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So someone who doesn't have a job can't have good character? That doesn't make any sense to me.
I actually said I DO NOT MEAN THEIR JOB.
People have lots of other roles than their careers.
What roles people choose is frequently a function of their character, so I would say what roles someone chooses to spend their time doing is related to their character.
People with poor character often end up doing not nice things.
Now I have no idea what the housewife without kids who calls herself a SAHM has in terms of "character" but she claims to be very talented and well educated. In my book someone that gifted should make time to share those gifts with others, one way or another.
I only can go by what people tell me. If they tell me they clean house and wait on their husband that is all I can go on.
If I have no idea what they do, I tend to assume most people on the planet do things for each other and the betterment of their society. I mean look at this board, nearly every single SAHM is volunteering for the school, helping their neighbors, taking care of elderly family members or others who cannot do for themselves. And if anyone has no time to spare, it is the SAHMS.
Seems the vast majority of people are doing ALOT. Makes those who do very little for other, especially when they have so much to offer, seem wasteful.
And I am not sure why you have "worthy" in quotes. I never mentioned this housewifes (NYsomethings) worth, especially since no one can assign someone worth, I said she doesn't have my respect. Someone with so much education (by her own admission) and so many skill has so much to offer even if it isn't at a paid job. I was raised to give back, everyone with what they can. Some can give more of themselves than other but everyone can give something. And those who are lucky enough to be very talented or educated can give back in ways the rest of us cannot.
And in reality, no one respects everyone. I also don't respect the guy in front of my car this morning who through an entire bag of litter into the road. What are you supposed to respect people for (or not in this case) if not their actions?
Regarding "worthy" - I was referring to worthy of respect. Again, why would anyone even need to rattle off their accomplishments to you in order to obtain respect? That's the part I have a difficult time with. There are all kinds of things one can do that have value. I believe you indicated earlier on (I could be wrong and am too lazy to go back and look...) that you could not respect someone who stayed home, with no kids and no job. I understand that you don't "get" it or that it may not be something you'd choose to do - which is fine. But it goes back to the same old thing. The choice. If it is working out for her family then why is it up to you (or me or anyone) to judge how she spends her time any more than she should judge you for how you spend yours?
They need to design toilet seats that attach to the bowl in such a way where you don't have to unscrew it once a week to clean the peeage that gunks up under there. I know, right? I'm the only girl in this house yet I'm the one cleaning up wayward pee.
And you can't be a SAHM if you don't have children.
Last edited by haggardhouseelf; 09-15-2011 at 05:07 PM..
They need to design toilets that attach to the bowl in such a way where you don't have to unscrew it once a week to clean the peeage that gunks up under there. I know, right? I'm the only girl in this house yet I'm the one cleaning up wayward pee.
And you can't be a SAHM if you don't have children.
Wayward pee! I love it, and I would definitely buy one of those toilet seats!
The secondary conversation going on in this thread is keeping me in stitches this afternoon, but I must make dinner for the young sprouts now that the witching hour is upon us. Ciao!
I really despise people who get off competing with others. Makes it even sadder when it's about who can do the most boring, mindless domestic chores in a specified time. But the saddest thing is the perpetual putting down of other women. We are all trying to do what's best for our families, and all of us live in different places, have different family structures, different incomes, different priorities. Why on earth is it important to compare our lot to others?
I really despise people who get off competing with others. Makes it even sadder when it's about who can do the most boring, mindless domestic chores in a specified time. But the saddest thing is the perpetual putting down of other women. We are all trying to do what's best for our families, and all of us live in different places, have different family structures, different incomes, different priorities. Why on earth is it important to compare our lot to others?
Exactly. You were much more diplomatic than I but this was what I was trying to say.
Regarding "worthy" - I was referring to worthy of respect. Again, why would anyone even need to rattle off their accomplishments to you in order to obtain respect? That's the part I have a difficult time with. There are all kinds of things one can do that have value. I believe you indicated earlier on (I could be wrong and am too lazy to go back and look...) that you could not respect someone who stayed home, with no kids and no job. I understand that you don't "get" it or that it may not be something you'd choose to do - which is fine. But it goes back to the same old thing. The choice. If it is working out for her family then why is it up to you (or me or anyone) to judge how she spends her time any more than she should judge you for how you spend yours?
You really should READ my posts.
"If I have no idea what they do, I tend to assume most people on the planet do things for each other and the betterment of their society."
That goes specifically AGAINST making people tell me what they do. BUT this person demanded that she be PRAISED by society for her role of housewife. Her husband may find her efforts solely on her and his behalf praiseworthy but I do not. Why should I or anyone else praise her for something that benefits no one else but her?
As for respect, if a woman CHOOSES to be a stripper or a prostitute, do you find that a "respectable" profession? If you do, that you and I are just going to have to disagree. But if you find that stripping is a waste of a woman's potential at a minimum, than I would say that I find someone using a plethora of talents solely for their own benefit to be a waste. To me and maybe not to you, and that is ok, life is about more than making your own nuclear family happy. But again, that maybe just a fundamental difference in how we approach the world. Different strokes and all. So while I fully support her right to choose whatever she wants, I bemoan the fact that we no longer have high expectations for people in terms of their "giving back".
And it is not a male vs. female thing. I expect everyone to give of themselves as they can, it is really the only way a society can succeed.
I think what the other poster is trying to say is that people who do nothing but take care of their own homes are not contributing to society. They have a heck of a clean house, but who does that benefit besides themselves? I noticed the housewife didn't say she does any volunteer work (at least not that I recall). A SAHM almost can't get away without volunteering somewhere, whether it is in the classroom, as a crossing guard, a soccer coach, whatever, she is contributing to society. Even just being another mom, home in the neighborhood, able to watch the kids get on and off the bus contributes to society. The other poster seems to spend her days exclusively on herself and on her own home. Fine, but she won't get kudos from anyone for doing that.
Now I have no idea what the housewife without kids who calls herself a SAHM has in terms of "character" ....
Yet you claim you do not respect her because she has poor character. That does not make any sense to me.
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