Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yes. This isn't what I've seen, not on a consistent enough basis to constitute a distinct pattern. Some women don't have trouble attracting male attention. Others do. However, what I have noticed is that on the rare occasion women complain about struggling to get dates in the same way some of the men here do, they're disbelieved. They're hit with a barrage of posts that say women have it made in dating, they have guys lined up daily asking for dates, all they have to do is choose among the dozens of daily offers. One gets the impression that only men are allowed to complain of being dateless, on C-D.
And for those women, I just want to see a pic. There's probably a pretty easy and quick explanation for their troubles.
I also think that a lot of these women are probably pretty standoffish. I can't tell you how many times I've been at a bar and looked over at a girl to find her with a disgusted look on her face like I'm some stalker or creep who shouldn't deserve to lay eyes on her, because I lost count.
Mod cut.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 01-10-2015 at 02:45 PM..
Reason: Talking about another C-D member.
Men fall into the same trap of wanting a woman who's slender, big boobs, smart, and can cook a 5 course meal.
Gawd, this is depressing! I guess this is one reason women say it takes a ton of weeding to find even a hope for a match on OLD. The other reason being that the guys who want all that stuff don't have much to offer, themselves.
Men fall into the same trap of wanting a woman who's slender, big boobs, smart, and can cook a 5 course meal.
I guess that's why I got snatched up so quickly!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lafleur
And for those women, I just want to see a pic. There's probably a pretty easy and quick explanation for their troubles.
I also think that a lot of these women are probably pretty standoffish. I can't tell you how many times I've been at a bar and looked over at a girl to find her with a disgusted look on her face like I'm some stalker or creep who shouldn't deserve to lay eyes on her, because I lost count.
So - what are the reasons that the men have so much trouble?
Yes. This isn't what I've seen, not on a consistent enough basis to constitute a distinct pattern. Some women don't have trouble attracting male attention. Others do. However, what I have noticed is that on the rare occasion women complain about struggling to get dates in the same way some of the men here do, they're disbelieved. They're hit with a barrage of posts that say women have it made in dating, they have guys lined up daily asking for dates, all they have to do is choose among the dozens of daily offers. One gets the impression that only men are allowed to complain of being dateless, on C-D.
Every time a woman complains about it, many men tell her she's lying or exaggerating because of course all women get hundreds of responses. When women mention most of those are from inappropriate men (married, men looking for sex, etc)they often get the comment "any response is better than none". There was a female poster here who if I recall got no messages at all, though she is pretty. Majority of the messages I received were from weird guys and usually inappropriate. For every normal guy who responded, I got 20 messages from guys not what I wanted (married, FWB, much older, etc).
So - what are the reasons that the men have so much trouble?
As for the guys on here specifically, it seems the prevailing issue is lack of confidence and fearing rejection. For me, it's that in addition to wariness after having attracted some real flakes. I'm just kinda fed up with it all.
I have not studied the posts in this forum long enough to say if your OP is correct, but I did just read an article yesterday that stated divorced men are twice as likely to remarry than women and hate being "alone" much more than women. My personal theory on why this is is because men benefit in many significant ways by being married compared to women. I think men do not want to be alone because they want someone to take care of them, their homes, etc... like a mom. I know this is sure to make someone irate, but having been married for 32 years, as a woman, I think that's it.
Gawd, this is depressing! I guess this is one reason women say it takes a ton of weeding to find even a hope for a match on OLD. The other reason being that the guys who want all that stuff don't have much to offer, themselves.
It's all about expectations. I'll use my most recent example of a relationship. My ex and I had a disagreement of the course our relationship was heading in. I said some things that weren't the nicest, because I felt she was getting cold feet again and not wanting to be in a relationship. In my mind, I felt we can work through it as long as we talk face to face. This dynamic change happened over text message. I have a lot of patience when it comes to people saying things that may hurt my feelings, because it's a part of life.
I don't know if anyone feels like this, but I don't buy into new relationships have to always be blissful. I'm 30 years old, and there's stuff that goes on around me that does get under my skin. If my girlfriend chews her toe nails in front of me, it's not going to be a dealbreaker. What I've noticed in myself, is my mindset of dating has switched from it needs to be blissful and how I feel, to can we get along and we find each other attractive. I've been single a lot of years, so I don't date expecting fireworks, because I hear the same comment from enough women who dated for fireworks and got burned by them.
I guess you can say I have unbelievably high tolerance for dating and dealing with the ups and downs, because at 30, we all have flaws. Some good and some bad. I'm not looking for the home run, I'm just looking to get on base. Now, I don't give every woman I come into contact with a chance to date me, because my on base percentage is rather high! (I can better analyze the pitches coming towards me)
Gawd, this is depressing! I guess this is one reason women say it takes a ton of weeding to find even a hope for a match on OLD. The other reason being that the guys who want all that stuff don't have much to offer, themselves.
So true. I've seen so many profiles from men who wanted something they weren't. Talking men with kids who wouldn't date single moms, severely obese men who would state "no fatties" on profiles, 50 something men who would say anyone over 35 was "too old" for them, etc. If one is going to be specific, make sure to have that particular trait because it becomes really offensive.
And for those women, I just want to see a pic. There's probably a pretty easy and quick explanation for their troubles.
It's rarely that simple. Some of those women have posted their pics in the past, and the membership has agreed that they're attractive enough. You see, what you're doing, in a way, is discounting their experience. You don't seem to want to believe that women who are at least average in looks could be invisible to men. Both genders have a hard time; sometimes the reason is something simple, like overcoming shyness. Often though, it seems to be a matter of not being the type who stands out in a crowd. Those people have to work harder to mingle , get involved in groups and get to know as many people as possible, hoping to someday find a match.
I have not studied the posts in this forum long enough to say if your OP is correct, but I did just read an article yesterday that stated divorced men are twice as likely to remarry than women and hate being "alone" much more than women. My personal theory on why this is is because men benefit in many significant ways by being married compared to women. I think men do not want to be alone because they want someone to take care of them, their homes, etc... like a mom. I know this is sure to make someone irate, but having been married for 32 years, as a woman, I think that's it.
The big reason is women have better support systems. Whether it be fellow women or other men. Men have a tendency to not have that luxury, because most women grow out of the phase of kicking it with the guy that has a plethora of female friends. Men, at least in my friend circle, tend to get committed and have less time to spend on just guy time. Where as the girls will plan a girls night bi-weekly, the guys may truly have a guys night at best monthly. Women do a much better job of supporting their fellow women than men do. When men become single, they have a tendency to want to rush out and hit on another woman. When women become single, they tend to fall back in the comfort of friendships and loved ones.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
