to stay home for 3 weeks, if they haden't, we would have been able to save some money on the deficit.

lol, the funniest thing was that the essential workers were pissed at the non essential workers for being able to stay home for 3 weeks and collect a pay check. You couldn't make this stuff up if you tried.

The other main reason, slow foreign drivers in the left hand lane driving with the high beam headlights on.

Do you work for the government? If not, what makes you qualified to say this? I work for the govt and I like my work. I'm looking to move to another agency and I know I will enjoy it there as well.