Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
No, it's called recognizing what's factually correct. Parents have kids to increase their happiness. They DON'T worry about whether that additional child will make the world a better place. In a lot of cases, that child makes the world worse off, but the parents don't care.
Quote:
Originally Posted by neutrino78x
If individuals don't reproduce, the species doesn't survive. Hence, all life has an instinct to reproduce. Without reproduction, there is no life and there is no evolution. It is fundamental to life.
Look up the definition of the word instinct. You clearly don't know what it means. Yes, if individuals don't reproduce, the species won't survive. But that doesn't make reproduction an instinctual behavior.
Once you have kids you are stuck together for life.Good or bad. You are forever joined together as parents. Even if you hate each other one day and get divorced.
I have a two cousins who are child free by choice. One cousin it was an extremely painful thing he did to Parents as his Parents had a hard time getting pregnant and only had one child a son, the son was named after the Father. Now all that work they did seeing numerous doctors, Mom being on Bed rest for Months and even fact they gave up their place near city to be out in sticks so they could provide their son a good life is all pointless. Their son has a PhD and a good job. His wife is a bit kooky as he sought out only a women who believed the earth is over populated and wanted a child free life. Him and his wife are mid 40s now and his parents are now around 80.
The other cousin had a sister who had three kids so it was not as stressful to his parents.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,989,150 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by SandyJet
One cousin it was an extremely painful thing he did to Parents as his Parents had a hard time getting pregnant and only had one child a son, the son was named after the Father. Now all that work they did seeing numerous doctors, Mom being on Bed rest for Months and even fact they gave up their place near city to be out in sticks so they could provide their son a good life is all pointless.
Wait. What was pointless? They had a child, the child has been successful. What did they do that was pointless?
Sounds like my friends. Bragged and Bragged and sent us pictures off all fun stuff they are doing. I think they are swingers or something
Wait, them sending you pictures of the fun stuff they're doing is bragging?
I have a friend who makes a lot of money, far more than I do. When we chat, he'll tell me about the new house he bought, the new car, the trip he took to France, etc. At first, I thought he was bragging, trying to rub it in my face that he's able to afford things that I can't. But then I realized I was actually letting my own insecurities cloud my thinking. It wasn't that he was bragging. I was just feeling bad about myself that I was living in a smaller place and unable to afford the kinds of things he could. That's what I think goes on with a lot of parents who feel like childfree folks are bragging. They aren't actually bragging. But the parents are starting to feel bad about the sacrifices they've had to make by having children. So how do I cope? By criticizing the people who are childfree. You'll see something similar between married folks and singles. The married person sees the single person out having fun, dating different people, having all kinds of wild sex, etc. But instead of being happy for that person, they'll accuse them of flaunting their lifestyle, of rubbing it in everyone else's face. That's where I think a lot of judgmental attitude towards the childfree and the people who label themselves childfree comes from. Please, stop punishing us childfree folks because you're not totally happy with your decision to have kids.
Ah yes, the old chestnut that people with kids are just envious of the childfree. I was wondering when that one would appear. I think that one is the center of the bingo card.
Ah yes, the old chestnut that people with kids are just envious of the childfree. I was wondering when that one would appear. I think that one is the center of the bingo card.
Did I say this is true of ALL parents? No. But I suspect it's true of a good number of them, at least the ones that are quick to judge those of us who don't want kids. Why does it bother anyone if I choose to call myself childfree? Does that hit a nerve somewhere? I don't judge those who decide to have kids. And I can even admit to being envious at times of what they have. But what I can't stand is when people with kids accuse me of bragging all because I mention how I'm able to afford nice things since I don't have kids to support. How is that bragging? It's not. It's simply stating a fact. Should I just keep my mouth shut and not tell people about the nice car I bought or the expensive trip I took? I refuse to play that game. I refuse to keep quiet about what I'm able to do with my life all because SOME parents are a bit sensitive to hearing about all the things I can do that they can't.
Did I say this is true of ALL parents? No. But I suspect it's true of a good number of them, at least the ones that are quick to judge those of us who don't want kids. Why does it bother anyone if I choose to call myself childfree? Does that hit a nerve somewhere? I don't judge those who decide to have kids. And I can even admit to being envious at times of what they have. But what I can't stand is when people with kids accuse me of bragging all because I mention how I'm able to afford nice things since I don't have kids to support. How is that bragging? It's not. And yet, I've had a number of parents accuse me of bragging just because I pointed out how not having kids has enabled me to buy a nicer car or stay out late with my friends.
No, you didn't say it about everyone with kids, just someone who dared to suggest some people she knows personally are bragging.
No, you didn't say it about everyone with kids, just someone who dared to suggest some people she knows personally are bragging.
Because I call into question whether she can truly recognize what qualifies as bragging. If I buy an expensive car and tell my friends about it, is that bragging? No. I'm simply telling about something new in my life. But sadly, some people are quick to slap the bragging label onto you.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,989,150 times
Reputation: 40635
I think its a grass is always greener thing, or something akin to that. I have had many a married with kids guys I worked with to tell me to stay single and childfree and that they envy my life.
They also beam like crazy when they speak about their children, and they say they can't imagine a life without them and wouldn't want to.
Both can be true.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
