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As an example, when I see people of either gender refer to themselves as old-fashioned types (however you choose to define that), the guy defines it by HIS contributions and the woman defines it by.....HIS contributions. (e.g. guy: "I'm old fashioned, I like to do x, y z." woman: "I'm old fashioned, I like the guy to do x, y, z")
Right. Or, it'll be "I'm old fashioned, I choose to stay at home," which isn't actually old-fashioned, strictly speaking. Old fashioned would be "I stayed at home because that was my role."
I always pay for dates, I'd feel like a chump if I didn't.
I've dated 2 women who I know made more than me, or were well off. They both offered to pay but I paid anyway. One was a real estate agent and owned quite a few businesses in town, the other was just from very wealthy family. They had just moved over from Holland.
Struck out with them both after a couple weeks. Oh well!
No, they do, but my point was that they prefer it because they've been told by society that "this is what REAL men do." Moreover, men are pretty easy-going, unlike feminists. Like, as long as the woman isn't screeching about equality the whole time, most guys have no problem paying. But if you're going to keep discussing equality, then most guys will go "OK, here's some equality for you. It's called a bill."
Point is that women never are stridently lecturing people about equality on dates. Why? Because the date is completely skewed towards favoring the woman. Consequently, they just sit there and smile. And most guys, if not being lectured, are fine with being "gentlemen." The feminist women only start yammering when a situation presents itself that is NOT in their favor. And that is never when the bill arrives.
I paid for at least half of my dates and I'm a feminist. It's called being in a relationship. The first date the guy pays. The second date I paid. I like my door opened, but I will also open the door for the guy.
I'm not sure why you are so angry about feminists? Some feminists are crazy, but most are regular people. The same can be said about any subsection of men. Some are crazy, but most are not.
I have had some freakishly awful guys date me, but I don't think all men are like that.
Used? I asked them out, why should they pay? It's not like 100 dollars over a couple weeks is gonna send me to the poor house. If I was working in the park crew at the mountain making 8 bucks an hour maybe I'd think different, but money isn't really something I'm that concerned about anymore. If I was struggling to feed myself I wouldn't aggressively date, I'd improve myself and date if I happened to meet someone.
Different strokes bro.
I don't really care about all the gender roles and what have you.
How do you know how much somebody you just started dating makes? What do yall do compare W2 forms on the first date?
It's pretty clear if you ever talk about work. I live in an expensive metro. If you live in an outer neighborhood with roommates, i can make a pretty good approximation of your salary vs mine. It isn't especially important unless it manifests itself somehow in your behavior.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sobaloba
A lot of women ask guys what they do as soon as they meet and are then immediately able to gauge their estimated income. I'm generally asked what I do within the first three to four questions when I meet a woman (and usually not ever by a guy).
You probably only notice it because the asker is female. It is a common getting to know you questions for people whe are culturally American.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 14Bricks
Is that on your end or their end? I wouldn't care if a woman made more than me, as long as she didn't try to throw it in my face and as long as she knew that I'm the man in the relationship.
Their end. It sounds strange but it happens. It is pretty nuanced though. It happens most often when there is both an income and social class gap.
Please try to pay attention to posters like Marshall - you have a lot to learn.
There is nothing to learn.
I have split the bill plenty of times and the world didn't exploud. All Marshall does is do the traditional thing some people get this do it differently gasp welcome to the world.
Whether he is being "used" or not is up to Marshall but there is nothing learn from him just because you like his traditional way of doing things doesn't mean everyone has jump on board.
Besides I think 14Bricks is already in a relationship and whatever it is is working.
I have split the bill plenty of times and the world didn't exploud. All Marshall does is do the traditional thing some people get this do it differently gasp welcome to the world.
You mean to tell me that when you didn't treat your date like the dainty, feminine flower that she is, that she didn't up and leave you in the dust for Marty Moneybags who pays for everything freely and blindly? What in the hell is this world coming to?!?! Traditional values and such. Shouting! Anger spurred on by irrational thinking! It's in the bible, it's just gotta be in the bible somewhere how you treat a date.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaybirdX
Whether he is being "used" or not is up to Marshall but there is nothing learn from him just because you like his traditional way of doing things doesn't mean everyone has jump on board.
But with their deluded rationale, it follows that nobody would ever want to date someone who is a contrarian to traditional dating etiquette. I mean, forget about how dating has evolved (with OLD and such) in comparison to what it was back in the day (where you only dated somebody you knew well). I should be treated like a lady, dammit! You may as well give me 50% of your assets now, before you get the check. Because entitlement and access to my vajayjay.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaybirdX
Besides I think 14Bricks is already in a relationship and whatever it is is working.
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