How many men are really marriage-minded nowadays? (party, ceremony, perspective)
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If women buy 91% of new homes, why are men always whining that the wife ends up with the house the husband paid for?
the 91% figure is...uh....not true.
About 20% of homes are bought by single women.
I imagine the 91% figure is somehow fabricated through couples buying homes and then saying that women purchased them and neglecting to mention that a man was also involved.
Those figures are misleading at best, and absolute bunk in reality.
Doubtful. But usually, there are only 3 reasons a man will reject a woman: If he does not find her physically attractive; if he does not think she is a nice person; or if he does not think they have anything in common. Barring those three things, men aren't picky about much else. Although I'm sure there are exceptions.
I completely agree with you 110% . I've often assumed the first two, but I've never given much thought to the third one (he does not think they have anything in common) until now. Great post.
The bottom line for women is this: If you are kind, attractive, and not overly picky, you won't have problems finding someone to marry you. If you are a woman who is either mean or unattractive, or you are very picky, it is going to be a lot harder for you to find someone.
The institution of marriage isn't going away anytime soon. If you are a great girl, you'll likely find plenty of guys happy to settle down with you.
If this was the solution, then it would've worked out long ago and the stories of ''forever live-in gfs'' would be reducing greatly.
I'm starting to think that sometimes it's only pure luck. While certain women have found him earlier, others (who have all the qualities you've mentioned above) can't get a single man to commit to them.
If this was the solution, then it would've worked out long ago and the stories of ''forever live-in gfs'' would be reducing greatly.
I'm starting to think that sometimes it's only pure luck. While certain women have found him earlier, others (who have all the qualities you've mentioned above) can't get a single man to commit to them.
Well i dunno then... all i know is i'd give my right arm for a woman who is kind, moderately attractive, and generous in the bedroom.
There is no point to a marriage with this list. Basically any trouble and you are out. Drug abuse is illness. Heavy drinking is illness. Neither drug abuse nor drinking just pop up out of nowhere on the 2nd year of marriage. You just can't hide those predispositions. Why marry in the first place? If it's something (rare) that developed during a marriage - suck it up to the end. "Cheating" - OK. "Mistreatment of children" - is rather a philosophical and loosely defined, it could be little more than different approaches to raising them. "Controlling and demanding" is so loose, it can mean anything. "Mental illness" is illness covered by "till death us do part". "Choosing not to get help" for something that's poorly defined = my way or highway. Why marry with that attitude?
Well lucky for us women you are not making the laws
We can choose who we want to marry and we can choose to divorce and guess what...we don't even have to give a reason anymore.
Your judgmental, antiquated views are dead like the dodo thank goodness. I suggest you evolve a bit.
Once again, the problem is NOT marriage. Marriage itself is inherently good for people and society. The problem is easy access to divorce and the devastating effects, which causes people (mostly men) to not want to get married. This gets simplified with the phrase "marriage is bad for men" but it is inaccurate since not all couples divorce.
If people do not profit from divorce, where did the phrase "take HIM to the cleaners" come from? If he is being taken to the cleaners (aka losing), then who is the winner in that situation?
Also, profit is in the eye of the beholder. To some people, being able to stay home and not work IS profiting. I have a cousin who is an average truck driver, really good guy. His ex wife stopped working after the divorce and lives off the child support (2 kids). She lived in the same house (same standard of living), drives a better vehicle, goes on vacations often, and actually has a better quality of life since she lost nothing and gained free time. Is that not profiting?
Anyone sue for anything, but it's less likely for a long, drawn out legal battle to occur if two people cohabitated in a non-common law marriage state. A person's claim would get thrown out faster than a divorce situation would have been resolved, and the legal fees would be greatly reduced.
I'm not sure what to think about the situation with your cousin. I'd have to know more details, especially the age of the kids, potential child care costs etc. Most women I know recognize that staying out of the job market can be quite devastating, so it really wouldn't be a profitable situation for someone like me in the long run. OTOH, the kids having a mom that is less stressed because she isn't working is profitable for them.
I obviously don't know every detail with your cousin so it would be hard to judge. I know that if I'd divorce one just simply can't manufacture money that isn't there to "profit" and manage two households.
I'm not sure why you think the effects of divorce are only devastating for men. The effects certainly go well beyond financial aspects.
I'm not sure what to think about the situation with your cousin. I'd have to know more details, especially the age of the kids, potential child care costs etc.
Ages 6 and 11. They are both in school and there is no child care cost.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Betsy84
Most women I know recognize that staying out of the job market can be quite devastating, so it really wouldn't be a profitable situation for someone like me in the long run. OTOH, the kids having a mom that is less stressed because she isn't working is profitable for them.
If an able-bodied person doesn't want to work, they shouldn't do it on another person's dime, especially when their choice not to work increases the other person's expenses and decreases their ability to support themselves.
Staying at home has not made her a better or less stressed mother. He is considered the better parent by far, according to both his and her family members.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Betsy84
I obviously don't know every detail with your cousin so it would be hard to judge. I know that if I'd divorce one just simply can't manufacture money that isn't there to "profit" and manage two households.
She got "tired" of being married because she'd been with the same guy since high school. He's a very kind-hearted person, I say this objectively, as I have other cousins who aren't and I easily call them out.
In regards to profit, the money is there, he's just living hand to mouth to make it and support her "lifestyle". If she had a job, even part time while the kids are in school, his child support would be less. I let him move into one of my houses for a few years, just so he could get some relief on his personal expenses while paying off the divorce fees.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Betsy84
I'm not sure why you think the effects of divorce are only devastating for men. The effects certainly go well beyond financial aspects.
They are MORE devastating, not ONLY devastating for the breadwinner and for the person who is not considered by the court to be the primary caregiver. Usually the man is in both of these positions.
Why does everyone read "only" when I clearly say "more"? I am not saying women do not suffer from divorce. Many do.
Men are dumba**es for not getting a prenup when they get married. I'm a women and although I dont plan on marrying, I would never do it without a prenup.
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. I've often assumed the first two, but I've never given much thought to the third one (he does not think they have anything in common) until now. Great post.
