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a) break up with her now, suffer through some pain and be better off.
b) wait 6 months, suffer through some pain, but the break up will be easier because you will really hate her at that time. yourself for waiting 6 months.
c) wait until she decides to dump you.
What we all need to remember is that many of us probably had crazy-making relationships like this when we too were young and stupid. I know I did, and I wished that I wouldn't have wasted my time. I have the advantage of being decades older now, so I can look back and laugh at myself for making myself nuts over Some Dumb Guy who wasn't worth my time. It's a very distinct advantage. However, at the time, all I could think about was:
HIM
HIM
HIM
Gotta have ... HIM!!
(Never really knowing why, because HE didn't seem to have any redeeming qualities.)
What I mean to say is that the OP will probably stay with this girl and suffer it out until he figures out that she's a big waste of time. The infatuation stage is an extremely powerful stage, and lacking the experience to navigate one's way through it in a healthy manner, all sorts of shenanigans (read: drama, drama, drama!) seem like they're endurable. Or that they'll eventually pay off.
First i wanna say i love her to the bottom of my heart but sometimes i hate her so much it's unbelievable.
Well the thing is, me and my girlfriend are together for about 2 months now, and well yeah she is kinda my first TRUE love (I've had lots of girlfriends before but i never felt like this). I love her and i don't wanna lose her, but her actions make me crazy and make me wanna break up.. She always tries to make me jealous (She always tells me how guy are hitting on her and s*** and i know she likes it cause i think she needs all of the attention), i don't know why since i give enough compliments but sometimes i think my attention isn't enough for her. Everyday she tells me she loves me and never wanna lose me but i can't live with nor without her. I HATE how she always looks for attention, I HATE how she talks about other guys, I HATE how she's pissed when other girls talk to me, I HATE how manipulative she is, I HATE the fact she is a shopping maniac who always asks me for money (I don't have much but she get's everything she wants since i'm crazy about her). Yet, I LOVE HER!
I don't know what i should do since i really don't wanna lose her but staying with her might affect my personality. The thought of her going to another guy makes me crazy, i know she wouldn't go to another guy immediatly but in time she will. (I hate the thought of her having sex with someone else)
I'm asking you for help because i'm not the type of guy who would talk with other people about this, I don't show it neither i'm just dying inside. Help would be appreciated! Thanks
I would suggest that you ask her to go to relationship counseling w/ you, and that may help you decide if this relationship is even worth the efforts.
Here's the truth, relationships are supposed to be give and take, you should be able to say to her, I really am uncomfortable when you talk about other guys all the time. And she is supposed to make an effort to stop talking about other guys, since you told her how it makes you feel. That is the ideal. It sounds to me like you are actually in a one sided relationship...you give money on top of the emotional investment. Now, giving her money to waste when you don't have it to give is the wrong thing. But, here is a test, it may help you figure out how invested in you she is, ask her about not talking about other guys. She if she can do this for you. Also, next time she wants money, tell her you don't have any to spare because you are paying your bills. If she is less interested in you when you don't give her everything she wants...Than in my opinion she may be using you. There is no way for me to know of course, but when you tell someone yes all the time....and then finally say no, sometimes their attitude changes...and you may see the real person.
The only other suggestion that I have, is for you personally to read a book called, Co-Dependency No More...it may help you figure out why you are investing more in a relationship than you can afford to. And, it may help you to understand how to take better care of your own emotions, rather than getting lost in someone else. Taking care of yourself is very important to maintaining a healthy relationship. I wish you well
Get out while you can. Two months is nothing. Once you've invested years in this relationship (if you can call it out), you'll find it much more difficult to get out of it, but you'll have given her all your money. This is just the tip of the iceberg with this girl, my friend, and it's only going to get worse. Love yourself more than you love her and get the heck out!
You already know what you need to do. Like that old, cliched (but true) saying goes: "It's better to be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong ones." You'll be fine...promise!
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yourself for waiting 6 months.
