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Damn you're good. To answer your question, yes. After being friends for 14 years I guess he couldn't take it anymore. I thought he was bluffing, but apparently not.
Honestly, after 14 years I would expect one of three things. A relationship with someone else that kills those feelings, the friendship fades, or we married each other. How could he hang on for 14 years and not either fall for someone else or his feelings fade? Hanging on that long, and with those kind of feelings, just sounds foolish on his part. Most of the crushes I had on women in my life that lasted over 2 years, and we were friends, all the friendships faded or we both just moved on from each other. No hard feelings, but our lives evolved into something more meaningful than our friendship together. I've had 3 crushes in 30 years that lasted longer than 2 years and two of them were junior high/high school crushes/close friendships.
Let me guess. He had romantic aspirations for you but you didn't for him. That is the most common reason why men stop being friends with a woman, when he realizes he won't get out of the friend zone. I find it impossible to be friends with a woman that I am attracted to.
Yeah, I've never been attracted to any of my guy friends. I had a guy "friend" stick around for 10 years before he threw in the towel. A romance between us was just never going to happen. Then, I had another longtime guy "friend" who followed the orders of his EX-girlfriend when she told him that he couldn't associate with me. Not that I was really surprised since this was a guy who financially supported another one of his ex-girlfriends after she left him for another guy just because he was so desperate to stay in contact with her. Idiot.
So yeah, the guy friend thing hasn't really worked out too well for me.
So yeah, the guy friend thing hasn't really worked out too well for me.
Is it true that guy friends just stick around because they hope to hit it someday? Because I have several guy friends, who I've known for years and I'm always worried about that.
I find it interesting how you state hyperbolic statements as fact. And yet, at 25, you've never been with a woman. But you know these concepts to be absolute truth. How does one become so knowledgeable with little to no practical experience?
Quote:
Originally Posted by DavidRudisha
With regards to looks, most people simply want someone who is sexually attractive to them. I don't see guys going for the top 1%. It's more like the top 10%, and you can't blame them, because they're not sexually attracted to the bottom 90%. It's the same way for women. I can't blame women for not wanting to date me or anyone else in the bottom 90%. I fully expect women to continue and try for the top percentile of males until they get one or are forced to settle with someone like me. That's completely logical.
I think he is right to some extent about average women , but I also have to agree with you too. From my observation and experience some women told me that they need to be physically drawn to a man. And these women are being real, it's not about being drawn to a man's money which she can provide on her own or even his personality which goes out the window. I had 1 woman I seeing she is about a 5 in looks and she is chubby, not that pretty unless she dolls herself up. She told me she had to be sexually attracted to a guy and it did no matter if I had anything good going on in my life. Not all women are like that, they are some that cares about a man's personality which they type is hard to find except running into a hopeless romantic woman. I read an article from some dating expert guy who tells woman not to date guys who they feel physically, sexually attracted to or share some chemistry. According to him these relationships do not last.
Is it true that guy friends just stick around because they hope to hit it someday? Because I have several guy friends, who I've known for years and I'm always worried about that.
LOL, yes sometimes that is the case. I don't think my guy friend who stuck around for 10 years was completely like that though. He was open to "hitting it" (he unsuccessfully tried to convince me that it's better to lose your virginity and have "practice sex" with a friend than with someone who you really like so that you can be sexually experienced when the time comes to do it with someone else) but I do think that he also cared about me as a friend. Still didn't work out though.
I have never been the guy friend because I don't accept the friend zone but I know how it would feel. Giving advice to the girl you like on how to get a guy, where to find a good guy, why do guys suck, etc. when you are standing right in front of her but still invisible to her. Then when you see her dating and getting into a relationship with some other guy your guy friends starts getting all insecure and feeling inadequate because he is wondering what he doesn't have that the other guy does have.
Again this has NEVER happened to me because I don't accept the friend zone, I just know how it would feel if it did.
I think it's hilarious that people think that others are only attracted to the top 10% of people. Have you seen what most couples look like? Have you ever seen an adult movie? Have you ever seen a stripper or prostitute?
I used to work with ex prostitutes trying to change their lives while I was in college. I helped them find and wear clothing appropriate for job interviews and coached them. Trust me...they were not even in the top 35% for attractiveness.
People are attracted to all different kinds of people. Sexuality is not only about the classical definition of beauty. There are some amazing looking celebrities I have zero attraction for.
If people were only attracted to the top ten percent, we would be dying out.
I think he is right to some extent about average women , but I also have to agree with you too. From my observation and experience some women told me that they need to be physically drawn to a man. And these women are being real, it's not about being drawn to a man's money which she can provide on her own or even his personality which goes out the window. I had 1 woman I seeing she is about a 5 in looks and she is chubby, not that pretty unless she dolls herself up. She told me she had to be sexually attracted to a guy and it did no matter if I had anything good going on in my life. Not all women are like that, they are some that cares about a man's personality which they type is hard to find except running into a hopeless romantic woman. I read an article from some dating expert guy who tells woman not to date guys who they feel physically, sexually attracted to or share some chemistry. According to him these relationships do not last.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Yeah, unfortunately. As I near (in 4 days) the 4 mo mark with my current ladyfriend, I've learned that I'm just not good in relationships with people I really adore. I'm a good BF when I have emotional detachment, but when I'm invested, I just suck at it. It's been a brutal two weeks.
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