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Why do you think that anyone OTHER than me should dictate what I want from a man in a relationship. Get over yourself. "Equal rights" have nothing to do with a relationship, dude. That is a legal issue. You are very confused.
It's endlessly amusing how many women use this excuse. "Relationships between the genders have nothing to do with equal rights." Yeah, except when men thought that women should stay at home to raise kids, which they decided was NOT a relationship issue. I'm not arguing one way or the other for it, I'm just pointing out the hypocrisy and B.S. "logic" there. (That's logic as in women's logic, as in "it doesn't make any actual sense, but that's OK because I'm a woman.")
It's endlessly amusing how many women use this excuse. "Relationships between the genders have nothing to do with equal rights." Yeah, except when men thought that women should stay at home to raise kids, which they decided was NOT a relationship issue. I'm not arguing one way or the other for it, I'm just pointing out the hypocrisy and B.S. "logic" there. (That's logic as in women's logic, as in "it doesn't make any actual sense, but that's OK because I'm a woman.")
So if a woman agrees that women should stay home and raise the kids, does it then become acceptable for her to want men to pay for dates and give women financial support?
If as you say, the planner pays, I suggest you simply let the guy plan and be happy with wherever he decides to take you.
When you are ready to plan and pay, you take him where you'd like.
^^^this. Whoever plans and initiates the date pays. If you want to go to more expensive places then you suggest it and you pay. If he is planning the date he should go where he can afford. Seems pretty simple.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2mares
^^^this. Whoever plans and initiates the date pays. If you want to go to more expensive places then you suggest it and you pay. If he is planning the date he should go where he can afford. Seems pretty simple.
So if a woman agrees that women should stay home and raise the kids, does it then become acceptable for her to want men to pay for dates and give women financial support?
^^^this. Whoever plans and initiates the date pays. If you want to go to more expensive places then you suggest it and you pay. If he is planning the date he should go where he can afford. Seems pretty simple.
I would agree with this 100%. But IME, the guy is initiating dates 99% of the time. For women, this is some sort of self-validation process (if he likes me, then he asks me out). Therefore, this ends up always falling on the guy.
My income at this point is fairly middle of the road for my age group. I've dated men who make a lot less than me and dated men who make 3 or 4 times what I make. Typically, we split it - I'm a foodie but like to do it on the cheap, so when it's my turn for a date, I'll cook or take him to a cheap but delicious taqueria or dim sum. I also make extensive use of Groupons and other deals to make dates more affordable.
A lot of men insist on paying no matter what the income level is. I'll be honest, if a guy who I know makes less than me insists on paying, I'm likely to walk away. I'm made less uncomfortable when it's someone who makes a lot more than me. For instance, two of my exes were engineers at name-brand tech firms when I was either in college or just out in my first job. They tended to pay for everything - even one paying for groceries so I could cook (though he claimed that it was cheaper than what he'd do if he was alone - order take out). One in particular was a huge foodie and his average night out was more expensive than a special night out for me. Therefore, he paid most of the time because he expected a certain level of food, drink, and ambiance that we wouldn't get if we were splitting.
It's something to discuss up front. I never make assumptions and always expect to split. That's why the first few dates are always coffee, ice cream, and other cheap things to avoid the awkwardness of who gets the bill.
My income at this point is fairly middle of the road for my age group. I've dated men who make a lot less than me and dated men who make 3 or 4 times what I make. Typically, we split it - I'm a foodie but like to do it on the cheap, so when it's my turn for a date, I'll cook or take him to a cheap but delicious taqueria or dim sum. I also make extensive use of Groupons and other deals to make dates more affordable.
A lot of men insist on paying no matter what the income level is. I'll be honest, if a guy who I know makes less than me insists on paying, I'm likely to walk away. I'm made less uncomfortable when it's someone who makes a lot more than me. For instance, two of my exes were engineers at name-brand tech firms when I was either in college or just out in my first job. They tended to pay for everything - even one paying for groceries so I could cook (though he claimed that it was cheaper than what he'd do if he was alone - order take out). One in particular was a huge foodie and his average night out was more expensive than a special night out for me. Therefore, he paid most of the time because he expected a certain level of food, drink, and ambiance that we wouldn't get if we were splitting.
It's something to discuss up front. I never make assumptions and always expect to split. That's why the first few dates are always coffee, ice cream, and other cheap things to avoid the awkwardness of who gets the bill.
Wow, is that a woman's way of saying I refuse to pay for a date at a expensive restaurant?
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"Equal rights" have nothing to do with a relationship, dude. That is a legal issue. You are very confused.
