Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Not me...Mr. X knows that I would take him to the cleaners and back if he ever did and make his butt pay alimony for the rest of my life, I would purposely not get remarried just to teach him a lesson.
Haha! That made me LOL
As an update: I heard back from an attorney in her town who said she should NOT sign the house over to him, and in this economy the bank probably wouldn't let either one of them out of the mortgage despite their domestic issues. That was good to hear as she might listen since it's attorney's advice. I don't know all the implications, but I agree giving him the house just doesn't seem right and leaves her too vulnerable. I also found out they charge in the $150 range for an initial consultation, in her area. I'm looking around for her and offered to round up funds to pay for that, so money for the initial talk now shouldn't be an issue.
Thanks again to every one of you! I'm passing on pertinent info to her.
As an update: I heard back from an attorney in her town who said she should NOT sign the house over to him, and in this economy the bank probably wouldn't let either one of them out of the mortgage despite their domestic issues.
I learned something interesting recently about foreclosing. During a divorce, a friend of mine had to foreclose on rental property he and his wife owned during their marriage. Guess what? The IRS considers the balance of the mortgage to be income. He had to pay taxes on the 300k left on the mortgage! Who would have thought when you foreclose, you owe such high taxes. Sure, you can file for bankruptcy, but bankruptcy doesn't exempt from paying taxes.
Anyways, here's another interesting and relevant piece of information about foreclosures. Due to the recent economic climate and mortgage crisis, there was a federal law recently passed that allows for homeowners to remain in their homes for 12 months after foreclosing.
I learned something interesting recently about foreclosing. During a divorce, a friend of mine had to foreclose on rental property he and his wife owned during their marriage. Guess what? The IRS considers the balance of the mortgage to be income. He had to pay taxes on the 300k left on the mortgage! Who would have thought when you foreclose, you owe such high taxes. Sure, you can file for bankruptcy, but bankruptcy doesn't exempt from paying taxes.
Anyways, here's another interesting and relevant piece of information about foreclosures. Due to the recent economic climate and mortgage crisis, there was a federal law recently passed that allows for homeowners to remain in their homes for 12 months after foreclosing.
You are right about that. My parents divorce back in 1994 and they owned a house out in LI. The house foreclosed on and my mom got stuck with a huge $50k tax bill (that is a whole other story). My dad got away scot free without paying that freakin bill. My mom and I got into a car accident in 1995 and after it was found that she was not responsible for the accident she got a settlement. The court awarded her $43K which paid the bill and the IRS wiped the other bit of debt away.
Mrs Rhythm-- tell your friend not to blame herself for her husbands indiscretion and feel that she has to abide by his 'wishes' in order to cling onto something that isn't there anymore. She has every right to grieve the loss of her marriage to her friends but never shed a tear in front of that man. As Ivana Trump said in the First Wives Club: Ladies, you have to be strong and independent, and remember, don't get mad, get everything.
No matter how much an attorney costs the OP's friend has everything in her life at stake with an impending divorce. Although money is important it isn't the only thing that is at stake.
She needs to consider her kids and their future as well as her own. She has a job and can probably manage to keep a roof over he head however there are other significant expenses that she should make sure she gets him to cover. She needs to make sure she gets those things covered and that she gets it in writing. If Mr. Iwannabecivil changes his mind she needs to be protected.
In addition to expenses she need to get visitation hammered out. She needs to get child support hammered out. What happens if the ex wants to move out of the area where they currently live? What happens if she wants to move? What kind of space does she want the ex to maintain for the kids? Who is going to be allowed to be around the kids when they visit the ex?
All these things need to be hammered out before the divorce. If they are not hammed out beforehand she will not have a leg to stand on wrt these issues if something happens after the fact.
...... maybe he is leaving an opening. You could say hedging his bets. But maybe, just maybe,
1) Baloney. He'll come back with a hefty bag full of dirty laundry and tell her, "As long as you're doing the laundry can you just pop these into the machine?"
1) Baloney. He'll come back with a hefty bag full of dirty laundry and tell her, "As long as you're doing the laundry can you just pop these into the machine?"
Most likely and if he did she should wash them in a dirty toilet, air dry them and fold them back with a smile.
ETA...And Hopes thought I was the nice one out of the CDMWR bunch. :P
It always drives me crazy to hear people say they can't afford a lawyer when they risk losing EVERYTHING, especially when there are assets.
It's illogical. If they have assets to lose, they can afford a lawyer!
It's better to pay a few thousand dollars to a lawyer than to lose potentially hundreds of thousands in assets.
I agree with this statement.
A pity that most of the other statements on this thread vilify the man and glorify the woman. This sort of thing (all men are Bast$%^&) just contributes to the break up of marriages.
A pity that most of the other statements on this thread vilify the man and glorify the woman. This sort of thing (all men are Bast$%^&) just contributes to the break up of marriages.
Perhaps because in this case anyway, it's the man who is leaving his wife and children for another woman and her child?
Perhaps because in this case anyway, it's the man who is leaving his wife and children for another woman and her child?
In almost every case, as I understand it, the men leave for another woman.
As I understand it, usually, men go find the other woman and then move from the wife to the other woman. My understanding is that the tend to not simply leave their wife and live on their own. Genralisation I know. Probably due to men being lazy and insecure and wanting someone to do their washing and to cook for them.
It seems that women side with women when it comes to men leaving. The point that gets reinforced is that it is all his fault. He is a looser, abuser, lazy, bast%^*.
I suspect some wrong on both sides in almost every case.
How is it that once two people were in love and now one hates the other?
I think that parents become lazy when it comes to each other.
Mothers (again this is a sweeping generalisation) can become wrapped up in their kids or in mothers groups and the husband feels left out. He is getting no sex or not enjoyable sex. He may not even be getting love which is actualy different to sex. So he goes looking for whatever he once had but is missing.
Then he gets slammed by the women and the wife gets told she is wonderful and its all his fault.
They need to put effort. Conscious effort into each other.
A strong relationship between husband and wife means a stable and happy home for the kids.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
He had to pay taxes on the 300k left on the mortgage! Who would have thought when you foreclose, you owe such high taxes. Sure, you can file for bankruptcy, but bankruptcy doesn't exempt from paying taxes. 
