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Anybody here who got dumped for being unavailable?
I got dumped again for not returning a guy's call and for not texting him back. It wasn't intentional. I was just very busy with work. He called me to plan our date but there was so much things going on with my life that I totally forgot to call him back and to reply to his texts ( I've been working 12 hours and been working nights) Then he sent me a text saying that he has moved on. Ofcourse, I did not reply to it because it was too obvious that he dumped me and what else is there to say.
Its not the firs time that it happened so maybe I'm doing something wrong. I thought guys like women who have their own lives and not dependent on them? You know, women who have hobbies, an actual job and friends they hang out with.
It sucks getting dumped for something like this. Guys, what do you think am I doing wrong and how do I fix it?
This has happened more than once, so I would assume you realize that what you are doing doesn't work. If you do not have the time to answer a text, which only takes a few minutes, then you should not be dating. I am not talking about calling or texting all during the day, just answering him when you can, even with just a short text. I am sure lots of men like independent ladies, but there is a big difference between being independent and ignoring someone.
I hate to state the obvious here, but what the heck. He WASN'T all that into you, otherwise he wouldn't have dumped you so quickly. Doesn't matter that he was willing to drive the first two times...you just weren't worth the effort to him the last time, especially since he hadn't heard from you.
So...text him when you get off work. I am still not understanding the issue.
I work with kids all day. I can't turn my back on them, can't step out to pee and my phone is in my bag and on silent during working hours. I don't think about my missed calls or texts during the day at all either. My focus is my class.
However....if you recieved a call or text and noticed it after working hours, I'm not sure how it couldn't be on your mind to call him back. If you aren't looking at your phone during work then aren't you seeing these missed texts and calls when you turn your phone back on after work, during whatever free time you have at that moment? I mean you are looking at the text on your phone right? I can't understand how the call or text ISN'T on your mind at that point.
When I am done with work I turn my phone on and check for messages, texts and my calendar for the evening. If a text came in I give a quick response. If a call came in I listen to the message and either text back or call back when I have a few minutes (usually while I'm walking out to my car).
I don't really think he was being inconsiderate and selfish either. Why should his world revolve around you when you can't return a simple text? He assumed you were too busy for him, and he wasn't willing to waste his time waiting for you. You just aren't on the same page when it comes to communication.
I also noticed you posted on CD on Tuesday late afternoon, then again in the evening and then on Wed in the early morning....so you were REALLY busy at work saving lives and couldn't call him but you could post on here. See...you just weren't that into him otherwise you would have been calling or texting him at those times.
hahahaha OP just got owned.
No wonder she stopped responding after this. No way she could defend her actions now.
You say this has happened to you before. So the common thread is multiple men coming to the same conclusion. This leads me to conclude there is a common problem, namely your communication habits.
You had time to collect the voice mail. You had time to put on your jacket at the end of your shift. Therefore you had time to send a 15 second text. Nobody is saying you should take 3 hours for dinner, or go shopping for new clothes, or clean your apt/house before he comes over. Just say you got his message but you are busy.
If you are not happy about the common result with different men, then you need to change you, not them. I think communication is it.
Anybody here who got dumped for being unavailable?
I got dumped again for not returning a guy's call and for not texting him back. It wasn't intentional. I was just very busy with work. He called me to plan our date but there was so much things going on with my life that I totally forgot to call him back and to reply to his texts ( I've been working 12 hours and been working nights) Then he sent me a text saying that he has moved on. Ofcourse, I did not reply to it because it was too obvious that he dumped me and what else is there to say.
Its not the firs time that it happened so maybe I'm doing something wrong. I thought guys like women who have their own lives and not dependent on them? You know, women who have hobbies, an actual job and friends they hang out with.
It sucks getting dumped for something like this. Guys, what do you think am I doing wrong and how do I fix it?
Are you really really asking for advice, or are you wanting us to talk bad about this dude?
Yeah...what he said. The guy called you, and you "forgot" to return his call....for how long?
Guys DO like women that have their own lives, but that doesn't mean that you ignore people, or forget about them.
This is true. I mean if I got a text discussing some plans by my girlfriend I would have found at least 1 minute of my time to respond and either say, "I'm busy now honey, we'll talk about it later...love you" or "Yeah, that sounds good, let's make it 7pm on Tuesday". I mean, when you have 12 hours and you can't find one minute after your done relieve yourself in the bathroom to text your boyfriend that you love and care about I would take it as being ignored as well. Maybe he had to find out what the plan was from her because he had to plan out his own schedule as well, but the only thing that mattered to the OP was that she was so busy to the extent that she couldn't even take 2 seconds to respond. I bet if it was a family member who got in a car accident or something that she would have dropped what she was doing. Maybe to this guy what he had to plan was really serious to him and he felt she must not have felt the same by not taking a minute or two to respond after 12 hours going by. Who knows...
[quote=lmw36;27448290]I'm not saying you're wrong, but to be fair, my mother (nurse) isn't allowed to have her phone on herself unless it's during her lunch break.
quote]
But the OP didn't respond the whole day she mentioned 12 hours..No text on a lunch break or on the way home is a lack of respect to someone you are in a relationships with. It's a cop out to say that the rules of not having your cell phone on you at work are what prevents you from checking it. I don't care what the rules are, I will follow the rules by not talking, but you better beleive I have my phone on vibrate at all times and check it when it vibrates just in case there is an emergency in my family or something serious. I would have responded that I was busy if I wasn't able to talk. Takes a few seconds.
Like what I said that night was crazy busy that I couldn't take a break to make a personal call or even pee.
Sorry, but this is bs. I wasn't there, but I have had that rumble in my stomach , you know the one where you are stuck in traffic and praying to God to get you to a bathroom, the rumble that produces the Hershey squirts? and when that comes, nothing else is a priority over that. You can't do a poker face on natural bodily functions, we all have them. Don't tell us you peed down your leg because you were too busy.
He should of let you respond then ignored your text for a day or so. Guessing game isn't so fun then.
Should HAVE!!! It's a VERB. Come on.
Jeez Raena....you're driving me nuts!!
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