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Not necessarily, an insecure man with money is still insecure and would never know if he is desired for himself or for his money and gifts, which to me seems a terrible way to live.
So? He gets a hot chick to bang, she gets presents and money.
Seems like they should both be happy. If he's willing to buy love, that's the outcome he should expect.
...expressing frustration at women obsessed with money, or are they really expressing envy of men who are more successful than they are?
I ask because a lot of complaints about "gold-digging" are tinged with a subtle suggestion that wealthy men are getting access to women they don't really deserve...
I would say it is a bit of both depending on the situation. On one hand, I think many men would envy the man who can spend his way to a relationship. On the other hand, I think said men would also resent the idea of having to do that just to get a woman. I would say it is both being jealous and being frustrated at a woman who only cares about money. And it depends on the situation too.
I don't have the money to spend on a woman to get her lavish stuff. For me, it isn't so much the envy, but that I resent having to even have that kind of money. Sometimes I have to wonder "what about things like love, values, actually building a relationship instead of a constant obsession over money".
So? He gets a hot chick to bang, she gets presents and money.
Seems like they should both be happy. If he's willing to buy love, that's the outcome he should expect.
That is the difference between the way I think and how many other persons think. I don't want to buy love. Love isn't something you're suppose to buy. It's suppose to be in someone's heart. It is suppose to be about building and cultivating a relationship rather than buying one. Will a gold-digger stick around when the money runs out? If the answer is no, then I don't want that woman anyway.
Why would a guy complain about gold diggers if it isn't his gold they're after??
I think many guys use the gold digger label for any woman who doesn't pony up cash on the first date. These men think the women are after their copper-heavy piggy banks. Funny.
that is so pathetic. Separates the men from the boys! Whoever asks a person out is the one who pays for dinner. That's called common politeness, something a lot apparently don't know. And every man who claims women want them to buy them things are the ones that have no gold to dig.
MANY men throughout history have 'bought their wives things', what do u think stay at home moms are?! It's called LOVE. If you love someone, you divide up the chores of life and form a partnership. She has to contribute by making meals, cleaning, doing something to run a household whilst not working on a payroll! It has worked that way for centuries, and men don't complain about it, because they don't want to raise kid (s) or have those responsibilities. SO many women have ZERO work ambitions, while I have been working and gaining my MBA and remain single.
So, if it were true that men don't want to take care of women, they wouldn't keep MARRYING and having their wives stay home with the children, not working. That's what real men do, because they realize the vast majority of women do not make as much at their jobs as a 'family man' does. Why do you think it's called 'aid to dependent women and children' and not 'aid to dependent men and children'???
that is so pathetic. Separates the men from the boys! Whoever asks a person out is the one who pays for dinner. That's called common politeness, something a lot apparently don't know. And every man who claims women want them to buy them things are the ones that have no gold to dig.
MANY men throughout history have 'bought their wives things', what do u think stay at home moms are?! It's called LOVE. If you love someone, you divide up the chores of life and form a partnership. She has to contribute by making meals, cleaning, doing something to run a household whilst not working on a payroll! It has worked that way for centuries, and men don't complain about it, because they don't want to raise kid (s) or have those responsibilities. SO many women have ZERO work ambitions, while I have been working and gaining my MBA and remain single.
So, if it were true that men don't want to take care of women, they wouldn't keep MARRYING and having their wives stay home with the children, not working. That's what real men do, because they realize the vast majority of women do not make as much at their jobs as a 'family man' does. Why do you think it's called 'aid to dependent women and children' and not 'aid to dependent men and children'???
Men complaining that everybody is a goldigger can be similar to women who complain that all men want is sex. That separates women from the girls. Those are the girls who nobody sees as attractive.
that is so pathetic. Separates the men from the boys! Whoever asks a person out is the one who pays for dinner. That's called common politeness, something a lot apparently don't know. And every man who claims women want them to buy them things are the ones that have no gold to dig.
MANY men throughout history have 'bought their wives things', what do u think stay at home moms are?! It's called LOVE. If you love someone, you divide up the chores of life and form a partnership. She has to contribute by making meals, cleaning, doing something to run a household whilst not working on a payroll! It has worked that way for centuries, and men don't complain about it, because they don't want to raise kid (s) or have those responsibilities. SO many women have ZERO work ambitions, while I have been working and gaining my MBA and remain single.
So, if it were true that men don't want to take care of women, they wouldn't keep MARRYING and having their wives stay home with the children, not working. That's what real men do, because they realize the vast majority of women do not make as much at their jobs as a 'family man' does. Why do you think it's called 'aid to dependent women and children' and not 'aid to dependent men and children'???
It's actually Aid to Families With Dependent Children, if you're talking about the U.S. The days of women being dependent on men are long gone here now. Or dang well should be.
I'll pay for myself on a date, thanks. I'm a grown woman. I've got my own wallet. Buying me dinner doesn't impress me because I can do that myself. Making a lot of money doesn't impress me because I can do that myself. Buying dinner is the easy way out, and too many men want to take the easy way out.
Yes, I'm one of those horrible women who expect men to actually be likable and have something to offer in terms of personality, companionship, and emotional connection. Truly a travesty to have such great expectations, I know.
Location: Formerly Pleasanton Ca, now in Marietta Ga
10,351 posts, read 8,572,211 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by goawayjerk
that is so pathetic. Separates the men from the boys! Whoever asks a person out is the one who pays for dinner. That's called common politeness, something a lot apparently don't know. And every man who claims women want them to buy them things are the ones that have no gold to dig.
MANY men throughout history have 'bought their wives things', what do u think stay at home moms are?! It's called LOVE. If you love someone, you divide up the chores of life and form a partnership. She has to contribute by making meals, cleaning, doing something to run a household whilst not working on a payroll! It has worked that way for centuries, and men don't complain about it, because they don't want to raise kid (s) or have those responsibilities. SO many women have ZERO work ambitions, while I have been working and gaining my MBA and remain single.
So, if it were true that men don't want to take care of women, they wouldn't keep MARRYING and having their wives stay home with the children, not working. That's what real men do, because they realize the vast majority of women do not make as much at their jobs as a 'family man' does. Why do you think it's called 'aid to dependent women and children' and not 'aid to dependent men and children'???
Your screen name pretty much reveals what attitudes you probably have.
I’m traditional and typically would pay for the first date. With some much talk of independent women who don’t need a man it seems fair to split the tab. I had a friend who dated a woman who made 4x his income of 100k. She made him pay for everything except on his birthday she bought him dinner. Is this the common politeness you speak of?
One of my friends got set up on a date with my girlfriends friend. They had met before and talked. He’s worried about gold diggers because he does well. For her though he took her out to a very nice dinner and was very excited about the prospect of it going further. I found out from my girlfriend she has no physical attraction at all to him but hey she got a nice dinner out of it. He’s very disappointed and I feel for him.
I think modern dating is vastly different than even as recent as 10 years ago.
Location: Formerly Pleasanton Ca, now in Marietta Ga
10,351 posts, read 8,572,211 times
Reputation: 16698
Quote:
Originally Posted by TeaByrd
It's actually Aid to Families With Dependent Children, if you're talking about the U.S. The days of women being dependent on men are long gone here now. Or dang well should be.
I'll pay for myself on a date, thanks. I'm a grown woman. I've got my own wallet. Buying me dinner doesn't impress me because I can do that myself. Making a lot of money doesn't impress me because I can do that myself. Buying dinner is the easy way out, and too many men want to take the easy way out.
Yes, I'm one of those horrible women who expect men to actually be likable and have something to offer in terms of personality, companionship, and emotional connection. Truly a travesty to have such great expectations, I know.
I like your style. Dating is about meeting someone to see if you click, not about getting a free meal.
I wish all people had your expectations!
One of my friends got set up on a date with my girlfriends friend. They had met before and talked. He’s worried about gold diggers because he does well. For her though he took her out to a very nice dinner and was very excited about the prospect of it going further. I found out from my girlfriend she has no physical attraction at all to him but hey she got a nice dinner out of it. He’s very disappointed and I feel for him.
There are literally threads of Tick Tok and You tube videos where women are bragging about their list of men who will buy them dinner whenever they want. It's no wonder young men are so guarded these days but honestly... fool me once, shame on you. If you buy someone dinner, it's their turn to invite you next time or clearly they're not interested.
Men complaining that everybody is a goldigger can be similar to women who complain that all men want is sex. That separates women from the girls. Those are the girls who nobody sees as attractive.
I am curious, what makes a woman a "real" woman?
What makes a "gold-digger" a "gold-digger?"
Seems to me that the men who think of women to be "gold-diggers" are really women who want an equitable 'split'. Not necessarily an EQUAL split...but an equitable one.
Funny...some of the men who refer to some women as 'gold-diggers' are 'gold-diggers' themselves....
Go figure...
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