Is it weird/creepy for a 19 year old to date a 17 year old? (married, guys)
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It is creepy because of the difference in independence/power levels - it is a power difference when one person has complete freedom, worldliness, independence to make decisions and live on their own, while the other is still tethered to the parents needing direction/supervision, especially with some of the (hopefully clear-headed) choices that need to be made as a 17 y.o. high schooler.
If I had some additional information, for example she was an emancipated minor living independently, maybe I might reach a different conclusion.
But, in general, I think a 19 y.o. college student dating a 17 y.o. high school student is creepy. And the laws may be on my side on this. I have to check. If it happened to my 17 y.o. daughter, I might even invoke those laws!
It is creepy because of the difference in independence/power levels - it is a power difference when one person has complete freedom, worldliness, independence to make decisions and live on their own, while the other is still tethered to the parents needing direction/supervision, especially with some of the (hopefully clear-headed) choices that need to be made as a 17 y.o. high schooler.
If I had some additional information, for example she was an emancipated minor living independently, maybe I might reach a different conclusion.
But, in general, I think a 19 y.o. college student dating a 17 y.o. high school student is creepy.
And the laws tend to be on my side on this. If it happened to my 17 y.o. daughter, I might even invoke those laws!
I understand most of you will disagree with me.
What about 18 year old college student dating 17 year old high school student?
I am female and at age 16 dated a college sophomore. This was in mid 1960s. He introduced me to blues music and was more interesting to talk to than most guys my age. He was drafted to VietbNam and wrote the most interesting letters. We decided we were better friends than lovers and remained so for some time.
What about 18 year old college student dating 17 year old high school student?
Why do you ask this question?
And once again, if you don't get a sense that you're being creepy and your friends haven't said anything about this being creepy, what brought the idea of creepiness to mind?
It is creepy because of the difference in independence/power levels - it is a power difference when one person has complete freedom, worldliness, independence to make decisions and live on their own, while the other is still tethered to the parents needing direction/supervision, especially with some of the (hopefully clear-headed) choices that need to be made as a 17 y.o. high schooler.
If I had some additional information, for example she was an emancipated minor living independently, maybe I might reach a different conclusion.
But, in general, I think a 19 y.o. college student dating a 17 y.o. high school student is creepy.
And the laws tend to be on my side on this. If it happened to my 17 y.o. daughter, I might even invoke those laws!
I understand most of you will disagree with me.
What laws would those be? Age of consent in most states is 16, some are younger while others throw in an age difference, so you'd be out of gas, I see your state of Illinois is 17.
You'd have a hard time convincing a District Attorney that a college freshman is in a position of "power and authority" over a high school Junior/Senior unless they worked together.
So no, the laws aren't really "on your side in this".
You certainly could forbid your daughter to see the guy, but that would be like throwing raw meat into a cage of hungry wolves.
What about 18 year old college student dating 17 year old high school student?
Why do you even care? If you like the 17 year old, date/befriend her until she is 18 (which should be this year because she is a senior). Life will go on. You're putting way more analysis into this than is needed for something so minor and temporary.
And once again, if you don't get a sense that you're being creepy and your friends haven't said anything about this being creepy, what brought the idea of creepiness to mind?
I'm just asking the woman's opinion as an example, to see what she considers 'creepy'
The age gap of teenagers is much more significant than the gap between say, someone in their 20s or older.
No argument, but you realize that your in theory daughter is in high school with 19 year olds. A college freshmen and a high school senior, or even junior, aren't that much different in maturity levels and brain development in any case (with the male being the laggard).
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